


Will You Still Love Me When I'm No Longer Young And Beautiful?

by PanthaPrincess



Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Backstory, Emotions, Eventual Smut, F/M, First Love, Galactic Federation - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Oral Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rick and Morty - Freeform, Slow Burn, Underage Drug Use, Underage Smoking, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-11-03
Packaged: 2018-10-25 03:49:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 56,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10756107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PanthaPrincess/pseuds/PanthaPrincess
Summary: When a strange young woman turns up at the Smith household claiming to be an old friend, Rick is forced to confront a part of his life he's long since buried under years of drink, drugs, and space adventure. The past is pretty unavoidable when it's standing in your living room."Look, all I came here to say was, I don't blame you, so you should stop blaming yourself.""Well, unfortunately, you're about 40 years too late for that, Sweetheart."A story of first love, abduction, adventure, and alcohol abuse. Probably.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first EVER fanfic, although I have been a long time lurker. It's the first time in a long time I've actually written anything so... Please be gentle? This will (hopefully!) be a multi-chapter fic because I'm not good at short things. If you have any feedback it would be very much appreciated, I'm very nervous!
> 
> Story title from [Young And Beautiful by Lana Del Rey](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_1aF54DO60)

Beth sighed heavily as dust continued to rain down from the ceiling. They really needed to stop Jerry from watching any more home improvement shows. She slumped further back into the couch as Rick defiantly turned the volume on the television up further to muffle the thumping and swearing wafting down from the attic.

 

“Mom, when is Dad going to get a job?” Summer mumbled in her faux bored voice from the armchair, not looking up from her phone.

 

Beth drained her wine glass. “I don't know, Summer” She sighed, heaving herself up and crossing to the kitchen for a refill. A couple more drinks and maybe her nerves would stop rattling.

 

Just as the 'Ball Fondlers' theme song started to blare out through the TV speakers, Morty came staggering into the living room carrying a tattered cardboard box, white dust and spider webs sticking to his sweaty face.

 

“Hey – Hey Mom? Th-this is the last of the boxes”

 

“Oh thank you, Dear” Beth crooned sticking her head round the kitchen door, “Just pop it in the corner with the rest of the stuff.”

 

“Y-You know, I'm not sure Dad's going to be able to do this loft conversion thing on his own, ma-may-maybe we could, ya know, call someone? Like a builder?” Morty said sheepishly as he flopped down onto the floor by Rick's feet.

 

“Morty – Morty don't be disparaging about your Father, he's a regular oOOULld, regular old Ty Pennington” Rick said with a smirk, taking a swig from his beer.

 

Beth pointedly ignored her father “Yeh, well, we'll just see how long it takes before he loses interest.” She said to no one in particular, making a mental note to look up a workman in the morning to fix the mess Jerry will inevitably make.

 

“Anyway, it's a good excuse to clear out the crawl space. Speaking of which, Dad, I found a box of your stuff up there from Mom's house” Beth said coming back to sit next to her father, a near overflowing glass of red in her hand.

 

“Just stuff you left behind when you... when you went... away” Beth trailed off, looking misty-eyed up at Rick.

 

He grunted none committally back, “Yeh? Well if I left it behind, i-i-i-it clearly wasn't important was it?” Rick replied, his attention firmly on the orally fixated alligator machine gunning bad guys on screen.

 

Beth flinched at the unintended dig, and Summer rolled her eyes at her Grandfathers mind-boggling lack of tact.

 

“Hey, Grandpa Rick, it could be fun to look through your old stuff, could be some long forgotten inventions in there that Morty and I could use for science projects!”

 

Summer had become well versed in defusing her family's self-induced drama. She got up to search through the pile of dusty boxes at the back of the room, snorting in amusement when she spotted one at the back with 'BASTARD' scrawled angrily across the top in black marker. After heaving it into the middle of the rug in front of the TV, she sat down next to Morty on the floor and the two of them started to rifle through its contents.

 

It mostly contained papers covered in equations and symbols which neither Morty nor Summer could ever hope to understand. Morty pulled out what looked like a life-vest covered in plunger ends and held it up to Rick, demanding an explanation.

 

“Hmm?” Rick murmured steadfastly ignoring the slow unpacking of what remained of his old life at his feet.

 

“Wh-what's this, Rick? Is it like a-a...a cosmic radiation buffering device? Or – or – or a... nanoparticle ion shield?” Morty excitedly cobbling together random sci-fi sounding words, as was his habit.

 

“What? N-no, Morty” Rick grumbled, dragging his eyes away from the on-screen carnage. “It's a life-vest covered in plungers. I was trying to stick myself to the ceiling, dogs can't look up” His explanation left Morty none the wiser. “Not everything in my life is science related yOOOUUu - you know?” Rick continued, returning his attention to 'Ball Fondlers'.

 

“Could've fooled me” Beth muttered into her rapidly emptying wine glass. Rick didn't respond.

 

As the floor in front of them gradually started to disappear under papers, gadgets, old pens, and dog-eared books, Rick reluctantly began to draw his eyes away from the screeching television and started to indulge his overly sentimental family. By the time the credits were rolling, all four of them were sat cross-legged on the rug, with Rick holding court, explaining complicated bits of mathematics and demonstrating the various little devices. Beth stared doe-eyed at her father, drinking in this new information, even if she didn't really understand it all, it was still precious to her.

 

A well-thumbed book with a bright, abstract cover caught Summer's eye. Snatching it up from the pile she began to leaf through it. Apparently, it was about art, cool! Just as she was thinking about asking Rick if she could borrow it for her research into turquoise, a small piece of paper fell out of the middle.

 

Picking it up she realised it was a portrait photography of a girl, probably around Summer's own age. Although it was in colour, the photo had a brownish hue, with frayed edges and rounded corners. That along with the girl's frankly awful fashion sense suggested it was pretty old. She wore a deep orange, low cut blouse with a comically large collar. Summer thought the top clashed terribly with the girls auburn hair, although the cute messy pixie cut suited her angular features. Turning it over in her hands she saw printed on the back in neat handwriting 'Alice Montgomery, 1973'. Jesus, it was old. She had kind eyes, highlighted in thick retro eyeliner, with a wicked smile playing about her mouth.

 

“Hey, Grandpa Rick, who's this?”

 

Rick looked up from where he was wrapping Morty's wrists in a coppery looking string attached to a small metallic claw. He paused mid-sentence, mouth slightly agape, and Summer thought she could see the cogs turning in his mind as his vaguely irritated expression slowly drained into one of forced blankness.

 

“Aw jeez Rick, she's hot!” Morty exclaimed, “I-I-I-I-I mean sh-sh-she's pretty, y-you know, in-in an objective kind of a way.” A shocking shade of puce slowly crept it's way up Morty's face.

 

Rick shot a sly glance at Morty. “Oh, in an 'objective kind of a way', huh Morty? Don't - don't pull a muscle, that's pretty big word for you” He scoffed. “She's was an old *Buuurp* just an old school fr – an old acquaintance, Summer, you can put it in the trash pile,” He said waving his hand dismissively.

 

“Aw Dad, Morty's right she's lovely! You should keep that, it's a memento of your younger days” Beth smiled indulgently at the photo Summer was holding aloft, prompting Rick to roll his eyes.

 

“Sweetie, the minute I need visual aids to access parts of my memory, you have my permission to shoot me in the hEEEEAd” Rick belched, he glanced briefly back at the photo, then with a little shake of his head, returned to focus on the copper string again, which seemed to have taken on a life of its own and was crawling steadily up Morty's arms, waving its ends like little feelers, apparently intent on strangling him.

 

Summer frowned, eyeing Rick suspiciously. She was about to probe further into what she may have naively thought was a flash of pain in Rick's eyes when he looked at the photo, but that was promptly forgotten about as Jerry chose that exact moment to crash unceremoniously through the ceiling, landing with a thud and a weak groan behind the sofa.

 

All thoughts of photographs with hidden meanings were quickly forgotten as the Smiths rushed to the aid of a sobbing Jerry, while Rick leant back against the sofa base, swigged from his flask. And if - in the foray of getting Jerry bundled into the car to be taken to the hospital - anybody saw Rick pick up the photo and slide it discreetly into one of the many pockets, nobody mentioned it. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! The prologue is probably a bit long and boring but I wanted to get my hand in before setting off on this journey. With any luck, the next chapter will be better!


	2. I Was Just Getting Used To Living Life Without You Around

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Smiths get and unexpected visitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from [Pink Rabbits by The National](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCEr4XbyLR8)

Summer was livid. Her weekend was totally ruined. This was, without a doubt, the worst day of her life. She'd had it all planned out; have a chilled out morning, maybe convince Rick to take her along on an adventure, then cruise up in his spaceship, fashionably late, to the Seniors Halloween party. She even had a convoluted plan to get Toby Matthews to make out with her. But no. She'd be woken up at 8 am by her Mother, insisting she had to help take care of a now invalided Jerry.

 

As per usual Morty and Rick had been let off the hook and were off on some high-flying quest to get some dumb frozen space ink or something, and she was here, spoon feeding Jerry 'Cherry Garcia' while he sat miserably in a wheelchair, sporting an almost full body cast. Why did she always have to pull the short straw?

 

“Come on Dad, you'll have to open your mouth wider than that or it'll drip down your neck brace again” She huffed.

 

“But it huuuuurts” Jerry moaned in a melodramatic fashion.

 

“Yeh. I know. You've mentioned that five hundred times already!” Summer yelled.

 

She was just contemplating dumping the rest of the ice cream on Jerry pathetic little head when the doorbell rang.

 

“Summer?” Beth called from where she was hiding upstairs “Would you get the door?”

 

“Arrrgh!” Summer let out a small frustrated scream. “Stay Put.” She shot at her father, emphasising the point with a violent air poke in his direction. He flinched back like a kicked puppy.

 

“Why do I have to do everything around here! Why does Morty get to go off and do fun stuff with Grandpa, while I'm stuck here looking after Charlie Chaplin in there!” She shouted up the stairs as she entered the hallway.

 

She wrenched the door open, “What?!” She demanded, ice cream carton still in hand.

 

The visitor stepped back in alarm, holding her hands up in defence.

 

“I-I Sorry, I must have the wrong house, you don't by any chance know where Rick Sanchez lives do you?”

 

Summer stared, her eyes narrowing. The woman looked dishevelled, a long black coat over tattered jeans and a hoodie, hood pulled up against the cool autumn air. She was a little taller than Summer, but not by much. Maybe in her early forties? No, she looked like shit, but she wasn't that old. Dark bags under her eyes and gaunt features belied her young face, she can't have been more than thirty.

 

“Who's asking?” Summer demanded, less aggressive, more suspicious.

 

“I'm an... An old friend. I was just in the area and thought I'd pop in.” She sounded hopeful, if a little unsure of herself.

 

“You're an old friend, who knows him well enough to just 'pop in' unannounced, but you were surprised to see someone other than him answer the door, which made you doubt the address, so you've never been here before. So either you're lying, or you're not that close.” Summer smiled smugly. She didn't know whether to be disappointed that Rick wasn't there to witness her expect interrogation skills or be worried about how distrusting and sceptical he'd made her.

 

The stranger gave Summer a wry smile from under her hood. “So you do know him then.”

 

Ah... Perhaps she'd given too much away. Maybe Rick wouldn't be so impressed after all.

 

“Look, I'm not sure I should let you in, maybe come back whe-” Summer was cut off by a pitiful wail emanating from the living room.

 

“Oh Jesus Christ, Dad!” She rushed off after the sound, leaving the strange woman on the step with the door wide open. Summer let out an exasperated sigh upon finding Jerry sprawled out on the floor, plaster-cast clad limbs sticking out at odd angles.

 

“What the hell are you doing Dad? I told you to stay put!” She yelled, putting her hands under his armpits to try and heave him back into the wheelchair.

 

“I was trying to see who was at the door, it could have been for me!” Jerry retorted meekly.

 

“Why would it be for you Dad?” She sighed angrily, “you don't have any friends, and if you did, I doubt they'd care enough to visit.” She panted with the effort of trying to untangle Jerry from himself.

 

“Here, let me help.” A voice piped up for the entrance to the living room. Apparently discontent with being left at the door, the stranger had let themselves in.

 

“Oh, that's ok-” Summer began, but the woman paid no mind, slinging her arms under one of Jerry's and aiding Summer to plonk him back into his chair.

 

“Thank you very much,” Jerry said with exaggerated politeness. “At least someone is will to take pity on me!” He shot at Summer who rolled her eyes and folded her arms.

 

“That's alright.” The woman responded kindly.

 

“What the hell is going on?” Beth had entered the room, drawn from her hiding place by the ruckus downstairs. “Who are you?” She asked the woman.

 

The woman had started to look a little uncomfortable at all the pairs of eyes trained on her. She lowered her hood and shook out her messy auburn hair, which was cut jaggedly into a bob, ending just above her pointy chin. Summer got a sudden hit of deja vu, there was something about her she recognised now that she could see her face properly, maybe the woman _had_ been here before.

 

“Erm... Well, I'm a friend of Rick Sanchez, I was looking for him, but I still don't know if this is even his house ha ha...” She trailed off with a nervous laugh.

 

Beth perked up at the mention of her father's name, any previously unknown fact about Rick was like crack to her. “You know my Dad?” she said hopefully, stepping toward the girl.

 

But instead of nodding in assertion at a fact an old friend should probably know, the woman's eyes bulged in alarm.

 

“Your... He's...You're his daughter?” she said in shock. Beth nodded, a confused smile on her face. The woman let out a little laugh.

 

“Well I never, I honestly... wasn't expecting that. I mean I probably should have, it's been a long time.” She muttered, almost to herself.

 

“Well, why don't we all sit down, we're not being very good hosts here at all. This nice young woman looks tired out!” Jerry exclaimed from behind everyone, clearly annoyed to be missing out on the action.

 

Summer was instructed to fetch sweet tea, must to her chagrin, as Beth got the young woman seated. Soon they were all sitting looking at her expectantly as she gulped down tea like she'd never seen water.

 

“Ahh, that's delicious thank you.” She smiled at Beth. “You know, this is going to sound really weird, but when you came through the door, for a minute I thought you were _another_ one of my old friends.”

 

“Oh really?” Said Beth.

 

“Yeh, Diane Murphy. You look just like her.” The scruffy woman laughed.

 

“Oh! Well yes, she was my mother! You knew her too?” Beth exclaimed with a smile. She began to stare wistfully off into the middle distance, her eyes becoming misty. “This is amazing, I can't believe this is finally happening. I've waited so long to share in these parts of my father's life. I've never actually met one of my parent's old friends. To tell the truth, he doesn't talk about any of his old friends. But now he's back in my life, all this is possible and it's just the best feeling.” Beth rambled. “Although you do look a little young to have known them back when they were together. What did you say your name was again?”

 

“I didn't.”

 

Her clipped, dark tone made Beth turn sharply to look at her and was shocked to find the woman scrutinising her with a look of horror and mild disgust. In a second she was on her feet marching towards the front door.

 

“I'm sorry to have intruded, thank you for the tea,” She said over her shoulder, not looking back. However just as she was reaching for the handle the door was flung wide open. When Beth and Summer finally rounded the corner into the hall they found their guest eye to eye with a very shocked looking Rick Sanchez.

 

“Oh Dad, you have a visi-” But before Beth could finish her sentence Rick had stepped back and levelled his ray-gun between the woman's eyes. The gun whined as it changed up ready to fire, his finger poised on the trigger, and Rick's shocked expression had morphed into one of pure unadulterated fury.

 

“Who the fuck are you, and what the fuck are you doing in my house?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'd really appreciate any feedback you may have.


	3. It's A Tragic Thrill, I'm Finding Out Who I Was, And Who I Really Am

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Smith's finally start to get some answers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from [Tragic Thrill by Foxy Shazam](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmjlEntyr9o)
> 
> This chapter is a bit longer than the others, and full of made up science, so if it doesn't make sense please let me know and I'll give it another shot!
> 
> Follows directly on from Chapter 2

“Rick!”  
“Dad!”

Everyone was frozen in place. Beth and Summer clutching each other in horror by the entrance to the living room, Rick standing at the open front door, a look of pure disgust on his face, an alarmed Morty peeking out from behind Rick's back, and in the middle of it all stood the raggedy stranger looking surprisingly relaxed for someone with a plasma pistol to their head. 

“I won't ask again” Rick spoke in a slow, deadly voice.

“It's me, Rick, I swear, this isn't a trap, I'm not trying to trick you just let me explain.” The woman spoke in an eerily calm manner.

“No, it's not 'You'. This IS a trap and a shitty one at that. W-wh-what did you think would happen here? I'd welcome you in with open arms and we'd make up for lost time by discussing the equation that makes my portal gun work? Or - or the formula for concentrated dark matter? By the way whoever thought to use 'you' was a bit of a sick fuck, but you know, I take my hat off to them, I-I-I didn't even know anyone knew about you.” 

“Dad...” Beth began slowly, not wanting to spark a riot in her hallway. “I don't know what's going on here but - but I think it would be a lot easier to sort it out if you put the gun down.”

“He has a gun?!” Jerry frantically called from where he was stranded the living room. Everyone ignored him.

“Beth, Sweetie,” Rick said through gritted teeth, “stay out of this please, take Morty and Summer into the lounge.”

All of a sudden the strange woman let out an incredulous yell, “You called her Beth?!” Her calm facade had finally cracked, startling the assembled crowd, Rick's gun hand falter slightly. 

“Are you frigging kidding me? Beth? Was-Was that meant to be some kind of tribute? After you shacked up with my best friend! I guess calling her Alice was a little near the knuckle even for you.” She said incredulously.

Summer gasped dramatically from where she was standing behind her mother, prompting the whole standoff to turn and look at here. “Of course! Now I know where I know you from, you're Alice Montgomery! I found a photo of you last week. But wouldn't you... That was taken years ago, you should be old now like Grandpa Rick...” Summer trailed off, her grand theory starting to fall apart. 

“Exactly Su _UUUM_ \- Summer,” Rick said shooting a brief admiring look at his granddaughter. “A-And besides, Alice is dead. So either you're from another dimension where you survived in which case you're here to do another Rick's bidding, or y-y-you're some dodgy clone, or you're a robot probably from the Brancras Nebula, or you're something cooked up in a Federation lab. Either way, you have about five seconds to get out or I'll shoot you.”

“You're Rick C137,” Alice said, squaring her shoulder and staring him down. “I was abducted in 1975 from your backyard and taken to a higher level universe, I escaped and I've spent the last 2 years trying to track you down. And now I've finally done it! Despite the fact you have a penchant for switching dimensions.” She took a deep, calming breath. “It's fine if you don't believe me, I'll walk out that door and you'll never see me again” She leant up and pressed her forehead to the muzzle of the pistol. “Or you could shoot me, at this point I really don't care.” Despite the fact her eyes had started to water slightly, she had a defiant look on her face, her jaw set, like a woman with nothing left to lose. “Look all I came here to say was, I don't blame you, so you should stop blaming yourself.”

Rick said nothing for what seemed like an eternity. Slowly he lifted his finger from the trigger, searching her face for any flicker of doubt, any trace of a lie. But all he found was fire, and anger, and sadness. He lowered his gun to his side. “Well, unfortunately, you're about 40 years too late for that, Sweetheart.”

.

\----------

.

To say things had calmed down, was probably a bit of an overstatement, but at the very least no one was threatening to blow anybody's brains out anymore. After a small amount of awkward shuffling around, the Smith's, Rick, and Alice were all sat rigidly in the living room. The tension in the air was palpable to everyone, save from Jerry who seemed completely oblivious to all nuances of social interaction. He was just happy the drama was taking place where he could see it. 

Alice had just finished explaining her side of what was turning out to be a fairly bizarre story, and after about ten minutes of no one speaking, Jerry finally broke the silence. 

“Well, I'm glad we're all on the same page now,” He began with the overconfidence of someone who didn't have the faintest clue what was going on. “Speaking of which, Rick, you know that I don't mind you staying here but this is still my house and I'd appreciate it if you didn't play with guns around my children.” He affected a superior tone. The chorus of 'shut up Jerry' echoed from all corners of the room. 

Rick leant back in his armchair presenting an air of effortless authority, his gun still held loosely in his hand. 

“I'm not saying I believe you” He began, sharp eyes fixed on Alice. “You've still got a looooot of explaining to do, I mean th-th-this is a big – a pretty big claim you're making here.”

“M-may – may I ask a question, Ali – Ms Mon-Montgomery?” Morty began nervously. 

“Morty – Morty, th-this isn't the time for your asinine questions, ok? Can't – can't you see Grandpa's busy here?”

Morty turned and shot daggers at Rick through narrowed eyes. “H-hey, you know what Rick, no! I-I-i-it is time for my questions. Y-y-y-you came in here, you know, waving - waving a gun around at-at some poor lady, who - we don't even know who she is, and you're demanding that we all follow your lead with-without explanation. Yeh I – I think it is time for me to start asking questions, Rick. You're constantly drawing all th-this unwanted attention onto our family. Y-yo-you, I'm fine with it, I signed up for this, but no one else did, Rick! So yeh, I think it is time for my questions Rick!” Morty finished his tirade breathing hard, everyone staring at him in wide-eyed alarm. 

“Jeez, Morty, ke-keep your wig on, Christ. Fine w-we-we'll do it your way, Morty, but might I just add that none of this w _OOOUD_ – this wouldn't be happening if Summer hadn't let this person into the house in the first place” Rick shot accusingly at Summer. 

“Hey! Don't blame me! You're the one who-” She started back.

“ENOUGH! Ok?” Morty yelled, he turned in his seat to look at Alice, who looked thoroughly miserable to have brought this on everyone. “M-Ms Montgomery? So ju-just tell me if I have this right.” He cleared his throat and began to recount what they'd just been told. 

“Your name is Alice Elizabeth Montgomery, and you were born in Chicago in 1956. You met Rick when you were 17, a-and you were, you know, erm... 'together'.” Rick let out a small huff of amusement at his grandson's bashful explanation, Morty shot his an irritated look to shut him up.

He continued “So o-on the 10th December 1975 you were helping Rick with an experiment in his backyard and you were abducted by beings from... from..” 

“Interdimensional beings from a higher universe, yes” Alice finished for him. 

Morty smiled in thanks. “So my-my question is, what exactly does that mean a-a-and why, i-if you are telling the truth, which I'm not saying you aren't!” He said in a rush, “W-why are you not old? I mean you should be like at least sixty, a-a-and you sure as heck don't look it, you look amazing! Ha... ha” Morty gave a nervous laugh, his face flushing. 

Rick rolled his eyes. “I can explain that, i-i-it's quite simple Mo _OOOURT_ y.” He paused to drink deeply from his flask. “You remember when we went into my micro-verse battery? A-a-and that egocentric green testicle took us into his mini-verse, then that little Moomin guy took us into his teeny-verse? Well, we were stuck in the teeny-verse for months, whereas we only left Summer in the car for about an hour, which by the way is an impressively short amount of time to ruin a whole planet's ice cream, s-so, you know, once again, props to you there Summer.”

Summer crossed her arms are scowled haughtily up at Rick from where she was sitting on the floor. 

He continued, “So if you've been inside the universe equivalent of a Russian doll, Morty, it doesn't take that much of a mental leap to realise our universe is probably inside another larger universe, or a 'macro-verse' if you will, and that macro-verse is more than likely inside another even bigger universe! I-I-I mean it's universes all the way down, Baby!” Rick had become quite animated in his explanations, but as he turned to see the blank looks on his family's simple faces, it was clear he'd lost them. 

“Please don't make me get the dry-erase board out again” He gave an exasperated sigh. “L-L-Look, w-what I'm saying is all time is relative. Even though we experience it in a linear form, it bends and warps around us depending on our environment. From the perspective of the teeny-verse, which is several orders of magnitude smaller than our own, time in our universe appears to be running slower, despite the fact when you're standing in either one it appears to be a constant. It stands to reason that if you went up a layer from our universe, the time there, relative to us would run slower too.” He looked around the room at their dawning comprehension, then over to Alice who was nodding at him with a sad smile. 

“To me,” Rick concluded, “Alice has been gone for over 40 years, but to her, it's only been what? A decade?”

“About a decade, yeh” Alice replied, her voice cracking slightly with emotion.

It was like a Christmas light switch on as faces started to light up in comprehension around the room, apart from Jerry who was, as always, the flickering bulb. Rick sat back with a smug smile, they were all so easy to impress. 

“Of course, while this little story of yours is very entertaining and all, I'm a scientist, I-I-I'm - I need some hard evidence.” Said Rick, gesturing casually with his gun. 

“Dad, you can't be serious?!” Beth implored, “This woman has travelled across galaxies just to see you again! How can that not be enough for you? What I wouldn't give to have someone that cared about me that much” She said wistfully, surely it was time for a glass of wine. 

“Hey!” Jerry piped up, “I care about you that much! I drove for eleven hours straight from Sacramento just to see you!” He complained in a whiny voice. 

“Yes, Jerry, because you thought I was sleeping with the mailman.” Beth sighed. 

Rick rose out of his seat and came to stand behind Jerry's wheelchair, “Well, as much as I mourn your lack of emotion and physical satisfaction, Sweetie,” Taking the handles of the chair he turned him so he was facing the wall. “I'm not that big on grand *Buuurp* gestures myself.” Satisfied, despite his weak protests, he had quite literally evicted Jerry from the conversation, he approached Alice. 

“I prefer something a little more empirical.” With that, he pulled a syringe out of his pocket and stabbed in firmly into her neck. 

“Ow, Jesus Rick! What the fuck?” 

Pulling back on the plunger he drew out a vial of blood. “Well a-a-at least we know you're made of organic matter.” He muttered. 

Withdrawing the syringe and putting it back in his pocket, he took Alice firmly by the upper arm, lifting her from the sofa. 

“Well, I'll be in touch in a few days! If it really is you, then we'll go for a drink, if not, I guess I'll just have to torture you for information.”

Before anyone had a chance to react Rick had pulled Alice into the hallway, stopping just before he opened the door. He spun her to face him, dragging her close he looked deep into her eyes. The intensity of his stare made her blush. 

She could see him now. The twenty-two year old she'd left behind had turned into an old man, and she'd been a little shocked at first, but he was unmistakable. And now for the first time since laying eyes on him again, she could see a glimpse of what lay behind the facade, the Rick she'd fallen in love with. He was so close that when he spoke his breath brushed her lips.

“If I find out you've been lying, about any of this, I will kill you. Do you understand?” His tone was soft, but she knew he meant every word of it. 

“Yes.” she breathed. And with that, she flung out onto the step, and the door was slammed firmly in her face. 

.

\----------

.

Rick leant back against the closed door, his blood pounding in his ears. Listening carefully to the retreating footsteps outside he closed his eyes and let the events of the day wash over him like a tidal wave of crap. He needed a drink, now. Opening his eyes he found himself face to face with an anxious looking Morty. 

“H-hey, Rick? Ar-are you ok? That was a – that was pretty intense, huh?” The boy gave a weak smile, he meant well Rick supposed.  
“Yeh, Morty, I'm fine. I-I – I've got work to do.” Rick sighed, the fight had gone out of him. 

“Y-you need any help? I can just be quiet and pass you stuff?” 

That drew a small smile from Rick, he ruffled Morty's hair as he passed on his way to the garage. 

“That's ok, Morty, just - just go watch TV” He replied over his shoulder. 

Morty retreated back to the living room and found everyone staring at him expectantly. Someone had even taken pity on Jerry and turned his wheelchair back around. 

“How is he?” Beth asked, wringing her hands together in the same way Morty often did. 

He sighed. “Well he's just ruffled my hair, so – so I'm guessing not good.”

.

\----------

.

It was just gone 3 am and Rick was slumped back in his spinny chair, his second bottle of vodka, nearly empty, held between his long fingers. He was slowly wheeling himself around the garage like a miserable, dismantled Dalek, waiting for the DNA testing machine to finish processing. 

Part of him hoped she was just a cheap imposter, some intergalactic pirate's twisted idea of applying pressure, waiting for him to crack. It would be easy if she was a fraud, just kill her and life would go back to normal. He'd somehow make his mawkish family forget all about this juicy little tip bit from his past, they didn't need to dwell on it. Hell, even he tried not to think about it most of the time. 

But there was another part of him - the part that he was currently attempting to drown in cheap spirits - that hoped she was real, that had always hoped she was still alive, and maybe that part of him could be vindicated. But those were dangerous thoughts. False hope was the pacifier of the simple-minded, he was above that. The last of the vodka slipping down his throat said differently. What would it achieve anyway? It's not like things could go back to the way they were. Her twenty-two year old lover was now a sixty-four year old man.

He leant back in his chair and groaned softly, the empty bottle clinking to the floor, this wasn't how today was meant to go. It was meant to be a quick in and out mission with Morty to harvest some Dlipdlank ink from the frozen plains on Axon-9-5, then back home to rescue Summer from Jerry's feeble clutches. He'd planned to take the pair of them to an afternoon screening of 'Jan Quadrant Vincent 18: Too Hot To Vincent'. Despite outward appearances, he did dedicate a minute portion of his massive intellect to his grandkid's well-being.

He jumped when the DNA machine beep, nearly falling out of his chair. He thurst-scooted his way over to the desk to read the print that was being spat out of the side. As his eyes quickly scanned the numbers and letters, and his heart began to sink. Well fuck.


	4. I Wish That I Had Known In That First Minute We Met, The Unpayable Debt That I Owed You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Added some tags for drug use and smoking.  
> Chapter title from [Kettering by The Antlers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8We0FVflGaU)

In the two days that followed Alice crash landing into everyone's lives, nobody saw much of Rick at all. Morty had tried to spend time with him but mostly he'd been too drunk to be coherent, asleep, or glaring so fiercely at whatever he was working on Morty was afraid to speak. 

On the third day, he re-emerged from the garage and the Smiths had started to play a game called 'Who Can Be The Most Normal', and Rick was pretending not to notice. Morty felt like he should say something but was afraid to burst the bubble of forced calm that had settled over the house and reveal something much worse. They went out together that day and it was mostly fine, the adrenaline of being chased by an eight foot snail-like creature making them both forget about the events of days previous. But as soon as they returned home, the smog of unspoken words engulfed them again, and it was all Morty could do not to reach for a bottle as well. 

By day four it had gotten to the point where the elephant in the room was going to have to start paying rent. Morty and Summer had had a hushed late night conversation, trying to come up with a strategy to find out what had happened to Alice, but neither of them was brave enough to carry it out. Either she had been lying and she was dead, or she was telling the truth, either way, it was clear to everyone that Rick was not coping well with the outcome.

By the time dinner came around on day five Beth had had enough. 

“So, Dad, what happened with your friend?” She asked casually, her tight smile the only thing giving her away. 

“Hmm? Oh, y-y-you don't have to worry about that, Sweetie, she won't be bothering us again.” He replied calmly, not looking up from where he was spearing green beans onto his fork. 

“My God, Dad, did you kill that poor woman?” Beth said in horror, dropping her own fork on her plate with a clatter. 

“What? No, I said I'd only kill her if she was an imposter. It r _EEEAAL_ lly was her, I just never called. She came across a bit clingy, you know? No-no one needs psycho bitches, am I right?” He said jovially, nudging Morty with his elbow and giving him a wink. Everyone just stared at him awkwardly.

“Speaking of which,” He said, his frown returning, “Can you all stop tip toeing around me? I'm not some hormone-addled teenage girl with a broken heart, y-y-you don't need to worry about me locking myself in my room and blaring 'My Chemical Romance' then slitting my wrists in the bath.” He began gesturing with his fork. 

“So just forget about the other day, forget - forget about _Alice_ , and just carry on as normal, as normal as you lot ever are.” He placed his knife and fork down on the plate and pushed his chair away from the table as if to finalise the matter. “That was a _lovely_ meal, Beth, one of your best.” He got up and started to head to the garage. 

“Dad, wait, you can't just leave it like that!” Beth implored, Rick paused with his hand on the door frame. 

“Yeh, Grandpa Rick, Alice seemed really nice, why don't you try being a gentleman for once and call her.” Summer reproached. 

“Well if you ask me-” Jerry began.

“Well nobody did, Jerry!” Rick spat, spinning round to fix them all with a scowl. “I-I-I-I didn't ask any of you. Maybe be if you weren't so concerned with getting involved in other peoples lives, y-y-you could focus on making your own less horrifyingly boring. An-and, you know, don't - excuse me for not wanting to take relationship advice from a couple who literally hate the ground each other walks on, a pubescent boy, and a girl who falls in love with anyone who so much as - as sneezes near her!” He glared at them all. 

“Hey, I-I-I didn't say a word, Rick!” Morty exclaimed. 

Rick huffed and stormed past in the other direction, headed for his bedroom. “You didn't have to, Morty, you don't have to.”

The rest of the family sat in silence listening to Rick's angry retreating footsteps and then the slamming of his bedroom door. 

“Maybe we shouldn't have said anything” Beth spoke in a hushed worried voice. 

“No, Honey, you were right to, sometimes Rick needs to hear the truth, even if he doesn't like it,” Jerry said in an attempt at being reassuring. 

“Oh you're just loving this aren't you, Jerry, any excuse to start an argument with him and you're all over it like a rash, hoping one day he'll just leave again!” Beth yelled back.

Sensing an impending argument, Morty and Summer looked at each other and silently agreed to retreat upstairs. At least the fight was confined to the dining room seeing as Jerry couldn't manoeuvre himself anywhere else with all his plaster casts. 

Convening on the landing, Morty and Summer stood outside their respective rooms. 

“Jeez, Summer, wh-what are we gonna do? This doesn't look like this is going to end anytime soon. I just want everything to – to go back to normal, you know?” Morty said looking downcast.

“It's simple, Morty, we just have to take matters into our own hands.” She said with a knowing smile. “If Grandpa Rick won't go to Alice, we'll just have to bring Alice to Grandpa Rick.” 

“Well, h-how – how-”

“Don't worry about it, Morty, I've got it aaaaall under control.” She said confidently with a wave of her fingers, then slipped into her room, closing the door behind her. 

Morty flinched as a plate smashed downstairs, he hoped for the sake of his nerves she was right.

.

\----------

.

After slamming the door firmly on the cretins he had the misfortune to call a family, Rick flopped down hard on his bed. Why they wouldn't just let it go was beyond him. People passed in and out of each other's lives all the time and we just forget about them, in the same way we forget about birthdays, or a pie in the oven, because in the grand scheme of things they aren't important. 

In truth, he did know why they wouldn't let it drop. It was because she had been part of _Rick's_ life. They thought that because she was someone he voluntarily formed an attachment to, that somehow made him more human and they just loooooved being reminded he was human. 

They put him up on this pedestal and made him integral to their lives, then wanted constant reassurance that he wouldn't leave them. They thought if they had evidence that he had a heart maybe he'd stay and _love_ them. It was all a load of crap. If there was one thing he hated it was clinginess, he did want to be _needed_. 

He sighed heavily and leant down, reaching blindly under his bed for a bottle of something, preferably at least 80 proof. His finger closed around cold glass and bringing it to his face he squinted at it in the dim light. Half a bottle of rum, that'd do. He took a long gulp, opening his throat and letting the cool liquid burn its way down to his stomach. Flopping his head back down on the pillow Rick closed his eyes and tried not to think, not an easy task when you're the smartest man in the galaxy, and probably beyond. 

Despite his best efforts to stop himself his hand slipped under his pillow and pulled out the photograph of Alice and stared at it. He should just throw it away, he had tried, many times, but he always stopped himself at the last minute. He wasn't a sentimental man by any means, but there was always an exception to every rule. 

Letting the rum bottle fall to his side he reached up a finger stroked down the side of her smiling face. She'd looked so different when he'd seen her in the hallway, she looked tired and thin like she hadn't slept in months. He couldn't imagine her cackling, infectious laugh coming out of those chapped lips, and the spark of warm affection he could see in these eyes had been snuffed out in the ones he'd seen days before. But there was no mistaking her. He could spot her in a crowd of thousands, he'd tried.

He took a few more good swigs of rum, before placing it on the floor, and curling up on his side. He felt very tired all of a sudden, he felt old. He closed his hand delicately around the picture of Alice, wishing he too could be frozen in time like the photograph, and as his eyelid began to be pulled down by sleep, his mind began wander to a place he very rarely let it stray. 

.

\----------

.

 _25th January 1973_

It was almost 11.30pm when Rick pulled up to the ostentation, suburban pile just south of Chicago. The place was crawling with teenagers, spilling out of the brightly lit house onto the lawn, dancing, laughing, and making out in the shadows. Slamming the car door he walked up the driveway, dodging drunk revellers, and ducked through the doorway. He grabbed a sober-ish looking boy just inside the door. 

“Where's Simon?” He demanded. The boy's eyes widened and darted around looking for a way to escape but couldn't make a run for it with Rick gripping the top of his arm. 

“Oh shit man, are you his Dad? I swear Si said you were cool with this!” The guy said in a rush. 

Rick raised an eyebrow “Do I _look_ old enough to be his Dad?” he asked plainly.

“Erm...” The boy still looked nervous, apparently being over the age of eighteen made you automatically old enough to be the parent of a teenager, even if you were only twenty. 

“Relax, dude,” Rick said, releasing his arm. “I'm his drug dealer.” 

The boy visibly relaxed. “Oh, cool, in that case he's in the back room I think”

Rick thanked him and offered him a small smile, then skirted around the kids dancing to Bowie in the hallway, heading for the back of the house. Entering the richly furnished back room he spotted the muscular meathead that was Simon Findlay slouched in an armchair, surrounded by his buddies. 

Kicked off the football team after an injury, the guy had taken to drugs to fill the void of his ruined budding career. Rick didn't care, he was a businessman, if this kid wanted to throw his life away because he didn't get the chance to become professionally concussed, that was his problem. 

Simon looked up at him with glassy eyes as he approached, breaking out into a big stupid smile. 

“Ricky!” He yelled, causing people nearby to turn round and stare. “I was wondering when you'd show up!”

“Yeh, sorry about that, I-I-I got caught up with something. Here's the stuff.” Reaching into his pocket of his leather jacket he pulled out a small paper wrap and held it out to Simon, but just as he went to grab it Rick whipped it out of his reach. 

“Ah ah ah, you know the drill, money first.” he berated. 

“Aw, come on Ricky, you know I'm good for it” The guy complained. 

“I'm not running a charity here. Give me the cash, then you can have your nose candy.” He replied in a bored voice, this interaction had already gone on for far too long.

“Fine, fine, you're the boss Ricky” Rick's eye twitched at the infantile nickname. Reaching into his back pocket Simon pulled out a wad of bills and slapped them into Rick's hand, and Rick returned the favour with the drugs. 

Simon fished out his keys and gently unwrapped the paper revealing a pale pink power inside. Take a little onto the end of the key he inhaled aggressively, then sat back and waited for it to kick in. 

Another oafish boy sat next to him, who'd been watching the transaction with great interest, looked at the powder with a puzzled face. The sort of look Rick imagined he wore when someone asked him how many fingers he had. 

“Dude, that coke is a weird colour, you sure this guy's legit?” he asked Simon. 

“Relax, man, Ricky here is a wiz kid in the lab, he makes the best shit this side of the city.” He said offering the wrap to his neandethal friend.

Just as Rick was turning to leave he yelled after him “Hey, why don't you stay for a drink with the boys Ricky?”

“I'm good” Rick called back bluntly, heading out of the crowded house, but just as he reached the door a violent cackle reached his ears, drawing his attention to the room on his right. The source of the offending noise came from the most beautiful creature he's ever laid eyes on. Maybe he could stay for one drink then.

As he approached, he drank her in. Her face was all angles - high cheekbones and a pointy little chin - with deep red hair that was cropped short, effortlessly messy like Rick's own dark brown tufts. Her sharp, cat-like green eyes scrunched up in laughter, thick with black eyeliner. She was probably quite tall when she stood, but right now she was reclining back into the corner of a couch watching the party unfold around her. Rick scanned her body like predator eyeing up its prey, she was slim but shapely, her breast filling her tight t-shirt pleasingly and figure hugging flairs clung to her thighs.

Grabbing a bottle of rum from a side table as he passed, he flopped down next to her while taking a swig. She turned her head to look at him, scrutinising from under her long lashes. 

Rick shook the bottle in her direction. “Refill?” She reached out her plastic cup wordlessly. “Rick” he offered, “Alice” she replied, a slight smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. 

“Very nice to meet you,” He said smoothly, she said nothing, merely watching him like he was a specimen in under a microscope. But Rick refused to be intimidated and stared right back. 

“Don't- don't say much do you?” He said.

“I'm just working out if you're worth talking to,” She said, an amused look creeping onto her face. Her voice was rich and slightly gravelly, and just a captivating as her appearance. 

“Ouch” Rick replied with a laugh, “Well that's ok, I'll just talk and then you can tell me if I'm worthy of your attention.”

“Sounds fair,” She laughed. Rick proceeded to tell her all the superficial details of his life. He was a scientist, left school at 15 because really what was the point? He lived alone on the outskirts of town, he was going to do great things with his life here on Earth, before abandoning it in search of a more exciting time. 

“You're very sure of yourself aren't you,” Alice said draining her cup and holding it out to Rick for a refill. 

“When you're the smartest person you know, you're kind of allowed to be sure of yourself.” He replied, topping her up. “What about you?”

“Well clearly I'm not as clever as you,” She said in a mock-serious tone, “But I _am_ an artist, well I'm trying to be. I graduate high school this year, then I'll get a dead end job to pay the rent and see how long I can kid myself into believing I'm an undiscovered talent just waiting for their big break.” She said with a broad smile. 

“A pessimist, I like it,” Rick said, clinking his bottle to her cup in a toast, then taking a big swig. 

“No, just a realist. I don't really care what I do with my life as long as I have fun while I do it,” she said with a shrug. Alice looked at him intently as though trying to decide whether to say what she was thinking. Apparently, she found what she was looking for.

“In the grand scheme of things my life will be short and unimportant, tomorrow I could be hit by a bus because if there's one thing I know it's that the universe doesn't give two shits about us. It doesn't care that I've got an exhibition coming up, or that I'm just a few month away from graduating with my whole life in front of me. The universe is just fine with snuffling my life out like a candle, and the world will go on turning. My life is meaningless, but I'm ok with that, and if I died tomorrow I'd be ok with that too, you know why? Because I came out tonight and laughed with my friends, and got drunk and danced, and met a strange man who's going to spend his days travelling the cosmos. Today I lived, even if tomorrow I don't”

Rick was silent for a while, digesting everything she'd said.

“Y-y-you've just levelled up from 'hot chick at a party' to the best person I've ever met,” He said seriously. 

She burst out into that cackling laugh again and Rick let it wash over him, watching the way the corners of her mouth creased and her nose crinkled up. 

“Yeh, suuuuure I am. I bet you say that to all the girls. Speaking of which,” She reached out and grabbed a passing girl, pulling her down onto the sofa between them. “This is Diane, she's a scientist too, you should talk to her while I visit the ladies room.” She stood, a little unsteady on her feet, gave them both a wink, then tottered off into the hall. Although he wouldn't admit it out loud, Rick felt a little emptier now what she's gone, and he silently decided he preferred the world with her in it.

He turned to his new sofa companion. Diane was your typical hot blonde, all ass, tits, and lips. Conventionally attractive but not Rick's cup of tea if he was honest. She was quiet and modest, hopefully off to Michigan to study biology, your typical 'slightly above average' small town aspirations. She was nice enough, and clearly into him, but somewhere along the way Rick had switched off, he was too busy thinking about Alice, sipping slowly from his bottle. 

Apparently, Diane was still talking “-so yeh, I suppose biomedical research would be the best-”

“Yeh, whatever kid, y-y-you're friends been a long time in the bathroom, hasn't she?” Rick was scanning the room for any sign of the captivating Alice. 

“Oh, right, yeh, she's probably out back smoking, but I'm-”

“Hmm, sure, nice to meet you too.” He cut her off and stood up to go searching.

Stepping out into the smokey back yard he squinted through the smog trying the spot her when a shock of red hair caught his eye. Alice was leaning against the wall, trying in vain to get her cigarette to light. Coming up behind her he reached over her shoulder, sparking her up with his own lighter. She jumped at his sudden presence. 

“Thought you could get away from me, huh?” Rick smiled.

“Aren't you a little old to be chatting up girls at a high school keg party?” she retorted, taking a drag from her cigarette and exhaling a plume of smoke into the cold January air. 

“Age and propriety are just social constructs designed to keep the population under control. We're both human beings capable of conscious thought, therefore we're capable of enjoying each other's company at a kickass party” He plucked the cigarette from her fingers and took a drag himself. 

She smiled up at him and her eyes flickered to his mouth. “Well, you've just gone from hot guy at a party to the best person I've ever met,” She said with a husky chuckle. 

He dropped the half finished cigarette on the ground and reached over to tuck her short messy hair behind her ear. 

“Is that so?” He quipped, leaning down, his lips just centimetres from hers-

.

\----------

.

Rick lurched awake from his dream, sweat drenching his shirt, breathing hard. He dragged his hand up his face and into his damp hair. He hadn't relived that moment in years. Oh, this was very, very bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided that Rick stuttered less when he was younger, I dunno, it just seemed right when I wrote the chapter. Also, I'm in my mid-20s and have never left Europe, so all of my knowledge of America in the 1970s came from google, so I'm sorry if I got anything blindingly wrong! I tried not to be too specific just in case haha.


	5. It's Sort Of An Unspoken Rule That Things Will Not Turn Out The Way You Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly thought I'd never get this chapter up, I found it soooo difficult to write, but hopefully, it's not too bad! 
> 
> The chapter title is from [So What Now by The Shins](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7-DjDF1MRM) . This song really helped me get the tone of the chapter right which is what I was struggling with, so give it a listen if you get the chance, it's really good :)
> 
> Also, I'd like to thank all the people how have read, commented, and given kudos so far, I can't tell you how much it means. You guys gave me the confidence to keep writing this, so I hope it doesn't disappoint.

The windows of Room 349 at the 'E- _zzz_ -Y Motel' rattled as another huge truck thundered past. Alice's eye twitched in annoyance. She leant up from where she was laying face down on the musty bed sheets and turned the music that was blaring out of her phone up a couple of notches, then flopped her face back onto the pillow. This was where she'd spent the last week and a half, mostly in this position, drunk, waiting for Rick to call. Today was the last day she was going to wait, if she didn't hear anything by 7 am tomorrow, she'd be gone. As David Bowie's [Moonage Daydream](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zaBCbXUkeU) wormed its way into her ears she ran through the events at the Smith household for what seemed like the nine hundredth time. She groaned into the pillow, it had been a fool's errand. What had she been thinking? She'd been so blinded by her eagerness to find Rick, that she hadn't stopped to think that maybe the reception she'd receive wouldn't necessarily be a warm one. 

But as always, hindsight is 20/20. It's not like she wasn't warned. Everyone she asked had said the same thing to her, 'Be careful, he's dangerous', but she'd ignored them. Oh, the stories she'd heard, Rick Sanchez left a trail of death, destruction, and carnage behind him, but in her naivety, she hadn't been deterred. Being held against your will and experimented on by fourth-dimensional creatures tended to give you a sort of fearlessness. Or stupidity, Alice thought bitterly. She thought she knew Rick better than _anyone_ , but that was childish bullshit and she'd always known it.

It became clear to her that when he finally got to travel the cosmos, Rick had followed his own set of rules, and flashing his name around could get you into some pretty hot water. However, against the odds, she had found 'her Rick', but in the end, it hadn't mattered. She'd come all this way, for nothing.

Alice flopped onto her back, the buzz of inebriation was starting to wear off. Swinging her legs off the bed she made her way over to the tiny desk, littered with empty bottles. Apparently, she'd drunk the lot, fuck. She decided a hot shower would have to do until she could be bothered to drag herself out the door later to pick up some take out. She checked her phone one last time before heading into the minuscule en suite. God, she was glad she didn't have one of these things when she was a kid, she would have been glued to it, waiting for people to call her. Growing up in the 60s you had to go out and make your own fun.

Shutting the door she slowly started to strip off her t-shirt, skinny jeans – those things were so frigging uncomfortable, but according to the dim-witted sales assistant, flares were no longer 'in'. She turned to look in the full-length mirror attached to the bathroom door, whoever thought it was a good idea to put _that_ there was clearly a sadist. Alice barely recognised the reflection staring back at her. Where there used to be slender curves and a slight layer of puppy fat, there were only sharp angles. Her hips and ribs jutted out, casting shadows against her sallow skin. She looked undernourished and overwrought. Removing her underwear she continued her self-reflective study. She'd never been bothered about the way she looked, not concerned with the hang up the rest of the girls seemed to have, life was too short to spend time worrying about something so pointless, maybe because she'd always been told she was attractive. It wasn't even that she was self-conscious now, she just felt strange in her body, like it didn't belong to her, she was somehow detached. 

The only thing that really bothered her was the scars. Though not obvious at first, if you looked closely, you could see the large Y-shaped autopsy scar, a fine raised white line stretching across her shoulders, and down her torso, almost to her pubic bone. When she turned her back to switch on the water the mirror reflected the strange circular brand mark, about the size of her palm, printed just underneath her left shoulder blade. These were the reminders of what she'd been through, what she'd suffered at the 'hands' of those inhuman beings.

Alice climbed into the shower and let the hot water cascade over her tired body. Despite everything that had happened she has decided a long time ago she wouldn't let any of this get to her, she was the most bloody-minded person she knew and she wasn't going to let her near decade in captivity be the ruin of her, she just wouldn't. Bad things happened to people all the time, she'd always believed life was an indifferent bitch, and this had only proven it to her.

As she squeezed shower gel onto her sponge, her mind wandered back to Rick. She didn't really know what she had been expecting, him to sweep her off her feet in an embrace? No, not his style. But who knows? It was so hard to remember how they used to be together. Over the years her memory had fogged more and more, only random little snapshots remained clear in her mind, and it felt more distant now than ever. At least she'd learnt a little of what had become of him after she'd gone. She smiled to herself, 'Intergalactic Terrorist', he must have known she would have been proud.

After about 10 minutes of standing under the water, it began to run lukewarm. Climbing out of the shower cubical, she was careful not to look in the mirror as she dried off. Coming out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel she wandered over to the bed where Bowie was still singing his heart out through the speaker of her phone. Just as she reached for it, it gave a buzz, the screen lighting up with a text from an unfamiliar number. 

_916-555-0106  
-Come for dinner tonight, 8 pm – Summer_

Then a couple of seconds later.

_916-555-0106  
-Rick is fine with it by the way._

Alice felt her stomach flip over and her heart start to pound. Maybe things were starting to look up after all. 

.

\---------- 

.

Morty stared out of the ship's window as he and Rick rattled their way through the asteroid belt between Jupiter and Mars. He was completely lost in thought, not a regular occurrence for him, but it had been known to happen. He hated lying Rick, mostly because in the end he'll just find out anyway and Morty would only suffer more. Ever since his Grandfather escaped from the Federation prison over a year and a half ago, he had been much more suspicious of... well everyone. While he knew Rick trusted him, he also knew he'd never consciously let Morty close enough to hurt him. But Morty knew him better than he thought, and this was for his own good. 

He'd been so caught up in his own thoughts he hadn't realised they were home until they bumped down in the driveway. When Rick didn't move to leap out of the car Morty started to sweat, maybe he knew already, maybe he was going to start yelling about what an awful Grandson he was, maybe-

“Morty – Morty, you've been really quiet, it's starting to creep me out a bit, y-y-you – it's not like you're thinking about anything important, so either you've zoned out again o-o-or you're sulking, so come on, wh-what is it?”

“Oh, erm, y-you know, I'm - jeez Rick I could be thinking, about anything, you don't – you don't know what-what's going on in my head.”

“Probably not a lot, le-let's be honest here, Morty.” Rick arched an eyebrow. “But seriously, Morty if it's about using you as bait for those Jurapsian foot soldiers, I wasn't actually going to leave you there. I-i-i-it was all part of the plan Morty!” Rick implored

“No, Rick, everything is fine. We – we better get inside, Mom's expecting us for dinner and i-i-it's already gone 8.” Morty muttered. He opened his door and climbed down, hearing Rick do the same round the other side. Good, at least he wasn't going to have to fight to get him in the house. Morty's stomach was tying itself in knots, and as he reached the door that led from the garage to the kitchen, he heard faint strains of laughter, she must already be here. As he opened the door everyone inside went quite. Behind him, Rick seemed not to notice and pushed passed him heading for the dining room. 

“S-smells amazing, Sweetie, what are we-” He froze in the doorway and Morty saw the muscles in his back tense up under his lab coat. 

“Dad, Morty, we have a dinner guest!” Beth said with a nervous laugh. Morty came up to stand next to Rick in the doorway and surveyed the scene. His Dad was sat at the end of the table, some of his casts had been removed so he could feed himself now. His Mom at the other end, with his sister and Alice at the back side near the window. Morty turned to look up at Rick and found his staring down at him with a murderous look. 

“You knew, didn't you,” Rick said quietly

Morty said nothing, merely bowed his head and went to sit opposite his sister. Rick dithered in the doorway, seemingly weighing up with to sit down, portal out of there, or just murder them all and have done with it. He looked at the table, enchiladas, his favourite. 'Beth you manipulative bitch' he thought to himself, he was almost proud. Almost.

Hunger won out, and he wrenched the chair out from under the table, trust Morty to leave him the seat opposite Alice, he was going to pay for this. He looked across at Summer's smug expression, she would be paying too. 

“Well come on everybody, dig in!” Beth called with a somewhat panicked air. 

The dinner was a tense affair, not helped in the slightest by Jerry discussing all the various items the doctors had found when they took off his arm casts. Nine straws, four spoons, a butter knife, six pencils, and the remote for the DVD player. Alice was the picture of calm, although she kept glancing up at Rick who was resolutely not looking up from his plate, save to shoot angry glances at his family. After no time at all, he was dabbing his mouth with his napkin and walking out of the room towards the garage without a word. Alice immediately rounded on Summer. 

“I thought you said he was fine with it, it looked like he didn't even know!” She exclaimed. 

“I just thought if he saw you again you two could talk! You know, like 'The Parent Trap' or whatever. I didn't think he'd be so stubborn about this!” Summer said miserably. 

Alice gave her an incredulous look. “How long have you known him?”

Summer looked grim, “Ok, point taken.” 

Alice turned to Beth who was looking defeated. “This was a lovely meal Mrs Smith, honestly, I'm sorry it didn't go quite how you all planned. But if Rick is anything like he was when I knew him, you can't do much to force his hand.”

“No, you're right,” Beth sighed “I'm sorry we brought you into all this, I just thought it would, I don't know, cheer him up? Maybe help him reconnect a little.”

Alice smiled, and as she stood, reached out and squeezed Beth's shoulder. “I should go.”

She turned and headed out of the house, resigned to the fact this was the last time she'd see Rick or his well-meaning yet naïve family again. As she let the front door close behind her she heard the Smiths erupt into an argument. Maybe it was a good thing. 

She was just crossing the lawn heading for her car when the light streaming out the of garage caught her eye. She hesitated, what's the worst that could happen?

.

\---------- 

.

Rick was angrily trying to calibrate his Quantum Defron Charger, to little avail. This work needed a delicate, steady hand, not one shaking with barely suppressed rage. He had thought, foolishly it seemed, that his family had dropped the issue entirely. He didn't _want_ to engage with that part of himself that was screaming for him to let it happen, let him open up and explore a new relationship – in any form – with Alice. No, the rest of him was beating that part to a pulp out back, and all his family had succeeded in doing was fanning the flames of the struggle. He had resigned himself to living without her, to not knowing what had happened, and he didn't know how to do the opposite anymore. And what if it didn't work out? What if they were too different from each other now, they couldn't be friends because he'd become some old codger, because they were now technically generations apart. Then she'd leave. And as cold and unfeeling as professed to be, he didn't think he could stand losing her all over again. It would be the ultimate failure. In any case, he wasn't very good at _'friends'_.

He flung his screwdriver onto the work bench and slumped down in his chair reaching out for the bottle of vodka in the bottom cupboard. Hearing a small cough behind him he sighed, taking a long swig. 

“Get out, Morty, I'm busy”

“I can see that” Alice replied.

Rick turned his spinny chair to look at her leaning against the entrance to the garage. 

“Oh, it's _you_ ,” he said dismissively “Well the same applies, piss – piss off, I-I-I'm busy.” He spun back around.

Alice pushed off the wall with one of her boot-clad feet and sauntered over to him. She plucked the bottle from his hand, taking a large gulp she leant back against the workbench. 

Rick's jaw clenched in annoyance, and they entered into a fierce staring competition. Rick cracked first. “Ju-just answer me this, why are you doing this? Wha-wh-what's your end game here? I'm guessing this isn't the reaction you were hoping for, I'm sure you wanted, what? Open arms? Candle lit dinner? A parade?” Rick snatched the bottle back from her. 

“You sound like you don't know me at all,” Alice said with a small smile.

“You right! Hit – hit the nail on the head there. I _don't_ know you. Y-you – I knew you for about two minutes in my early twenties, y-y-you've been gone for _forty_ years. Why would I want to get all chummy again? That ship has _sailed_ , Sista!” 

Alice stared at him, shocked “I have no one, Rick, _no one_. My parents are dead, I've been dropped in a decade I barely understand, apparently, in a dimension I wasn't even born in. I'm legally dead for christ sake. I came here because you are the only one that would understand. You were there, you saw what happened. I thought you were the only one smart enough not to freak the fuck out, but apparently not.” She tried to reclaim the vodka but Rick kept it out of her reach.

“Wh-what do you want from me? You want me to tell you it'll all be ok? That i-i-it all happened for a reason? Want me to hold your hand while you cry about your dead family?” Rick leant back in his seat and put his feet up on the desk. “Sorry to disappoint you, Baby, but that ain't gonna happen.”

“You know what, this is fucking pointless, you're right I shouldn't have come. I thought I'd come here and find _my_ Rick, but you-”

Rick flung the vodka bottle hard onto the floor sending shards of glass flying in all directions. He stood up abruptly, looming over her.

“I'm not _your Rick_ ,” He spat, “I never was! I-I-I-I can't do that! Why won't you just leave me the fuck alone?” He shouted into her face. Not willing to be outdone Alice brought herself up to here full height and glared up at him.

“Why? Why can't you? What? Are you afraid? Afraid to actually connect with someone instead of just using them? Never thought I'd see the day that Rick Sanchez became a fucking pussy!” She retorted

“Because I couldn't save you!” Rick roared.

Alice's shock was echoed back at her in Rick's face, he clearly wasn't expecting himself to have that outburst either. He backed away sitting down hard in his chair then resting his elbows on the desk and his head in his hands. 

“Jesus, Rick are you fucking kidding me?” She said, with a disbelieving frown on her face.

Rick seemed not to hear her, and the floodgates opened “That was the first time, the _first time_ , I realised the universe didn't care. Sure I talked big, like I was some wise, mystical being with higher knowledge. No. I was a kid, talking out of his ass, so wrapped up in how unique and special he was, telling everyone how unimportant they were, he never stopped think that it applied to him too.” He spat this vitriol into the desk, not daring to look at Alice. 

“But you, you saw through all my bullshit, you know, m-most – most people can't tell profound truth from complete nonsense, but you could! You were the first person who didn't just idolise me for being clever, you challenged me. You filled a void I-I didn't even know existed, then you were ripped away from me. How – how is that fair? I-I-I – You were never meant to be special.” The 'But you were' was let unsaid, she knew. Rick finally looked up at Alice, his brow drawn up in pain. 

Alice raised an eyebrow, giving him a small knowing smile. “No, Rick, I wasn't, and I'm not. What did you once say to me? 'Love is just a chemical reaction'. And your right. The feeling produced by that chemical reaction is made more powerful by shared experience. The connection is strengthened, the affection simply grows over time*. It's not special, human beings fall in love every day Rick, it's only you that finds the concept so alien.”

Rick growled in frustration “R-re-re-regardless, it happened. I gave in to the herd animal instinct and – and it turned round to bite me in the ass. But the fact remains I should have done something,” He looked down forlornly at the shattered glass and puddle of spirit. “You didn't deserve to have your life taken away” He whispered.

“Hey!” Alice called, “You don't get to feel guilty about that, ok? You have no right to feel guilty. There was nothing you could have done! All this – this traumatic shit that happens in people's lives, we get to choose how we react to it. And I choose not care. If I hadn't been taken then you wouldn't have gone off with Diane – which we still need to talk about by the way -” 

Rick gave a slight smirked “Jealous?” 

“In your dreams” Alice shot back with a smile. “My point is if none of that had happened, you wouldn't be here, you wouldn't have Beth or Summer or Morty.” She leant her head down in a conspiratory fashion. “So fucking what if you lost the best person you've ever met” She gave him a wink “The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry”

Rick shook off his miserable air just as quickly as it arose. “I haven't missed y-your arty-farty bullshit”

Alice laughed her cackling laugh, then looked down at him, feeling almost shy all of a sudden. 

“So now what?” She said

“Well, I mean, I suppose it wouldn't be an entirely bad thing, i-i-if, you know, you stopped by every once in a while” His cocky facade was firmly in place, but his wariness still crept through. 

“Hmm, maybe, I'll have to check my scheduled.” She said mockingly.

Rick rolled his eyes and waved her away with his hand. “Ok, I just got bored, leave now”

Alice laughed again, pushed herself off the counter and headed for the garage door, but before she got too far, Rick reached out and grabbed her hand. The contact made her jump, and electric heat spreading up her arm and through her body, making her shiver. 

“You've still not special, know that right?” He said, studying her.

She looked back with scrutinising eyes. “Yeh, I know.” With that she was out the door and away into the night. 

Rick leant back in his chair and indulged in a wide smile, he would certainly live to regret this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * I legit stole this line from [If I Didn't Have You by Tim Minchin](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zn6gV2sdl38) I literally couldn't say it better myself, so all credit goes to him there!


	6. Emotionally Spin Me, Til None Of Our Planets Could Align, But I Could Stand You One More Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like the last chapter, this took a little longer write than I intended, sorry! Hopefully, the next one will be up a little sooner :)
> 
> Chapter title from [I Like Us Better When We're Wasted by Tiësto](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eApJGC02dA)

A bright, white, burning light scorched Alice's retinas. She tried in vain to close her eyes but her eyelids seemed to be fighting against some immovable force. She looked around, but all she could see was white. It was at that point she noticed that the only thing she _could_ move were her eyeballs. Panic started to creep into her veins, like water leaking into the hull of a ship, inching it's way further and further up until it pulled her down into its icy depths. She knew this feeling, she'd felt it before, many times, but where - she wasn't sure. That was until she spotted movement in her peripheral vision. Something dark catching her eye. Long thin wisps, like fingers but less solid. They were on all sides, approaching her then scattering, and coming to rest light as feathers on the surface of her body.

Then she heard them, not so much heard them, but sensed that the beings were communicating around her. They had no distinct voice or language but it was somehow clear to her that they were talking. Realisation began to dawn, she knew, she knew where she was, no, no, no, not again! She tried to scream but no sound came out, and then they began to make that noise, that terrible, screeching, burrowing, heaving sound, and Alice felt like all her blood was been sucked out. And the pain, sharp and biting, like she was being ripped apart. Maybe she was. She felt empty like her soul was missing. Then she saw it, two bright blue glowing pinpricks in the mass of swirling, inky, tendrils, and in the middle of it all was a red, dripping, still beating heart. Bang, bang, bang. Her beating heart. 

.

\----------

.

Alice jerked upright in bed screaming herself hoarse. Bang, bang, bang. She heaved in oxygen, shaking hands running all over her body. She was all there, she was safe, she was whole. Bang, bang, bang. Her eyes darted around the room, what the hell was that. Bang, bang, bang, BANG! She blinked slowly as she came back to reality. Oh shit, it's the door! Leaping out of bed she ran to the peep hole and saw the magnified version and a very tired and irritated looking motel employee. 

“Yo! Whatever you're doing in there you better quit it or I'm gonna have to call the cops!” He yelled.

Alice flung the door open, “Oh god, I'm so sorry, please don't call the police!” she begged.

The guy standing on the other side couldn't have been more than eighteen, and his eyes grew wide in his acne riddled face as they scanned down Alice's scantily clad body. She hadn't really thought about the possibility of being perved on when she'd answered the door in nothing but a large t-shirt. She pulled on the hem violently trying to cover herself, which sparked the boy to return his attention to her face. 

He coughed “Well... Ma'ma, we had some noise complaints from the rooms next to yours. If you're going to do kinky sex stuff in there you're gonna have to keep it down.”

Alice blinked in shock, “What the fuck? I'm not doing kinky sex stuff!”

The boy gave her a lewd smile, “Do you want to?” He snickered. 

Alice raised an eyebrow, looking down her nose at him, she was about a foot taller than him. 

“In your dreams, short stuff.” She dead-panned, and with that, she slammed the door in his creepy little face. 

“Well, I'll be in reception if you change your mind!” He yelled through the door.

She heaved a sigh of relief and leant back against it. She was all there, she was safe, she was whole. She wandered back over to the bed and sat on the edge, glancing at the clock. Fuck, it was only 1.16am. She knew for a fact she wouldn't get back to sleep now, at least not sober anyway. She looked back at the warm bed mournfully. She'd love it if she could just sleep for one night, just one night, then maybe she wouldn't feel so much like an extra in 'Night Of The Living Dead'. 

Flicking on the light she decided the only thing she could do was head out and find a liqueur store still open at this time. She pulled on her jeans and swapped her oversized t-shirt for a white vest and black leather jacket. After zipping up her boots she was heading out of the door into the bitterly cold night, being careful to go in the opposite direction to the reception building. 

Cars still trundled past, despite the lateness of the hour, and her hopes of finding on open shop were high. In the time she'd been gone, Earth had certainly become a 24-hour society. Crossing the road under the sickly orange street lights, she saw a red neon sign up ahead, blinking '24/7' on and off. Pulling her collar up she put her head down in made a beeline for it. 

She was so focused on getting inside and getting her hands on some liquid sleep aid that she didn't notice the person coming out of the door as she went through it, causing her to crash head first into the person's chest and bounce backwards onto the frozen ground. 

“What the fuck are you- Oh, ...Hiiiii” A gruff voice said with rising inflection.

Alice looked up to find herself meeting the wild eyes of Rick Sanchez. She gasped slightly, he looked quite ethereal standing there, in a demonic kind of way, the red glowing sign of the shop haloing his spiky grey-blue hair. Rick narrowed his eyes at her. 

“Wh-wh-what's wrong? Did – did I just knock what little cognitive power you possess on to the sidewalk?” He asked with a look that said he thought that was indeed a possibility.

“I... I... I didn't expect to see you here.” Alice stammered, caught completely off guard by his sudden appearance. 

“Yeh? Well, I'm quite – quite the man about town” she said sarcastically, “The guy in here owes me a favour. Gives me alcohol on – on the cheap.” His large paper bag clinked as he shifted it in his arms so he could reach out a hand to Alice, pulling her up off the ground with surprising strength. 

“What – what are – where are you off to this time of night?” He asked nonchalantly, but with the slightly confused facial expression of someone who was not in the habit of making small talk. 

“I was about to get some supplies myself” she replied, she had that weird shy feeling again, she was never shy, especially not around Rick.

“Nothing says sane and stable like drinking alone, am I right?” He said with a wink. Alice laughed, her distinctive cackle blooming in her throat. 

“I suppose you're right,” Her mind flickered back to her nightmare. “I don't... Sleep well.” She admitted awkwardly.

Rick frowned “Yeh, I can – I get that.” He looked down at the bulging bag of adult beverages in his arms. “Well you know, I-I-I could always use some help getting through all this.”

Alice smiled wickedly “Yeh alright then, you're on.” It was the first time she'd seen him since their conversation in the garage and she was eager to spend more time with him. 

Rick gave her a smile of his own and turn on his heel without another word. As always he simply expected people to follow. With lab coat wafted behind him in the breeze like a cape, he continued their conversations, not even bothering to check if she was following. Of course she was. 

“Just – just to cl _AAAR_ ify, I'm perfectly capable of drinking all this on my own.” He said smugly.

“You just wanted the company?” Alice said innocently, jogging slightly to keep level with him. 

Rick smugness drained from his face, and he shoved into her lightly with his shoulder. 

“Don't get cocky, Montgomery.” He scowled. Alice simply laughed, noticing the hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. 

After a couple of minutes, they rounded the corner of an empty parking lot at the back of a large superstore. Parked haphazardly in the middle was Rick's ramshackle space car. 

“You aren't seriously expecting me to get in that are you?” Alice said warily.

“Come on, wh-wh-where's your sense of ad-adventure?” Rick asked, raising his free arm. When she didn't immediately jump at the chance to climb aboard his tumbledown vehicle, he let the arm fall back to his side. “Whatever, it's y _OOOOUUR_ r loss, but the booze is come with me, so...” He shrugged and pulled the driver's side door open, climbed up and dropped the bag between the front seats. 

Alice hesitated, but when the engine started she had the undeniable urge not to be left behind. Leaping forward she rushed to open the passenger door clambering up into the seat just as Rick began to take off. She sat back rigidly in the seat, eyes glued to the rapidly diminishing earth as she fumbled with her seatbelt. This wasn't the first time she'd been in a spaceship, but this was the most... 'arts and crafts' version she'd experienced.

A can of beer was thrust in front of her vision. She turned to look at Rick who was taking a swig from his own. 

“Drinking and driving, your sense of adventure's verging on the suicidal I see,” She said lightly taking the proffered can and cracking it open.

Rick clinked his own can to hers and gave her a wink. “You better believe it, Baby”.

.

\----------

.

Although the ride had started off rather turbulent, ducking and diving around asteroids and comets, as time went on, everything seemed to smooth out. Although that could have been attributed to the pair's ever increasing state of inebriation. When they finally touched down at their destination, Alice was enjoying the warm glow that usually appeared at the bottom of her third can of beer. 

Their journey had been near silent, Rick giving no clue as to where they were headed, and the theme continued as he wordlessly picked up the bag of loot and exited the car. Alice followed suit, dropping down onto thick, greenish-blue grass that came all the way up to her knees. It was almost pitch-black outside but she could just about make out that they were at the bottom of a hill, a hill which Rick had already started to climb. Not wanting to be abandoned on a strange alien world, Alice set off chasing after him, catching up just as they crested the hill.

“Are you going to tell-” She began, but was cut short by the sight that met her eyes.

They were standing on an impossibly high cliff. About 50 meters in front of them the tall grass simply fell away into the inky purple sky. Alice didn't think she'd seen that many stars in her entire life. The sky was awash with tiny pinpricks of light, forming swirling, winding patterns, and in the middle of it all were two great moons, far, far bigger than the Earth's moon. It was as though you could reach out and touch them if you tried hard enough. As she approached the edge, and gingerly looked down she felt a warm wind rush up and buffet against her. A strange sepia coloured sea was crashing about below them, illuminated by the moons. Unlike a 'normal' sea, whose waves crashed against the shoreline, this seemed to part in the middle, the two side drawing away from each other biblically, before slamming back together just to separate all over again. And in the midst of it all, huge six finned whale-like creatures were jumping and playing in the strange tides. It was one of the most beautiful things she'd ever seen. 

Rick meanwhile, had flopped down onto the grass a few meters back, his long thin legs sticking out in front of him, and started to set up camp, arranging his various bottles of spirits around him. Satisfied with their composition, he leant back onto his elbow and enjoyed a view of his own. Alice stood on the cliff's edge, silhouetted in sharp contrast to the glowing purple sky. Her short red hair swept sideways in the breeze caught the soft light of the giant moons. She closed her eyes and raised her arms out to the sides, her jacket riding up a little, showing the pale skin of her lower back. She looked like she would either fall back into the soft grass or fall forward into the watery oblivion below, either way, Rick was powerless to stop it. That's how she made him feel, powerless, and he both loved and loathed it. His eyes raked down her back as he revelled in his powerlessness, and thought it was one of the most beautiful things he'd ever seen.

.

\----------

.

Their silence had continued for another hour, sat side by side in a little hollow they'd made in the springy grass, watching the whales jump between the tides, working their way steadily through a bottle of rum. Alice kept stealing sideways glances at Rick. The iridescent light of the moons highlighted the lines on his face. He didn't look bad for his age by any means, it was the same face, same keen eyes, same fleeting smile, just more weathered. Lines formed at the corners of his eyes and mouth, and traversed his forehead. He was a bit thinner than he was, and his long-fingered hands were bonier. But the biggest change was his hair, unruly tufts of dark brown had been replaced with a wild blue-grey mess, sticking up at all angles. Not to mention the little bald patch at the back, with made her giggle internally. He was different yes, but not bad looking at all, a realisation which puzzled her ever so slightly, she'd never been into old men, _older_ maybe but not _old_ old. But she felt inclined to make an exception, it was Rick after all.

It had reached the point in the evening where she could no longer hold back her questions, as much as it pained her to break the comfortable silence. 

“Soooo... Diane?” She asked quietly, passing him back the bottle after taking her swig. 

“Euugh. I-I-I-I was wondering when you'd bring that up.” he rolled his eyes then belched loudly. 

“You have to understand my confusion, you hated her!” Said Alice

“Hate – hate is a strong – I didn't hate her, I-I-I just found her annoying, but I find everyone annoying.”

“Even me?” She asked innocently.

“Increasingly” He grumbled, prompting another of those raucous laughs to echo off the surrounding cliffs. 

Alice's hopes of getting an answer hadn't been high, what had happened when she'd disappeared was technically none of her business. She was about to drop the issue, and chalk in down as one of those mysteries one was never destined to solve when the answer was given freely.

“Sh-she – she was the only one that understood.” Rick said quietly.

Alice daren't look at him for fear of scaring the answer away “Understood what?”

“What it was like to lose you.” His voice betrayed no emotion, it was merely a statement of fact. 

He continued “But mutual loss isn't enough to hold a marriage together. E-e-eventually the lack of common ground starts to eat away at you, you know? S-so I left. She might have resented me at the time, but it was better to spoil her year then ruin the rest of her life. N-not a wholly selfless act I'll admit, but the th _OOOUUGH_ t was there.” He finished with a long drag on the bottle. 

“What happened to her? I tried to find her but-”

“She died.” He said bluntly, “About nine years ago.” He offered no more explanation than that. 

Screwing the lid back onto the rum bottle Rick suddenly sprang to his feet in an offensively spry manner.

“Well, now you've successfully ruined the mood, why don't we liven things up a little?” 

Alice staggered up to stand beside him as he pulled his portal gun out from his pocket and shot a swirling lime green maelstrom into the space beside them. 

“Let's go get riggety riggety wrecked, son!” He grabbed Alice by the shoulders and push her toward the portal, pausing to get in close and whisper into her ear, “Don't worry, I'll be right behind you,” before shoving her through. 

Alice felt as though she was stepping through a wall of jello, however, she barely had time to contemplate just how gross it was before the new atmosphere consumed her. It was hot and sticky and crowded. Weird bass heavy music pounded in her ears as she looked around at the other patrons. Rick had brought her to a bar, and an alien bar at that. Suddenly Rick was behind her again and the glow of green faded, only to be replaced with flashing strobe lighting. 

Being too loud to hold a conversation, probably a tactical move on Rick's part, he gestured over to the bar, gripping her by the hand and dragging her through the myriad of grinding bodies and flailing limbs. The bar was a smooth sweeping curve of purple marble and behind it stood three stressed looking bartenders. All three had glowing yellowish skin, probably picked for the job due to their four sets of arms and nine eyes. Rick communicated something to the closest one, who winked a couple of its eyes at him in response, then processed to line up six shot glasses with one of its arms and fill them with a thick looking dark red liquid. Rick slipped a couple of purple notes over the bar and downed his first shot. 

He turned to Alice “Careful, i-i-it's a lot stronger than on Earth” he shouted into her ear. She simply raised an eyebrow and downed all three in quick succession. Rick offered her an impressed smile, finished his own and called for more. 

They continued like this for some time, sampling what seemed like most of the bar. As it turned out alcoholism was a shared hobby, although Alice was looking much more worse for wear than Rick, but then again he'd had more practice. Before he could call for another refill, Alice grabbed his arm and leant up to shout into his ear.

“Time to dance!” 

Rick felt the warmth of her hands through the fabric of his lab coat, enjoying it more than he probably should, but shook his head vehemently. He was in the mood to just keep drinking until he couldn't see straight or he ran out of money, one or the other, probably the latter. 

“What's the matter, old man, can't keep up?” She goaded. Rick opened his mouth to retort something clever and scathing, but before he could say a word she grabbed him by the shoulders, spun him round and shouted with a laugh in her voice, “Don't worry, I'll be right behind you!” 

They weaved their way through the crowd until Rick had had enough of being guided and spun round to grab her by the waist. He shouldn't be doing this, he shouldn't be this close, but her face split into an infectious grin as she lifted her arms above her head and started to move to the rhythm of the music under his hands, and he couldn't help but enjoy the feeling.

As she closed her eyes Rick took the opportunity to study her closely. She looked almost the same as she had on the day she'd disappeared, a little older perhaps but not much. She looked tired more than anything, exhausted, heavy dark circles under her eyes, and her cheeks had lost their glow. But she was still as captivating as ever. High cheek bones, big bright eyes, plump tempting lips. She was still beautiful. He scanned down her lithe body, twisting and turning to the music. She still had fantastic breasts, and he wasn't ashamed to admire them while she wasn't looking. Something far too close to desire tugged behind his navel and he allowed his thumbs sneak under her top and stroked the soft skin at her waist. She was still so young, and he suddenly felt very old, a feeling which had been creeping up on his more and more in recent weeks. Right, time to mix things up a little. His eyes scanned the room and spotted a tall, thin humanoid figure in the corner leaning against the wall, perfect. 

He was there and back before Alice even had time to register he'd gone, and when she opened her eyes he was holding what looked like a tiny bag of orange sugar in front of her face, his mouth forming a wicked grin and his eyes slightly manic. She watched as he opened the bag, licked the back of his hand, sprinkled some of the granules onto the streak of saliva, blow over it gently, then licked it all off his hand again. He closed his eyes and savoured the bitter taste, the feeling of pure fire already beginning to thrum through his veins. Repeating the process, he offered his powdered hand out to Alice, a challenge in his eyes, daring her to take it. He knew he was playing a dangerous game here, but he couldn't help but see how far he could push things. As always she wasn't phased. Holding his eye contract she bent her head slightly and licked the substance slowly off his hand. She smirked as she noticed his body shiver at the contact, prompting him to frown and give her the middle finger, slipping the drugs into his back pocket. 

Alice started to feel the effects immediately. Her blood was singing, she felt warm and fidgety, but most importantly she felt alive. She looked up to see Rick watching her closely and she felt the undeniable urge to touch him. Slinging her arms around his neck she began to move her hips to the heavy beat coming from the huge floor to ceiling speakers. They were close, so close they could feel each other's hot, damp breath on their faces. Rick slid his arms around her waist again and pulled her even closer, he stared into her eyes scrutinising her as her face flushed. It felt just like it always had; like no time had passed at all. They could be in a club in 1974, high off Rick's custom made cocaine, grinding against each other to Led Zeppelin. She was just about to lean up and press her lips to his when a huge furry hand clamped down on Ricks' shoulder, spinning him around. 

Rick looked as though he was about to obliterate whoever had disturbed him, reaching for his plasma pistol in his back pocket, when he recognised who it was, and pulled the individual into an embrace. This apparent friend of his looked giant rat wearing a waistcoat. Well, not so much looked like, it WAS a giant rat wearing a waistcoat. The creature shouted something into Ricks' ear and Alice saw two massive blue teeth protruding from its gums. It looked terrifying, but when it saw Alice staring it gave her what she imagined was a smile, and gestured to them both to follow it. Rick walked without looking back, their little close encounter from a moment ago seemed to have been completely forgotten. 

They entered through a velvet curtain at the back of the room, flanked with many-armed bouncers, and arrived in a plush red room. The rat creature turned to Alice and reached out a hand. 

“Rathbone Sourisson,” He said with a deep silky voice, “So glad you're enjoying my establishment.” 

An alien bar run by a giant talking rat, huh. It was like an adult 'Wind In The Willows'. In her highly inebriated state, all Alice could think to say was, “You're very tall.”

Rathbone gave a rumbling laugh. “Actually, my dear, I'm rather small for my kind. The people of Taarera Murinae are normally at least 9 feet tall, I'm a mere 6 and a half” He gave her another toothy grin “Still got the old poisonous gnashers though!” He turned to Rick who was helping himself to the contents of the small unmanned bar. Alice swayed slightly on the spot, before tottering over to sit on one of the high seats. 

“A drink for the lady?” Rathbone asked.

“She's had enough,” Rick said bluntly, not even bothering to look at her. His tone made Alice start, she hadn't been expecting that reaction after what had just happened, or nearly happened she supposed. She was about to protest that actually she was an adult and she knew her own limits when the room gave a horrifying lurk, and decided not to press the issue. 

Rick came round the bar, sitting next to Alice but turning his back to her and focusing on Rathbone. 

“Sorry Bony S, I-I-I didn't quite hear you on the dancefloor.” Rick leant back in his seat and took a swig from his new drink. 

“What I said, Old Chap, was you should be more careful out there,” Rathbone said raising his bushy eyebrows. 

“Oh come on! Fluxcust Dust is only a category 9 drug on this planet. You can't tell me you don't encourage deals in here, a-a-all those loose-lipped young things spending their hard earned cash at your bar. Plus it's not - not like you've never partaken yourself, am I right!” Rick replied with a laugh. 

Rathbones eyes widened. “No, no, no, Rick! I didn't mean the drugs, haven't you heard? About the Federation raids?”

Rick's brow furrowed, “Fed- What do you mean? The _Galactic_ federation?” Rick gave a chuckle, “Y-y-you don't have to worry about them anymore, let's – let's just say they've been disbanded.” He gave the rat a wink, but instead of looking reassured, Rathbone looked more alarmed than ever. 

“Oh my, oh my, Rick, you are out of the loop aren't you!” He leant in close, “Nobody's saying anything concrete at the moment, but there have been rumours for a while now. This group calling themselves The NRIF have been carrying out raids all over the galaxy. Some are saying it's just pirates attempting to look official, trying to trick naïve single planetary lifeforms into paying them safety money, but I smell the Federation all over this, and so do a lot of others.”

Rick looked grave, “Honestly? I doubt it's them, they couldn't have reformed so quickly, most of their armies were destroyed, and as far as I know they have no clear leader.”

“Well you know what they say, a Gromflomite will follow anyone with a clipboard.” Rathbone shrugged. 

Rick drained his drink. If this really was the Feds, Rathbone was right, he was losing his touch. He glanced back at Alice who had passed out on the bar. He knew this had been a mistake, he should never have allowed her to distract him. They'd been so close on that dancefloor he'd thought she was going to kiss him, he's _hoped_ she was going to kiss him. But that was a stupid and childish train of thought. He looked down at her peaceful sleeping face, at least he'd give her a good nights sleep for once. He closed his eyes and shook his head, if he was going to keep her around he had to keep focused, no more overly emotional, libido-fuelled, bar crawls. Rise above, he told himself, she's either a fling or a friend.

He turned back to Rathbone, “Well thanks for the he _EEEEAAAD_ s up, I'll look into it.”

Rathbone nodded shaking his hand. Rick jumped down from the stool and effortlessly lifted an unconscious Alice over his shoulder in a fireman's life and shot a portal back to the car. 

The journey back was quiet save for Alice's shallow breathing in the seat next to him. She didn't wake when they landed in the parking lot of her motel, so she couldn't ask how he knew where she was living; and she didn't wake when he laid her gently on the bed and covered her with the blankets, so he couldn't pretend she'd convinced him to stay. He backed out of the room quietly and closed the door, already feeling the fringes of a come down creeping up on him, he pulled the little packet of orange out of his pocket. 

“And so it continues” He signed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, it this was the classic Rick takes 'blank' to an alien bar chapter! Come on, there had to be at least one ;)


	7. Do Not Listen To A Word I Say, Just Listen To What I Can Keep Silent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Little Flashback

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm Back! I'm really very sorry for the absence. I had every intention of keeping to a regular upload schedule but things just got in the way, and I lost the confidence to continue writing this. But it was never abandoned, nor will it ever be, even if it takes forever (hopefully not!) I will finish this story! Just a short chapter to get back into the swing of things. Might not be amazing but it's a start. Thanks for reading. 
> 
> Chapter title from [This Is Yesterday by The Manic Street Preachers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TB8uJ5OpwvE)

_4th April 1973_

Rick heaved an exaggerated sigh from his recumbent position on the bed. 

“H-How long is this going to take?” He grumbled. He’d been lying still, artfully draped in the sheet for the best part of an hour; ever since Alice had returned from the bathroom and yelled “Don’t move!” and grabbed her sketch book. 

“I’m nearly done, I swear.” She muttered her eyes never leaving the page. 

Rick sighed again and resigned himself to a few more minutes of listening to the gentle scratch of graphite on paper. He glanced over to where his… Girlfriend? Was he really going to call her that? No, scrap that. To where _Alice_ was sitting in his desk chair at the end of the bed, one leg tucked under her, the other foot on the seat, propping the sketch book on her knee. Her hair was scruffy from sleep, but her thick black eyeliner was still perfectly placed; her brow was creased in concentration, but her mouth hung open slightly, lips moist; her upper half was clothed in one of Rick’s favourite orange shirts, but her bottom half was almost completely bare, save for a pair of black panties, just visible under the hem of the shirt. In short, she looked thoroughly fuckable and although he wouldn’t admit it, every time her eyes flicked up from the page to study his form his stomach would flutter. As much as it was an inconvenience to him right now, he loved watching her draw. Demonstration of talent had always turned him on.

With a final stroke of her pencil, Alice looked up and grinned. “Finished!”

“Finally!” Rick groaned, sitting up and stretching his arms over his head causing the sheet to slip down his naked torso and pool in his lap. “Well, come on then, let - let’s see the _masterpiece_ ”

Alice untangled herself from the chair gleefully and crawled onto the end of the bed. Flopping down next to Rick she offered him the book for his perusal. It was Rick, there was no denying that. She had captured his slim angular frame to an almost insulting degree of accuracy, although he wasn’t disappointed with the size of the bulge she’d given ‘pencil Rick’ under the sheet. Not due to vanity of course, but psychologically speaking, it demonstrated her satisfaction in the carnal department. Overall he only had one criticism...

“I haven’t got a head” He deadpanned. Everything was going swimmingly up until the neck area, then the whole thing just dissolved into squiggles and shapes and dots. It kinda looked like-

“It’s space,” Alice said plainly, as though that explained everything. 

Rick laid the book in his lap and circled his arm around her shoulders, laying them both back against the pillows. “I wouldn’t say I’m an expert in anatomy just yet, but I-I’m pretty sure I’ve still got a head.” He whispered conspiratorially into her hair. She smelt of honeysuckle, a hint of fresh sweat, and something uniquely her.

“Ha. Ha. Yes I know that smartass, it’s art, it doesn’t need to be anatomically correct. It’s an interpretation of reality, that how I see you.” She smiled up at him, but he looked mildly offended. 

“What? As an airhead?!” He scoffed. 

Alice pushed away from him and sat up, grabbing the book from his lap and studying it. “If that’s the way you want to interpret it, fine. A piece of art can mean something different to everyone that looks at it. This, for example, could mean that the artist sees the subject as a dreamer, constantly striving for more. More knowledge, more excitement, more adventure, more _meaning_ ,” She shot him a look. “It could represent the subject’s desire to explore unseen worlds or his lack of belief in a higher power, ‘above us only sky’. Or,” She chucked the book to the end of the bed and turned to Rick, “It could just mean the artist can’t draw faces. The point is you’ll never know. _That’s. The. Point._ ” She punctuated these words with friendly pokes in his side until Rick grabbed her hands and pulled her on top of him as she cackled in delight. 

“Well if the point of art is not knowing stuff about then I’m not sure I want to go any further down that road.” Alice looked as though she was about to launch into another tirade of pointless art dross, so he employed evasive tactics, pulling her head down and crushing his lips to hers. It wasn’t elegant but it served a purpose, and Rick even began to tentatively acknowledge the warm feeling spreading through his chest as Alice kissed him back with fervour, sliding her lips in time with his, nipping slightly, and flicking her tongue against the inside of his teeth. But all too soon it was over. 

Despite his attempts to keep ahold of her, she had wriggled from his grasp and bounded across the room like a greyhound out of the gate. 

“Oh no, I’m afraid you don’t get out of it that easily.” She said in a singsong voice. She bent down over her bag, fishing around for something, Rick merely laid back and enjoyed the view of his shirt sliding up her lower back. 

Turning, she launched something at him which he batted out of the air to avoid getting smacked in the face. “Start there. We’ll make an artist of you yet.” She smiled her big warm smile and Rick sighed once again. He was finding it increasingly difficult to say no to that smile, not that he’d tell her that, she’d end up reading too much into it as people have a tendency to do. He picked up the object which turned out to be a book, it’s bright cover emblazoned with the heading “A Guide To The Surrealist Movement”. 

Rick scoffed. “Screw that, I don’t need this!” Waving the book around dismissively but placing it on the bedside table all the same. Jumping out of bed himself, he crossed to the huge shelving unit that spanned almost an entire wall and started rooting around. Moments later he spun back, holding what appeared to be a homemade instant camera, just to catch the tail end of a blush adorning Alice’s cheeks. It was at that point he remembered about his complete lack of clothing and laughed.

“Hold it right there,” he said, raising the camera to his eye, “I want to capture this moment.”

“What moment?” Alice asked.

Rick peeked out from behind the camera. “You, thinking about my cock,” he said with a wink. He clicked the button and moments later the image of Alice’s wicked grin was sitting in his hands.

“There,” He said triumphantly, “Much quicker than drawing.”

Alice whacked him lightly on the arm as she passed on her way out the door. 

“Come on, time to get dressed.” She said, the finality of recognising a lost cause in her voice. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll be right behind you,” He called over his shoulder. His eyes fell back to the photo in his palm and he started to stroked his index finger down her face before he caught himself. His gir- No. Alice. Just Alice. Just... his Alice. Moving to the bedside, he stowed the picture just inside the book's dust cover, then followed her out the door.


	8. The Past Will Catch You Up As You Run Faster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick learns something new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you once again to everyone who's taking an interest in this fic, in all honesty, I didn't think anyone would read it!
> 
> I'd also just like to point out this fic was started pre-Season 3, and some of the decisions I made then might not tally with what's going on the in the show now, e.g Jerry, but it might influence it as we go along.
> 
> Chapter Title From [I Know by Placebo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGGWN2T-Nno)

Rick laid down his screwdriver and stretched his arms high above his head, prompting his spine and shoulders to give a series of loud, satisfying clicks. He had been in an unseasonably good mood for the past week and it was showing in his work. He’d already invented a new type of ammunition, built three different housework robots, serviced the ship, and had just turned the final screw in the surveillance bot he’d been meaning to make since the last time Jerry nearly skinned himself alive while snooping in his workshop. He hadn’t been this productive in months. 

He'd even found the time to check out the tip Sourisson had given him. The so-called NRIF – which he’d discovered stood for New Reform Intergalactic Federation – alleged to be the new formidable force of intergalactic bureaucracy, their jurisdiction being 'wherever citizens needed protection'. Rick had snorted his morning Irish coffee down his nose when he'd read that. He could see now why these assholes had slipped under his radar, they were just your run-of-the-mill, small planet, fascist splinter group. Or at least that's what he told himself, it certainly wasn't that he'd become distracted. Never the less he'd delved a little further; if they'd caught the attention of Sourisson, who could best be described as an interplanetary mafia boss, they were worth an extra five minutes of his time. But, other than a few small raids and a couple of unexplained disappearances, they had been mostly quiet. They weren’t at the top of his threat list just yet and he felt more than safe enough to engage in a bit of well-deserved frivolity. 

It was Saturday afternoon and he was in the mood for ice cream. He whistled to himself as he wiped his hands on a rag and went off in search of his grandkids, wondering to himself if it would appear too contrived if he invited Alice.

As Rick approached the door to the house, a squawking squabble could be heard emanating from the dining room. Rick sighed, trust this family to put the kibosh even the most robust of good moods. He stood in the doorway and surveyed the scene in front of him. Morty was laying on his back on the floor, one foot and an arm held aloft attempting to push Summer off himself. Summer meanwhile was in the process of trying to wrestle a pencil out of Morty's other hand and simultaneously avoid being kicked in the face. Beth sat at the table resolutely staring into the depths of her wine glass, ignoring the poor man's ‘WrestleMania’ happening on the floor next to her. 

“W-w-what the fuck are you doing?” Rick directed at the feral children.    
“Summer's being a bitch!” Morty shouted.  
“Shut up, you little turd! Give me the freaking crayon!” She yelled back  
“Hey, hey, both of you shut- shut up. None of what you're arguing about is important, ok? I-I-I'm not sure why that hasn't sunk into your skulls yet.” Rick said, coming over to tap Summer on the shoulder with his toe, knocking her off balance and onto the floor next to Morty.   
“We’re going for ice cream Morty, so stop being a little turd and get – get you ass off the fl _OOOUUR_ r - off the floor. Summer, you can come too if you stop being a bitch.”

A dual protest started to erupt from the floor, but Rick quickly silenced it with a flap of his hand.  
“I-I-I don't wanna hear it.” He said gruffly.  
“But Grandpa Rick, we can't come with you, we're _supposed_ to be doing a project together.” Summer said dramatically, “The whole stupid school is doing it. 'Draw the meaning of family life', whatever the hell that means. I think we should just tear the paper into little bits and hand that in.”  
“Wonderfully angst-fuelled Sum Sum, but as always misdirected. You're still wasting energy on the mediocrity factory you call school.” Rick sighed.  
“Well, either way, Mom won’t let us leave till it’s done.” Summer said bitterly and glaring up at her mother from where she sat on the floor, crossing her arms and huffing.  
“Yeah, Rick, a-art is the only subject I'm actually doing good- I'm not failing. I can't mess this up.” Morty looked up pleadingly at his Grandfather, whether asking him to leave him be or rescue him, Rick wasn't sure.

Rick groaned in frustration, “Morty, What– what have I just said? You're wasting your time, but more importantly, you're wasting _my_ time, so– so just– let's go.” He tried to beacon the pair out of the room but Summer stood firm on both of their behalves.   
“Mom said we had to stay, Grandpa.” She warned, knowing Rick wouldn't blatantly flout their Mother's word when she was sat in the room. He looked over to where Beth sat, softly muttering to herself about ‘poor parenting’ and pretending to read a novel. Rick decided to try a new tactic. Coming round the table he placed a hand on Beth’s shoulder. 

“Beth, Sweetie, you're a great Mother, and far be it from me to question your technique, but don’t you think you could give the kids a break, come get some ice cream with us, they can finish this later!” He implored in the best approximation of sincerity he could muster.   
Beth looked at him resolutely. “Well, that’s a nice idea Dad, but they really need to start turning in their homework, the school's been on my back ever since the almost divorce situation, I- I can’t have them failing, Dad. I’m- I’m putting my foot down this time.” She set her jaw making it clear she wouldn’t be budged. Sensing defeat Rick dropped the doting Father act as quickly as he's laid it on.

“Fine! Whatever.” He stormed out of the room like a petulant child, before returning moments later, shooting a portal into the dining room wall, and disappearing, the strains of Beth's panicked voice floated after him. “Dad? Dad?! Where are you going, Dad?”  
The Morty and Summer just stared, waiting for him to return again, and sure enough, a couple of minutes later a portal reappeared spitting out Rick, who was dragging a hopping Alice, still trying to put her boots on. 

“Jesus, Rick give me a second!” She yelled, before turning to see Morty, Summer, and their mother looking at her with bewildered expressions.   
“Oh, hi...” she said awkwardly.  
“Here!” Rick gestured to Alice, “She's an artist, she'll help you with your stupid project, just hurry up, I-I-I've got a Triple Chocolate Rum Sundae to eat.” And with that, he flopped down in the chair opposite Beth and glared at her for inconveniencing him.  
“O...K...?” Alice raised an eyebrow at Summer and Morty in questioning, and they proceeded to explain their project.

Rick had been full of good idea’s this week, but this had been his best yet. He’d thought of a hundred different ways to orchestrate an excuse to see Alice again, despite his reservations after their last meeting, but this had been handed to him on a plate. Perhaps it was these wild schemes which reminded him of their early days that had put him in such a good mood, or maybe it was just the idea of seeing her full stop. He wasn't going to ponder too long on the subject, all that mattered is the lingering of a warm feeling in his chest that had bloomed the moment her face had lit up at the sight of him standing in her room. 

It seemed like ever since she'd returned, Alice had been hovering at the fringes of his mind, weaving her way into most of his thoughts, and he was having an increasingly difficult time convincing himself that she wasn't a distraction. She was like a drug, and he was nothing if not an addict, he would enjoy the instant gratification now and worry about the regret later.

His attention returned to Alice who was mulling over what Morty and Summer had said, the creative cogs already turning.   
“Right, well, family life is going to mean something different to both of you isn't it really.” She pulled out another huge piece of card for the packet Summer had so graciously lent to the task. “So why don't you each take half of the page and just draw. Anything at all, it doesn't have to be literal, it's not a still life. It can be abstract or stylised. Just put your pen to the paper and draw whatever comes to you.”

They looked at her with doubt in their eyes. Alice sighed and sat down on the floor between them and plucked the pencil from Morty's hand and began to draw. They both looked over her shoulders in amazement as the nondescript dots and swirls began to resemble something recognisable. Summer started to tap Alice on the knee in excitement. 

“Ooo, ooo! I know what that is! It's the Helix Nebular! We pass it all the time when we go out with Grandpa Rick! Isn't that right,” She turned smugly to look at Rick who was reclining with his feet on the dining table. He dragged his eyes away from studying Alice to glanced at the drawing.  
“Hmm? Ye-yeh Su _UUUUUMM_ mmer, w-well done,” He said in a placating manner. Summer shot a look at Morty, but thankfully he decided to be mature enough to settle for an eye roll in return. 

Encouraged by Alice, the pair proceeded to fill the card with drawing and colour, depicting their family, but mostly their adventures. Alien species, man eating plants, star systems, and inventions. By the end, they were both laughing and sharing memories, like Morty having both of his hands bitten off by peckish space fish and having to grow them back before Mom saw, or when Summer accidental got high off a floral hat at an off-world bazaar and tried to eat the other customers. Alice listened intently to these little snippets of their lives, indulging them with bright smiles, and drawing small additional features based on their tales. 

Beth, who had gone slightly pale at a few of their stories, had left to settle in the lounge with her book and her wine box, satisfied they weren’t about to make a bid for freedom.

Rick was content to nurse his flask and block out their inane drivel, but occasionally, when no one was looking, he'd tune in for a story about himself, drinking in the sight of the three of them laughing together and trying his best not to join in. 

When the page was almost full, Alice turned to them.   
“Ok, this is all brilliant, but I think we need something in this space in the middle, an over arching theme that ties everything together.” The siblings glanced at each other then up at Alice, giving her a meaningful look. Alice nodded in understanding. Grabbing some pens, she set about filling the divide between the two sides. After a few minutes she sat back on her heels and capped the pen with a flourish and smiled. 

“An A+ if ever I saw one” 

Rick leapt up from his seat with a grunt. “Finally! Right, come on. Th-th-they better not have sold out of my flavour” he ushered the three of them out of the room.  
“Don't you want to look at our art, Grandpa Rick?” Summer asked  
“Summer, Sweetie, nothing would bring me more boredom,” Rick said in a saccharine voice, guiding her with a hand on her lower back into the garage.

Alice laughed. “Well I'll let you into a little secret, your Grandpa used to love art,” She said with a conspiratorial wink at Morty then smirking at Rick over her shoulder.   
“Love? No. _Tolerated_ , maybe.” He replied rolling his eyes.  
“W-well you – you’ve really got a talent for it Al- Ms Montgomery. Ha-have you always done art...stuff?” Morty asked.   
“Morty, Just call me Alice.” She snickered “And yes, for as long as I can remember,” She said wistfully, “I used to have tonnes of paintings and sketch books, I had these big ideas about selling them all one day.” She gave a slightly bitter laugh as they clambered into the ship. “God knows what's happened to them now.”  
“They're in a storage locker in Muskegon,” Rick said plainly, starting the engine.  
“What?” Alice said bewildered from the passenger seat.  
“Y-y-y-your parents were going to throw it out, I thought you'd want it, if – if ever you – you'd have wanted me to keep it.” Rick scratched the back of his neck feeling a little exposed all of a sudden.  
“Hey, Grandpa Rick, why don't we go look at some of Alice's stuff? It'd be fun!” Summer piped up from the back seat.  
“Oh I don't-” Alice began, but was quickly cut off by Rick  
“N-n-no, Summer! Look I-I-I've been waiting for you for about an hour now, ok? I-I-I – My patience is gone, so either shut up a-and think about the delicious ice cream we’re about to eat, or… well no, just shut up.” He snapped, pulling out of the driveway and up through the atmosphere.

 

.

\----------

.

 

The short journey to a dwarf planet just past Pluto passed in comfortable silence and Rick caught himself on more than one occasion marvelling at how the star reflected in Alice's eye. He gave himself a shake. When the fuck did he become such a sappy prick? This had to stop. He liked having her around, he always had, but because she was challenging and intelligent and hot, not because he wanted to write poetry about her eyeballs. When he finally allowed himself to glance at her again, once they had landed with a bump in the ice cream parlour parking lot, Alice was staring at him with a small knowing smile fluttering at the corner of her mouth as though she knew exactly what he'd been thinking. Bitch.

As they the four of them wandered across the potholed tarmac towards the garish pink and purple fronted shop Alice nudged into Rick's side.  
“Do you really have all my old stuff?” She asked, walking so close to him he could feel her body heat radiating off her.  
“Mm-hm” Rick affirmed gruffly, making a point to put some distance between their bodies. She was doing this on purpose, he knew it.   
“Will you take me?” She asked with a sweet smile.  
“Maybe, if you stop being such a fu _UUUUUUC_ cking tease.” He said, holding the door open for the group to file under his arm. 

Alice put on a look of mock affront, “As if I would!” She said, then turned to talk to Morty and Summer about flavours. Rick shook his head wryly, she would be the death of him. He made to follow them through the door but just before it shut behind him a voice carried over to him on the breeze.

“Found your little red head then.”

Rick stuck his head back out of the door, scanning the darkness of the lot. At first glance, it appeared to be empty, but just beyond the circle of light thrown out by the parlour, he saw a tall thin creature leaning against the wall. Rick wasn't intimidated by figures in the dark and approached without a thought.

“The fuck you say pal?” He called. As the neared the creature Rick saw he was humanoid in form but with leathery lizard like skin. He wore his customary tight, short smock that Rick always thought made him look like a reptilian prostitute.

“Rick Sanchez,” the man hissed “Long time no fuck.” He laughed as he blew dark blue smoke from his pipe into Rick's face.  
“In your dreams Salaman, as if I'd put my dick anywhere near you,” Rick said wafting the smoke away from his face with his hand.

“Mores the pity.” He grinned, revealing row upon row of needle-like teeth. Salaman Nash was a long-standing and deeply despised smuggling contact, willing to ship anything, anywhere, for the right price of course. Rick had used his services on a number of occasions but found his predatory sexual nature more than a little irritating. Not to mention the rumours that circulated around him. Suffice to say he wouldn't want Morty or Summer getting too familiar with him. 

“W-w-what did you say then? About my 'little red head'?” Rick pressed.  
“Nothing, Sugar, nothing, merely commenting that I'm glad she found you” Salaman studied Rick, as though gauging his reacting.   
“A-and how do you know she was looking for me, you little creep?”  
“Well I didn't, per say,” He reached out and toyed with the collar of Rick's lab coat, blowing another plume of blue smoke into the air. “But come on, green little thing like that begging for passage to Earth from Tortuga Delta, how could she not be one of your castaways.” Salaman's oily voice made Ricks skin crawl, but not as much as this new information about Alice.  
“You're lying. W-w-why the fuck would she be on Tortuga Delta?” Rick said through gritted teeth.

Salaman widened his eyes then shut them tight and smiled as though savouring the last bite of a perfect meal.   
“Oh! _Oh_ , this is _perfect_. I finally get to see Rick Sanchez on the back foot.” He looked at Rick smugly. “Where else do you think she'd go? All Earthlings lost in space end up on Tortuga Delta at some point. It's a human settlement after all, and even more of a cesspool than Earth. Any low life in the Vaxos System can find work there, even your naïve little friend.”   
The unrestrained glee in his voice had grown exponentially throughout his tale, just as Rick's simmering anger had steadily reached boiling point and was now on the brink of blowing like a geyser.  
“And boy oh boy was she desperate to get to Earth,” Salaman continued, “didn't mind paying me a pretty price for the privilege either!”

Rick lunged at the lizard man, one long fingered hand closing tightly around his windpipe and slamming his head back against the wall of the ice cream shop.   
“Now listen to me you prancing, amphibian fuck. Y-y-y-your going to tell me _everything_ you know about Alice,” He slid his plasma pistol under Salaman's chin, “or I'll melt your fucking head off.”

The cocky grin was gone. Sweat began to bead on his scaled forehead as he gasped for breath under Rick's vice like grip.   
“I.... I... Please, Please don't.... kill... me!” Salaman begged hoarsely.  
Rick's leaned in close and whispered in the lizard's ear. “Tell me.”  
“Ok... Ok...” Rick released his hand but kept the pistol mussel pressed firmly against Salaman's jugular.

After a fit of coughing, he began in a rushed voice.   
“All I know is she came to me looking to get to Earth, I asked why but she was very hush hush, told her the price and she spat in my face, stupid bitch,” Rick pushed the gun further into his neck making him squeak, “Sorry! I didn't see her again for months, then she came to me the night I docked in TD with an import, had the money so I said I'd take her, I asked no questions! And I swear I didn't touch her!” He finished panting hard.  
“What else” Rick growled.  
“Nothing! I swear! She was an easy fair, paid over the odds so I guessed she was green, but she was fierce as anything, nearly broke my fucking arm when I tried to up the price more, she could look after herself. But where she'd been before Tortuga Delta I don't know. I swear that's all I know.” 

Rick scrutinizer Salaman's black beady eyes, looking for the hint of a lie, but found only pissing fear. He lowered the gun and Salaman collapsed heaving onto the tarmac as Rick strolled away with his new information.  
“Fuck you, Sanchez” Salaman called weakly after him.  
“I-i-isn't there a street corner you should be standing on?” Rick quipped.  
“Maybe you should ask Little Red the same thing!” Salaman spat in return.

Rick didn't need to turn round to aim his shot. He made it to the door just before pieces of serpentine smuggler began to rain down onto the parking lot.

 

.

\----------

.

 

“Where've you been?” Alice asked cheerily as Rick sat down rigidly next to her at the small circular table in the back of the shop.  
“It's best not to ask,” Morty said with a shrug.  
“Well we ordered for you,” She said, a slightly concerned look on her face.

Rick said nothing, he was still digesting everything he'd heard from Salaman Nash and he was 8 parts proud to 2 parts deeply concerned. He wanted to ask how, why, what, and yet the last thing he wanted was to find out the answer. Rick was very familiar with Tortuga Delta, it was the place to go if you wanted sex, drink, drugs, or to be murdered, but most importantly it was one of the biggest smuggling ports in the universe. If it was black market, it had passed through TD at some point. Crime was the only option there and it was an easy place to earn a Schmeckle once you'd lost all your self-respect. Desperate people ended up on Tortuga Delta, and while he was thrilled she's survived, thrived even, he didn't like the thought of his Alice being desperate. 

A Triple Choc Rum Sundae interrupted his staring contest with the tablecloth, slid into his line of sight by slender little fingers. Rick followed them with his eyes as they retreated back to their owner but snatched them up in his own hand before they could get there, like a buzzard dive bombing a shrew in the grass. He looked up into Alice's smiling, gentle face and the decision was made for him: he wouldn't ask, not yet anyway. But all this just added to the feeling of being continuously out of the loop, which was a place Rick rarely found himself. He turned her hand over in his and felt her soft palm against his rough, calloused thumb before releasing her and picking up his spoon. It scared him, how much of a hold she had on him, and in the back of his mind he knew that smile would be his undoing. This innate power of hers made her dangerous, he was playing with fire, and he loved it.


	9. Like The Drunk You Convinced Was Sober, You Keep Me Falling Over. Think You’re Giving But You’re Taking My Life Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick and Alice take a trip down memory lane.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear to God I'll write the smut one day...
> 
> Chapter Title From [Missile by IAMX](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byNe7tn9fHg)

Rick studied the gentle expansion of Alice's chest, the sharp angles of her ribs straining against her shirt, as she inhaled from the joint held between pursed lips. The tip glowed orange in the dim light of Rick's bedroom, sticking straight up like a chimney as she lay on his floor. She removed it from her mouth and passed it without turning her head up to Rick, reclining on his bed, who took it then continued his scrutiny. She held the smoke a little while longer before exhaling a pearlescent cloud towards the ceiling.  
“It's good,” She said with a little cough.  
“There's some good shit off world, but th-th-there's a lot to be said for good old fashioned pot,” Rick replied taking a toke himself. 

Alice looked around the small, cluttered room. From her vantage point on the floor, she could see nearly everything. The sections of wall not lined with shelves was plastered in papers with twine linking various things together; the ceiling was slightly stained and bore the scars of a couple of violent explosions; and the floor, littered with more papers, boxes, and odd socks, was strewn with copious amount of liquor bottles.  
“This place is a shit tip,” She remarked, once again taking the proffered joint from Ricks outstretched fingers.  
“Says the woman who lives in a motel.”  
“Says the man who lives with his _daughter_. Don't start arguments you can't finish, Rick.” She handed the joint back with a sardonically raised eyebrow.  
“Hey!” He said, gesticulating with the roll up, “I'm a pensioner, I'm allowed to live with my daughter.”  
Alice cackled. “Technically maybe, but by any other measure there is no way you could be described as a pensioner.”  
“I'm flattered.” He dead panned, but reached down to card his fingers through her hair anyway.  
“Of course, it wouldn't be long before your mind starts to go...” Rick snatched his fingers back and glared at her half-jocular.  
“Come here” He beckoned, swinging his legs off the bed to sit up and patted the space next to him. 

Alice gave him a weary smile but leapt up spryly nevertheless and plonked down at his side. Rick put the joint between his thin lips, took the final drag then snuffed it out in the ashtray on his bedside. He turned to look Alice in the eye with a raised eyebrow of his own then down to her lips. He reached out and ran his fingers through the hair at the nape of her neck, pulling on it slightly as he felt a slight shiver run down her spine. He drew her head forward until their lips were almost touching and waited for hers to open, which they did with a shaky exhale. Rick pressed forward and, with the lightest of touches between them, blew the smoke he was holding in his lungs into her mouth, pulling back to catch the blush growing on her cheeks as she held it then exhaled. 

Rick laughed hoarsely, “That always used to shut you up.”  
He rose languidly from the bed, enjoying the subtle buzz Earth weed gave him, and wandered back to the pile of schematic drawings he'd been sorting before he'd decided to portal Alice in here. Filing was always more bearable with the right company and an eighth of marijuana. The distant strains of his family playing an unenthusiastic game of 'Yatzy' could be heard coming from the dining room making Rick roll his eyes. Attendance at these twice monthly games was compulsory for Summer and Morty, but Beth knew better than to insist on Rick's presence. Anyway, it gave him a chance to ask Alice about the information he'd received the previous evening. 

Rick had come to the conclusion that he wasn't going to tippy toe around the subject. If they were going to be friends, he needed to be able to trust her. As much as he trusted anyone that is. Plus he liked to solve puzzles, and she'd become twice as intriguing since her return from her trip around the cosmos.

“I heard a rumour about you” He began, not pausing in his paper shuffling.  
“Oh? All bad I hope” Rick could hear the smile in her spaced out voice.  
“I heard you were on Tortuga Delta”  
“Was I?” Alice seemed unconcerned with the accusation. Rick turned to look at her, leaning back against his dresser.  
“Apparently you travelled from there to Earth”  
“Oh, if you mean that crime-riddled hell hole then yes I was there, I didn't really have a choice” She flopped back on Rick's bed and stared up at a scorch mark on the ceiling.  
“H-h-how did you end up there?”  
“I don't remember”  
“Oh come on you-”  
“I honestly don't remember, Rick. I don't remember much at all from before a came to Earth, and the things I do remember I'd rather forget. Surely you can understand that?” She turned her head to give him a sharp meaningful look. 

Yes, he did know what that was like. He was almost ready to drop the subject, but there was one last thing playing on his mind; that parting jibe from Salaman Nash.  
“How did you get the money for the passage back to Earth?” Rick asked quietly.  
Alice sighed and turn back to the ceiling. “Look, Rick, sometimes we have to make a choice where all the options available to us are shitty, but we still have to choose.” She offered cryptically. Rick said nothing.

“Well, now _you're_ the one ruining the mood!” Alice's cheerful tone cut through the glum silence that had settled over the room. “IIIIII know! Why don't we take a trip to your storage locker! I wanna see my stuff.” She grinned cheekily.

Rick pulled a face and turned back around to his papers on the dresser top. All of a sudden he felt warmth at his back and a strong grip on the tops of his arms as Alice leant up to rest her chin on his shoulder.  
“Unless you fancy a game of 'Yatzy'?” She asked sweetly. 

Rick huffed out through his nose. This was not the plan. He'd found out exactly nothing new about Alice's whereabouts before she'd appeared to unceremoniously upend his life, and now he had to spend the rest of the evening looking at her art. A task he hadn't even enjoyed when she was painting it in front of him, nude. 

He shrugged her off his back and rooted around in his pockets for his car keys.  
“I-I-I-I want it noted how fucking pointless it is to keep meme _EEEEEENN_ ntos, and how much I resent you for forcing me to look at them.”

Alice shrugged on her way out of the bedroom door. “You're the one who saved them, not me.”  
Rick vehemently wished he hadn't.

 

.

\----------

.

 

It didn't take long to travel from Seattle to Muskegon in Rick's car, sailing just above the atmosphere. Alice kept up a steady stream of consciousness throughout the journey, whether to try and distract him from the obvious irritation he felt at being caught out as being a soft touch or to prevent him from asking further questions, Rick wasn't sure.

After no time at all the ship landed with a bump in a darkened storage lot, lined on both sides with low garages. Rick hopped out of the car and strode over to one on the left. He reached into one of the many pockets in his lab coat and pulled out a large bundle of keys, used one to open the padlock, and slid the door upward. Alice hung back just outside the yawning doorway as Rick ducked under and disappeared into the darkness for a moment before nasty white strobe lighting flickered into life. 

He dipped his head down and beckoned Alice in, she approached cautiously. Besides seeing Rick again, this would be the biggest piece of her life before abduction she'd come into contact with since returning, and Rick really hoped he wouldn't have to deal with an overtly emotional reaction. When you stepped under the low door and the first thing to hit you was the smell. Oil paint, canvas, and that musty odour of old books. It evoked such a strong olfactory memory in Rick, he didn't have to imagine how Alice must feel. It was the reason he never visited. Blood pounded in his ears as he watched her scan the room. He hadn't been lying, he really had saved it all. Stacked against every wall were row upon row of canvases, teetering towers of sketch books, art text books, boxes of half used supplies, and picture frames.

Alice slowly walked further into the small lock up, along the aisles that had been created by the piles of her history. Her fingers stroked gently through the dust that collected on the tops of boxes, forming tiny peaks and troughs on their cardboard surfaces. She said nothing. The pregnant silence and that overpowering smell in the damp, cool atmosphere were starting claw at Rick's lungs. He could feel his hairline growing damp as every breath he took dragged him further down into memories he'd tried so hard to forget. Images flashed before his minds eye like an old slide projector; paint splattered dust sheets, auburn hair splayed across his chest, quiet smiles, raucous laughter, sighing moans, silent tears, dancing, running, laughing, shouting, building things, showing off, bright blue blinding light, and screaming, screaming, screaming...

Rick dragged his hand through his sweaty hair and pulled it sharply. “M-m-maybe this wasn't such a good idea. W-w-w-what's the point of dwelling in the past, I mean you're back now! Who-who needs all this crap?” Tapped a box close to him with the toe of his shoe. 

He couldn't take it. This was far, far more than he ever bargained for. It was HIS fucking emotions getting the better of him and he hated it. The pleasant high from early all but gone and left behind a gnawing sense of panic. He felt trapped, he wanted to run. Memory after memory flooding his head. It was all far too serious now. All too real. He was in too deep, and before he'd even realised she'd moved Alice was standing in front of him, tears gliding slowly down her face, her eyes glassy and unfocused.

“Oh. Oh shit, I-I-I-I-I. Hey, it’s all- please don’t cry” he begged. That seemed to bring Alice back from wherever her reverie had taken her. She reached up and touched her face laughing weakly.  
“Huh, didn’t even know I was.” She said simply.

Part of him wanted to reach out and touch her, to comfort her, protect her from whatever horror lay before her. But there was another part that was crawling its way out of his chest, trying to get away, screaming for him to run, run, _run_. She was so close, he could feel her breath on his face. His mind went blank.

He wasn't surprised to feel her warm lips against his. He didn't bolt, he just enjoyed the familiar feeling, and when her lips started to move, Rick kissed her back. He took her angular face in his hands, tilting her head to gain more access to her soft mouth, warmth spreading through him as he felt her tongue flick against his lips. After just a few seconds Rick's brain caught up with his body, causing his eyes to fly open and him to stagger back, nearly tripping over the box he'd kicked moments earlier. 

Alice stood there, shocked. Shocked at her actions, maybe. Shocked at his reaction, probably. Her cheeks were flushed, her lips damp and red. She looked youthful and alive, kissing her felt wrong, it felt dangerous, it felt...

It was Rick who made the first move this time, reaching out and pulling her in by her waist, crushing his mouth to hers. Their kiss was feverish, all tongues and teeth and hands, and he felt a moan threatening to creep out of his throat. But all too soon the doubt crept in to burn away the fog of lust clouding his mind, and reluctantly he pulled his mouth away. 

He couldn't look at her, he kept his eyes closed, but pressed his forehead gently to hers and his arms wrapped tightly around her waist.  
“This isn't fair,” He whispered. “You can't do this to me.”  
He felt her arms drop from where they had been linked around the back of his neck.  
“Why?” She replied, her voice strained.

Reluctantly he opened his eyes. This wasn't fun anymore. The pedestal he's gently placed her on 40 years ago had begun to crumble. All at once he realised she wasn't some mystery that needed solving, some fiery relic from his lost youth, some indestructible plaything. She was just an unhappy, frightened woman, adrift in the world, and she'd chosen him as her anchor. And that could not happen.  
Rick untangled himself from her as though she was burning white hot. There was only one option left, his default reaction to anything beyond the far reaching realms of his comfort zone: Attack.

“Because how can this work?! I'm an old man and y-yy-y-you're a child!” Rick said in exasperation.  
“What the hell are you talking about? I- You're the one that always used to say 'age is just a social construct'!” Alice retorted imitating his bored, superior tone. She dragged a shaking hand through her hair.  
“Oh ok then! What do you think's gonna happen, hmm?” He narrowed his eyes at her. “That everything will go back to the way it was? That you can slot back into my life and not cause a massive fucking tidal wave that capsizes everything?”  
“Are you honestly telling me you haven't been happier since I came back?” Alice said with a challenge in her voice, finding her footing again.  
“Superficially maybe. But in reality, you've fucking ruined me! I've lost my edge, obvious things are passing me by, important things, and that's your fault!”  
Alice stared at him with incredulity. “Rick, for a man, who by his admission, has a pretty reprehensible moral compass, this is quite a violent reaction to an _age gap_.”

Rick took a deep steadying breath in an attempt to calm himself but all he found was that cloying smell.  
“It's not just that.” He began in an even tone. “I'm trying to be the bigger person here, for once in my life I'm actually trying to _save_ someone from my _'destructive behaviour'_.” He sneered complete with air quotes.

Alice gave a derisive laugh. “Oh right, well my mistake Rick! Were you also trying to protect me when you were seductively blowing smoke in my mouth earlier? Or when you were grinding your cock against my leg in that fucking bar? You can't honestly be so clueless as to how that would make me feel. Isn't it obvious I still feel the same way about yo-”  
“Don't” Rick cut across her.  
“What, Rick?” She approached him aggressively. “Don't what? Tell you I still love you? Well, there I fucking said it. I still love you, fucking deal with it.”

The night was spiralling way out of Rick's control, but the thuggish, stubborn part of his brain was not in the mood for damage limitation.  
“Then you're far more mentally challenged than I first thought. I neither want nor require your _love_ ” He spat. “Love is just a more palatable word for _need_ , and I refuse to be needed by you, or by anyone else.”  
“Well tough shit, Sweetheart, it's a little late for that. You have a whole family of people who love you, even though there isn't a cell in your body that deserves it.” Alice poked him hard in the chest, venom leaking for every pore. “And they can't help themselves! You gather people up in your orbit then spit them out, whether through boredom or self-inflicted disaster, and they're left picking up the pieces of their world after you've smashed through it. You have people who are willing to take the risk that you'll ruin their lives just to have the chance to stand in your shadow, and yet you refuse to acknowledge their significance in return!”

Alice was breathing hard when she finished and Rick could smell the taste of her mouth, sweet, minty, with a hint of smoke. It made his heart constrict.  
“Well maybe that's true, but I didn't ask for it, so why should I reward their deifying tenancies.”

Alice shook her head. “Because in real life there's give and take, and if all you do is take you're going to turn round one day and realise there's no one left to give.”  
“Oh save me your fucking armchair philosophy. Let's not forgot that it was _you_ who drew _me_ in. You weaselled your way into my life and you made me break my only fucking rule. Don't Trust Anyone! Then I spent the rest of my life fucking miserable, because of _you_. You don't know _anything_ about real life. What you think just because you were abducted by fucking aliens you have a higher knowledge about the value of life? _Fuck_. _You_.”

The words had left his mouth before he could even process them, and try as she might to hide it, Rick could see the hurt etched all over Alice's face. They stared at each other in silence as regret began to tunnel its way through Rick's brain.

“Just take me home,” Alice said quietly, not a trace of emotion left in her voice.

And so he did. 

 

.

\----------

.

 

“Fuck!” Rick huffed as his toe caught on the last step at the top of the stairs causing him to crash into the carpet. He was beyond drunk. He crawled awkwardly along the landing, using a freshly opened bottle of gin like an ice pick to pull himself along, pausing every now and then to take a healthy swig. He didn't know the time but guessed it was around 4 am as everyone was sleeping soundly despite the cacophony he'd created throughout the house in the 40 minutes it'd taken him to get from the garage to just outside Morty's bedroom door. Maybe they'd just gotten used to it over the years. 

He reached up for the handle, leaning heavily on it and swinging into the room like a cat who'd learnt to open doors. He staggered to his feet. He was going to tell Morty, tell him straight, tell him exactly how he felt, and Morty wouldn't care because why the fuck would he? Morty was a piece of shit and Rick meant nothing to him, just like Morty meant jack shit to him. Yeah. He'd tell it like it is. 

He tried to stagger his way over to the bed but one of his legs felt heavier than the other so the going was difficult. He looked back, squinting through the darkness with bleary eyes to see Morty's school bag strap wrapped around his foot. Eager little beaver must have set it by the door ready for a brand new week at school. Chump. With much difficulty, Rick disengaged himself from the bag and set it back by the door, but something caught his eye before he could continue on his quest to wake the boy up. A large rolled up piece of paper sticking out from under the front flap. He bent down and snatched it up, slapping a hand to the door frame as the world lurched violently forwards with him. Little shit was stealing his schematics! When he unrolled it though, he found it difficult to make sense of. He plucked the gin out of his pocket to make sure he wasn't accidentally drinking brake fluid again. 

Then it dawned on him. It was that shitty collage they'd been working on with... _her_. He looked at it again. He hadn't seen it after they'd finished, but maybe he should have looked. Maybe he wouldn't have done all the things he'd done this weekend if he had. There in the middle of all the ups and downs of his family's life was the symbol which his grandkids and Alice had silently agreed was the centre their universe. A simple, line drawing of him. 

Bile rose quickly in his throat and attempted to spray all over the paper but just about managed to control it enough to dribble down onto his sweater. The picture glided down to the floor as he fumbled through his pockets. No. No more of this. This ends now.

 

.

\----------

.

 

Morty stirred from his dream, awakened him a green flash behind his eyelids he could have sworn was real. He sat up and rubbed his face.

“Rick?” He called out into the darkened room, but he wasn't there. 

He rose the next morning and headed down to breakfast ready to question Rick about the puddle of vomit on his carpet, but he wasn't there either.


	10. I Was Thinking That You'd Called Somebody Closer To You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summer's on a mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Title From [This Is The Last Time by The National](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-VVp-tKqFNY)

A month and a half had passed with no sign, no word, not even a whisper. Summer rinsed her toothbrush under the tap and stared at herself glumly in the mirror. This was the only time she allowed herself to wallow in the huge, gaping chasm that Rick had left behind. She couldn't do it around her family, her Mother and Morty didn't need any more sadness to add to their ever growing pile, and she couldn't do it at school, who gets that worked up about their psycho Grandpa disappearing, lame! But in this time, just before she wandered off to bed and settled down for a fitful sleep, she let the emotion show just a little. 

The first week hadn't been that concerning, Rick often disappeared for a while and then return as though nothing had happened. By the middle of the third week though, they began to realise maybe this wasn't normal. Beth had been beside herself up until recently, but in the last few days had taken on a sense of quiet grief, having resigned herself to the fact Rick wasn't coming back.  
Morty had been like a set of traffic lights, flashing from anger to acceptance to faux relief at his new Rickless life. But late at night Summer sometimes heard him crying softly through her wall.

She dried her toothbrush on her towel and dropped it into the holder on the counter, her tired eyes drifting from the study of her own face to a blob of Rick's stubbly shaving cream that had melted and dried on the edge of the sink, left there like a weird shrine. Summer rubbed it off with the edge of her towel, it would probably stay there forever if she didn't. 

Back in her room, she attempted to shrug off her therapeutic moment of sadness and drag herself back to normal life with mundane tasks; plugging in her phone, setting out tomorrows clothes, brushing her hair out of the pony tail shape it got stuck in when she tied it up wet. Slipping under the pink covers she lay back and started up at the swirling, nonsensical patterns of poorly applied paint on her ceiling until the phone under her pillow buzzed.

_Alice M  
-Anything?_

Summer quickly tapped out a reply

_Summer  
-Nothing :-/_

This was a ritual they went through every night since she had gone to visit Alice on the Thursday of the third week, hoping that she might have some answers. She had arrived just as Alice was leaving her motel room, bags packed and in hand, and hope had swelled in Summer's chest. But she hadn't caught Rick and Alice eloping together.

“I got a job!” Alice had shouted cheerfully as Summer crossed the parking lot towards her. “And it comes with an apartment!” But her broad smile died on her face as soon as Summer asked if she'd seen Rick. That was when Summer learnt of their argument, in the sticky motel reception, while a zit covered motel employee leered at them from behind the protection glass. 

Summer didn't blame Alice, she was angry at Rick more than anything, but Alice had sobbed her apologies over and over while they held each other on the lumpy couch. 

“I didn't mean for any of this to happen,” she said as she composed herself. Summer had the feeling she didn't cry all that often, she had looked mildly horrified at the water she found on her face, and a weird, needy part of Summer felt privileged to have seen something she doubted Rick ever had.

Alice had begrudgingly agreed not to blame herself and Summer had decided not to tell anyone else about their altercation in the storage locker. What good would it do anyway?

Back in her bed Summer fired off a few messaged to various friends in an attempt to distract herself from the misery that threatened to overtake her, and before long she was drifting off to sleep with her phone plastered to her left cheek. 

She was just on the cusp of a dream when her cheekbone began to vibrate and the screen blinded her as her eyes flew open. 

“Toby!” she gasped trying to assessing her surroundings. She opened the message and squinted at it. 

_Grandpa Rick  
-Third cupboard from the right, behind the bovine slug pellets, bring the box and the orange first aid kit to Splint Splash Pool, tell no one, signed - a friend. EEEEEUUUURRRP Vocal-Type off No don't write fucking piece of shit delete no oh just send fuck you SEND SEN._

Summer's heart pounded in her throat, heat rose on her face as adrenalin coursed through her system. In seconds she had flown out of bed and was dressing in tomorrows clothes at the speed of light. Throwing on a black hoodie she checked the time on her phone then stuffed it into the front pocket, 1:37 AM, better not risk the stairs, her mother would most likely still be dozing on the sofa. 

Crossing to the window she heaved it open and relished the cold blast of air on her skin. Climbing up onto the window sill she stepped down backwards onto the trellis her and Rick had reinforced purely for the purpose of her sneaking out; to encourage independence he'd said. She jumped down the last couple of feet and landed with a dull thud on the lawn. The TV shone out through the patio doors but as she crept closer, flush against the wall to peek around the door frame, she could see her Mother snoring soundly, sprawled on the couch. Nevertheless, she dashed across just in case, stopping just under the small garage back window. It only took a few seconds to jimmy it open with a discarded screwdriver, then she was climbing up and through as quietly as possible, stepping down from the top of the washing machine and doing a triumphant little dance. Just call her mother fucking Jane Bond!

Crouching down at the third cupboard from the right under Rick's work bench, Summer dug through the contents of it using her phone as a touch light. Just behind a tall glass beaker filled with a tar like substance stood a large tub of purple pellets with a picture of a slimy looking cow on the front. She pushed everything gently to the side, careful not to knock anything over and wake up her Mother. The last thing she needed was her flying in here thinking Rick had returned. Summer pulled out a small black case with a thumbprint scanner where the clasp would normally be and squeezed it into the front pouch of her hoodie. 

Next, she scanned the room for the first aid kit. It only dawned on her then that the request could mean Rick was injured and a mild panic began to set in. Spying a small orange bag on a high shelf above the bench she reached up and pulled it down by the strap, unfortunately knocking off a pot of screws in the process. She started to cringe the before they even hit the bench, cascading down in a metallic waterfall of 'Let's Wake Up Mom!'.

She heard the distant smash of a wine glass as Beth presumably lurched awake at the noise, no doubt she'd be in here in less than a minute. Summer slung the strap of the bag over her chest and leapt up onto the washer and was out of the window before the last of the screws hit the floor, and closed it behind her moments before the internal garage door opened. She leant against the wall of the house breathing hard, her hands shaking with adrenaline, her face red and sweaty. She hadn't felt this alive since her last adventure with Rick. Sneaking around the side of the garage Summer spotted Morty's bike propped up against the wall, weeds growing through the wheel spokes due to lack of use. Pulling it free she hopped on and set out towards town and the peculiar meeting place. 

Summer barely saw another soul on the 20 minute ride and she felt confident she'd got away undetected. She pulled off the main road when she reached the other side of town and cycled a few more minutes down a side street before pulling into the parking lot of the pool. It was the first week of December so 'Splint Splash Open-Air Pool' had already been drained for the winter and abandoned till next spring. Summer dropped the bike near the fence and started the climb, the bitter wind biting at her hands and face. Dropping down onto the other side she looked around the dark poolside.

For the first time since she received the text, she stopped to think about what she was doing, this could be a trap and she'd walked right into it. The changing room doors creaked ominously in the wind and a shiver that had nothing to do with the cold ran down Summer's spine. Just as she was contemplating calling the whole thing off, she heard a loud echo-y belch coming from the bottom of the drained pool. She sighed in relief, she'd recognise that gassy bastard anywhere. 

She approached the pool, peaking over the edge and saw Rick slumped in the corner at the other side of the shallow end.  
“Su-Sum-Suu _UUUUUMMMEE_ r f-for the... erm, for the win.” He called giving her a weak wave.  
“Grandpa Rick! What the fuck are you doing there?!” She whisper-yelled across to him.  
“Did-did-did you get the stuff?” He ignored her question.  
“Yes, I did.” Summer replied shortly, stomping her way down the ladder into the pool and making her way across the slippery surface. 

“Gimm-g-gimme the box,” Rick reached out with grabby fingers towards her like a child while she stood over him, lips pursed and hands on hips. Up close he looked like total shit. His half lidded eyes looked painfully bloodshot and his skin was a sickening shade of yellow. This was the most inebriated Summer had ever seen him and her searing anger was laced with worry.

She reached into her front pocket and pulled out the box. “Where have you been, Grandpa? We've all been worried sick!” She crouched down in front of him and handed over the box. All she received in reply was a slobbery “Pfffft” and a dismissive flap of his hand.

She watched him place his thumb over the scanner on the front, and after some difficulty lining it up, the box sprang open and revealed what looked like a huge biopsy needle attached to a gun. Rick took it out and started to fumble with his lab coat, trying to get it out from under him, then pulling his sweater and vest up on his right side, displaying more yellowed skin and dangerously prominent ribs. He continued to struggle as Summer watched, letting out a frustrated noise when, every time he went to ready the gun, his top fell back down. He looked at Summer and gestured.  
“C-c-could you just?”  
Summer took pity and sat down beside him, gently lifting up the offending garments which were giving off a rather powerful odour. Rick positioned the needle between two of his lower ribs, inhaled deeply, then stabbed it into himself, pulling the trigger once it was all the way home. He yanked it how and hissed in pain, dropping his head back against the slimy tiles of the pool's wall. 

“What the hell was that?” Summer asked letting his sweater fall back into place.  
“Liver rejuvenation serum. Gr-grows back a healthy liver in 20 minutes, b-b-b-but it hurts like all hell.” He winced a little as he shifted to look at Summer with unfocused eyes.  
“Y-y-y-y, Summer you're a fucking idiot. Come-coming here alone”  
“What? You told me to come alone!” Summer heard her yell of indignation echo around the pool.  
“Y-Y-You had no idea that was me.”  
“Grandpa Rick, your name comes up on my phone when you text me.” She explained as though he was as dense as her Father.  
“M-might not have been me th-tho _OOOOUUUUG_ gh.” He burped into her face.  
Summer huffed, she wasn't going to tell him she'd only thought about that _after_ she'd arrived at the pool.  
“Fine, whatever.” She heaved herself up off the floor and started to walk away. 

“No no no! Summer, wait!” Rick grasped the hem of her retreating leggings and pulled her back. He looked so forlorn sat there in a crumpled pile on the floor. She rolled her eyes and sat back down.  
“I-I just need the orange bag first,” He said sounding a little less catatonic now.  
“Ahhh! Fuck you, Rick!” Summer made to scrabble up again but was stopped by an arm across her chest and Rick's hoarse laughter.  
“I'm kidding, I'm kidding! Stay, please.” He gave her a weak smile which threatened to dissolve her glare.  
He bumped her gently with his shoulder in a playful manner. “H-have you got it though?” He asked cautiously. 

Summer unhooked it from across her shoulders and handed it to him. She watched as Rick shrugged out of his lab coat, roll up his left sleeve, then unzipped the bag, pull out an alcohol wipe and wash the crook of his arm. He dove into the bag and brought out a syringe and a small, sealed injection vial filled with a clear liquid. With some difficulty, he dragged his belt through the loops in his trousers then secured it around the top of his arm. 

“What's that?” Summer asked as he unwrapped the syringe and plunged it through the foil lid of the vial. “Something to regrow another organ?” Rick ignored the sarcastic hint in her voice.  
“This, Sum Sum, is purified liquid cocaine.” He said as he flicked the bubbles to the top of the syringe and squeezed them out.  
“Rick! What the hell?” Summer was sick of yo-yo-ing between feeling sorry for him and being angry at his self-destruction. 

“What?” He asked injecting the prominent vein and then groaning in an overtly sexual manner, making Summer blush. “When you regrow a liver you can have some too.” He threw the things back into the bag and pushed it away from him across the pool floor, then settled back, resting his head on Summer's shoulder. 

They sat in silence for a good half hour, listening to the wind whistling over the top of them, before Summer spoke up.  
“Why did you ask me to come?” She asked quietly, not wanting to disturb the comfortable atmosphere too much.  
“Because I-I-I needed this stuff and didn't wanna to come home. Not yet anyway.” She could feel his jaw bone moving against her shoulder.  
“No why did you ask _me_ , why not Morty?” She could sense Rick was rolling his eyes at that, but she deserved a little validation after everything she'd done.  
“Because Morty wouldn't understand.”  
“I don't understand either though.”  
Rick shrugged. “You understand enough not to completely fly off the handle, and can infer I'm not in the mood for histrionics.” 

“I spoke to Alice” Summer said cautiously.  
“Eugh, good for you, wh-wh-what do you want a lollipop?” Rick said sitting up away for Summer.  
“Why don't you just come home, Grandpa Rick? We're worried about you.”  
“That.” Rick gestured out in front of him to nothing in particular. “That's why. I don't need that.”  
“What people who care about you? I don't think it's a case of needing it or not, it's not a choice, it's just something that happens.” Summer said.  
Rick sighed and bumped his head against the tiles a few times. “I know,” He said quietly. “I-I-I-I not good with... with-”  
“Emotions? Relationships? Connecting with other human beings?” Summer offered.  
“Ouch. But yes, all of those things.” Summer had never heard him speak so candidly, or sound so miserable.  
“Well you've got to be bad at something, you're good at everything else” Summer said with a smile. 

“Kiss ass” Rick chuckled slightly then went quiet again. After a while, he said, “I had to get out.”  
“Somehow I doubt a month and a half of binge drinking is going to help you figure things out, Grandpa.”  
Rick just scoffed, as though it was a ludicrous idea to think drugs and alcohol wouldn't solve all your problems.  
“Come back a-a-and tell me that when you've lived the life I have.” 

Summer steeled herself to ask her next question, but she was convinced that maybe if Rick just talked about it...  
“What actually happened that night?” Summer felt Rick's body stiffen slightly.  
“Wh-wh-what night?”  
“You know the night Alice was abducted, I dunno maybe if you talked about it you'd feel better?”  
“Talking about feelings has never gotten anyone anywhere Summer, stop putting your faith in self-appointed Tumblr psychologists.” He attempted to stagger to his feet but fell back hard onto the tiles again. Summer stood and offered him a hand.  
“Well _not_ talking about them has gotten you here! Regrowing a liver in an off-season leisure resort!”  
Rick grasped her hand and together they managed to haul him to his feet. “Don't try and sound intelligent about things you have literally no concept of.” He snatched his hand out of her grasp.  
“You asked for my help!”  
“A decision I am _seriously_ regretting.”  
They glared at each other in a stalemate. Summer caved first.  
“Just come home, Grandpa Rick. Mom and Morty are miserable.” She crossed her arms firmly across her chest as though that was the final word on the matter. Rick turned his back on her and shot a portal into the floor, flooding the pool with acid green light which bounced off its walls. He turned back to her with a defiant glint in his eye. 

“Yeah, yeah, get off my back _Mom_. I-I-I-I'll be back soon. Gotta break in this new liver first!” He patted his side. “Oh and don't tell anyone I was here.” Summer opened her mouth to speak but Rick cut her off. “It'll make you Grandpa's favourite!” He gave her a wink, spread his arms wide, and fell backwards into the portal.  
“Catch ya later, Summinator!” 

And with that he disappeared, swallowed up by the portal, leaving Summer standing alone in the dark empty pool, feeling like she'd been taken for a fool. 


	11. I Want You More Than I Need You, I Need You So Bad, Are You Coming Back? I'm Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So I feel like the last chapter could have been a little boring in terms of its lack of Rick/Alice, but it was one of the very first ideas I came up with, and I loved it, so I couldn't not write it! Anyway, if you were bored, hopefully this will make up for it :)
> 
> Chapter Title From [Waiting by Alice Boman](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_KQdMgLW-K0)

Rick was three cans of beer into a new day when he found himself sitting in the plush, corporate chic reception of a large glass building. He'd heard about the service they provided a few years ago, but until now could never fathom why anyone would want to use it. He leant back in one of the surprisingly uncomfortable armchairs which littered the area in front of the reception desk and slammed his feet noisily onto the frosted glass coffee table. The blue skinned woman behind the desk turned her two heads towards him and narrowed her six eyes, Rick winked one of his in return. Had it of been any other day he would have probably tried to get her number, see what else she had two sets of, but alas, even to him it seemed a little insensitive. Besides he was hardly in the mood. 

His eyes drifted up to the huge picture floating behind the blue woman's head of a group of serene looking people of various different species, and under them, the company tag line: Synco-Reve – Your Memories Are Our Privilege. Rick scoffed; their privilege indeed. He was brought back for his musings by the appearance of another creature in the lobby.

“Mr Sanchez?” He said in a deep voice.

Rick gave a small wave and heaved himself up as the creature crossed the plush carpet towards him.

“A pleasure to meet you, my name is Dr Crange Flannery, would you like to follow me?”

Dr Flannery was a tall man, with lumpy, furry skin in a pleasing shade of duck eye blue. Below the hem of his lab coat scuttled a number of similarly coloured legs, and if Morty had been there he would have said he looked like a crab crossed with an over stuffed teddy bear. 

“Here at Synco-Reve, your comfort and care are of the up most importance. We combine quality customer service with cutting edge technology to ensure you have the best possible 'Rewind Experience'. For the past 74 Shlimbracks,” He briefly consulted the file in his fuzzy hands, “My apologies. For the past 9 Earth Years, we have been at the forefront of the memory retrieval industry, making it possible for anyone to access memories-”

“And get them addicted to reliving their former glories, while you lot harvest their residual brain transference energy to power your heavily industrialised planet.” Rick cut across him. Dr Flannery suddenly looked nervous. “No need to worry Doc I-I-I don't give a shit what sha _AAAAAAA_ dy business you've got going on here. I-I just wanna to get this-this thing over with.”

Dr Crange gave a small sigh of relief then, sensing Rick had no interest in the rest of his spiel, nodded and quicken his walk down the corridor. 

“Very good, Sir, right this way.”

He lead Rick to a nondescript panel in the wall and placed his paw like hand over it. A glowing blue outline flared up, then the panel side back and revealed a stark white room. The doctor guided Rick inside and motioned for him to sit on a bed like contraption that wouldn't have looked out of place in a tanning parlour. 

“Seeing as this is your first time with us Mr Sanchez, might I suggest a fairly recent memory? The process can be quite draining on those who are inexperienced, then in a few week-”

“Y-y-y-you don't have to worry about me, Doc, just crank it up to 11 and leave me in peace. I'm going _deep_ ,” Rick said dismissively as he started to attach electrodes to his own head. “Y-you're gonna be able to power a whole country with this one.”

The doctor looked nervous again but quietly left the room when Rick laid back on the bed and pulled the large, curved glass hood over himself.

When he heard the door slide closed, Rick squeezed his eyes tight shut, breathing rapidly through his nose. It was so quiet in the pod he could hear his heart beating and his eyes moving under his eye lids. If he was going to make this work he had to face this fear, relive this particular memory, go through some self-induced exposure therapy. It probably wouldn't work, he'd probably walk out of here more miserable than when he arrived, but it was worth a shot, SHE was worth the risk. 

He wiped a hand over his mouth, re opening his eyes, and was met with a screen projected onto the roof of the pod a couple of feet from his face. 

'Please key in approximate date for Memory Retrieval'

Rick keyed in the exact date, it had been engraved on the inside of his skull for decades. The screen changed.

'Thank you. Please lie back, relax, and enjoy your Rewind.'

For a few seconds nothing happened, Rick thought maybe it wasn't working when all of a sudden his body was filled with a searing electrical shock staring in his head and ending in his toes, then everything went black.

.

\----------

.

 

_10th December 1975_

Rick's chest heaved as he struggled to draw breath in his prone position on his sofa, Alice writhing under him as their tongues battled for dominance. What had started out as a 'hello how was college?' kiss was quickly turning into a 'how fast can you get your clothes off' kiss. Rick adjusted himself slightly towards the back of the sofa so he was no longer trapping his erection, which was already struggling against his drainpipe jeans. Alice moaned deeply into his mouth as the hand that had been exploring under her top slowly trailed down her waist, over the ticklish bit on her hip, and down the outside of her leg. She knew what was coming, this was Rick's move to ramp up the tension and she began to pant slightly in anticipation. Rick loved doing this to her, the slightest touch got her so hot and bothered, it was adorable. He laughed slightly into their kiss. 

“What?” She said breathlessly.  
“Nothing” He smiled. “Just shut up and _feel_.”

And with that he moved his hand to the inside of her thigh, fingertips tracing small circles against her goose-flesh skin, getting higher and higher until his hand was disappearing under her mini skirt. She whined needily at him as he got closer. 

“I know, Baby, I know” He cooed. During sex was the only time when she was in the least bit submissive and he took full advantage of having the upper hand for once. 

As his hand crept closer to her panties he could feel the warmth radiating off her, and he knew when he touched the fabric would be wet. He loved having that effect, getting her all hot and bothered... Wait why did he keep thinking that? Hot and bothered, hot and bothered. His hand stilled.

“Fuckin' of course!” He yelled leaping off the sofa and sending Alice flying into the floor.  
“What the ever living fuck, Rick?!” Alice squawked in alarm, face down on the carpet.  
“I-i-it's so fucking simple! I increased the motor capacity but didn't vector in additional cooling requirements! Poor little thing's over heating!” He was practically manic with excitement, bouncing on his toes and staring off into the distance, already miles away from what was about to occur on the sofa.  
Alice flipped herself over and glared at him from the floor, auburn hair stuck to her slightly sweaty face.  
“I swear to god, Rick, if you do that one more time I'll suffocate you in your sleep, I'm getting bruises, Rick!”  
Rick looked down as though he'd only just remembered Alice was in the room. He bent down to pluck her up off the floor and plonked her down on the sofa.  
“I know, last time I swear. W-we'll finish this, just... entertain yourself for a bit, I just need to...” He began backing away out of the room gesturing behind him. “I'll just be a couple of minutes.” And he rushed from the room, dodging the cushion Alice threw at his head.  
“You said that last time you bastard!”

A couple of minutes turned into a couple of hours, as it always did when Rick was struck by inspiration. It wasn't that he didn't care, but his work was paramount, and he was blessed to live with someone who understood that enough to give him a few hours of solitude without real complaint. 

Roughly 10 minutes before the 3 hour mark, it became clear that Alice was bored, and the strains of the record player began to waft through to his workshop at the side of the house. But it didn't matter, he was finished. With the expansion of the highly sophisticated liquid cooling system, his Trans-Dimensional Gateway Key was complete. Now all that was left to do was test it. 

He opened the rickety wooden door of the shed and hopped up the back door steps and into the kitchen. Alice, the goddess that she was had put a stew on to simmer for them, no doubt one of the care packages her mother brought round when her father was at work. Nice lady, despite her conservative views. She believed love conquered all, a little 'Mills & Boon' for Rick's tastes but it was a damn sight better than the reception they'd received from her father. Watching his little girl go to _art_ college _and_ move in with an older guy who dropped out of school to invent stuff in his shed was a little too much for the old fart to stomach.

Rick followed the music to the dining room turned art studio and found Alice stood there, paintbrush in hand, swinging her hips to [T-Rex's 'Bang The Gong'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=arqmwd8jgow) in nothing but a paint splattered shirt and stockinged feet. He came up behind her and grasped her hip bones pulling her back so her backside rubbed against his crotch as they swayed together. Alice lifted her arms above her head to lace her fingers around the back of his neck, clearly enjoying the sensation. 

“At least you're not playing Christmas songs anymore,” Rick murmured into the skin of her neck between light kisses. 

“Hmmm, don't worry I'll put Bing Crosby on in a minute, _just_ for you.” She giggled when Rick made a noise of disgust in the back of his throat. 

Suddenly she spun around in his arms and started to walk him backwards to the threadbare, paint smeared armchair that sat in the room, pushing him hard in the chest when his calves hit the base. Rick was about to protest this cruel treatment until he saw her close her eyes and let the rhythm of the music overtake her. With her arms above her head, she gyrated her hips causing the shirt to ride up and reveal bright pink knickers underneath, the damp patch from their earlier fondlings still clearly visible. Rick's drainpipes started to feel very tight again. Thankfully Alice chose that exact moment to straddle him in the chair, continuing her lap dance where he was able to reach her. His hands slid up the backs of her thighs to the swell of her ass, fingers slipping just under the hem of her underwear to squeezed gently, causing her to hum in approval. 

Rick reached up to mouth at her neck again, nibbling his way up to whisper lyrics into her ear.

_“You're dirty sweet and you're my girl.”_

Alice made a weird noise, somewhere between a moan and a laugh whilst grabbing his stubbly jaw and pulling it round to kiss him, tongue slipping into his mouth, making him squeeze her behind tighter. 

She pulled back slightly and whispered against his lips, “I love you.”  
Rick studied her face, “I know,” He said.

The song came to an end moments later leaving only the static noise at the end of a record filling the room.  
“As much as I'd love to sit here all night, I really need your help with something.” He said rather sheepishly.  
Alice sighed dramatically, “Fine!” she exclaimed, but it was said with a kindness only she could muster. 

.

\----------

.

Half an hour later Rick and Alice could be found on the small back lawn, the porch light illuminating their frosted breath fogging around them like wispy summer clouds. Rick stood near the house under the light typing away furiously on the screen of his Trans-Dimensional Gateway Key, while Alice stood draped in a shawl shivering in the middle of the lawn, holding what looked like a satellite dish on a stick.

“Rick, it's fucking freezing, can I at least go and get dressed?”  
“What? N-n-no, this'll only take a second, just hold still.”  
“You said that 10 minutes ago!”

The machine started to whirr and buzz and spit out reams of paper which Rick snatched up and scanned quickly and a broad smile spreading across his face.  
“Oh, _yes_. Right, I've got it!” He rushed over to where Alice was stood, steadily turning paler in the December chill as the minutes passed. 

“Look!” He thrust the readout under her nose.  
“Rick, this is all Greek to me, what the hell is this thing?”  
Rick sighed, his patience wearing a little thin.  
“I-I-I've told you before. It's a Trans-Dimensional Gateway Key, although I need to come up with a better name for it than that. This, THIS, is the key to accessing different dimensions, alternate realities! I know they exist I just have to get there and prove it! Th-th-this could change everything we know about the universe. Get rid o-of the silly notion that we're at the heart of it, that we're important. The universe-”  
“Doesn't give a shit, yeah I know” Alice laughed. “So what am I doing with this?”  
Rick wafted the paper in his hand in her face.  
“I believe I've locked onto another dimension, and this,” He pointed to the dish in her hands, “Is the key. I'll send the beam and you just direct it at the sky. I mean if it's a success I can work on making it small and stuff, but this is the first step!”  
He grabbed Alice's shoulders and shook her a little.  
“Aren't you excited?” He said somewhat maniacally.  
“Yeah! Just... A little worry, it won't like back fire onto me or anything, I don't want to end up with two heads or something.” She laughed nervously.  
“It's perfectly safe,” Rick said, and as if to sweeten the deal he kissed her soundly on the lips. “Don't worry, I'll be right behind you.” He smiled and dashed back to the machine. 

After a little more typing he looked over to Alice.  
“Ready?”  
“Ready!”

He pressed the enter key and all at once the lights of the house dimmed and flickered, as though the machine was drawing all the energy from it, and a thick purple beam shot from the middle of the dish. It pooled in the sky hovering about 20 feet above the ground and Rick felt a rush of excitement. It was actually fucking working! But his joy faltered slightly when from inside the pool they'd created, a piercing blue light, blinding in its intensity, shot down the beam and into the dish. The lights of the house suddenly glowed bright, brighter than they were ever meant to be, and the machine started to smoke. The size of the beam grew steadily until it was larger than the dish and the light spilled over onto Alice's hand, forcing from her a blood-curdling scream as though she'd just been burnt with acid. 

“Alice!” Rick shouted, dashing out across the lawn, but by the time he got there she had already been consumed by the beam. He launched at her but found the burning blue light impenetrable. It was at this point that panic turned to pure, unadulterated fear, and he could see in her eyes she felt the same. She dropped the dish and as she began to pound on the shaft of light as though it were solid glass, Rick could see the scorch mark on her hand. He turned back to the machine to see if he could shut it off but found it was already in flames and vibrating violently. He had lost control. 

He turned back to Alice, her muffled screams echoing strangely as they both fought against the growing sense of futility, hammering incessantly on the light prison. As much as he didn't want to leave her, Rick knew he needed to find something to break through the light, if that was even possible. He ran to the shed and returned moments later was a laser gun and his plasma cutter. 

When he saw Alice up close again his lungs constricted painfully. Her normally perfect eyeliner was smeared halfway down her cheeks with tears, her hands blackened from fruitlessly attacking the walls of her cage. Rick fired the laser gun multiple times over her head, but all he succeeded in doing was burning patches of grass when the beams bounced off the light.

Then something caught Rick's eye, long, black, smoke-like tendrils were floating down through the swirling blue and purple pool. All too soon they were licking around Alice's body like flames, investigating her tear streaked face. Then they began to wrap around her, and lift.

The moment she felt the weight go from her feet Alice's eyes widened frantically, and Rick could hear the horrified echoey call of his name, her face contorted with fear. 

“Alice! Alice! Look at me, it'll be ok! I'll get you I promise, I...” He reached up frantically, his palms burning against the blue shaft of light, but her feet were already above his head, he couldn't reach her. 

“I'll find you, I promise, I'll come and get you!” he screamed.  
And she screamed back. Screamed and screamed and screamed, and Rick could do nothing. The light got brighter and brighter until it was searing is retinas, but still, he kept on watching as she was taken further and further away from him, until she was nearly gone. 

Rick grabbed the plasma cutter and started to slash at the light in desperation. Yes! It worked! As though by magic the light began to fizzle and smoulder away, and he was able to move into the centre of the tube of blue to hear a noise like wind in a vacuum which chilled him to the bone. He looked up and saw the soles of Alice's shoes struggling against the blue-black tendrils. But as the tube receded further upwards, the tendrils one by one started to let go, until Alice was left dangling briefly from just one, before falling to the ground with a sickening thud.

As quickly as it arrived the blue shaft closed and the light was gone like the switching off a tube television, the pin prick which remaining slowly fading away. Rick dragged Alice to her feet examining her all over for signs of damage, then as they gripped each other's hands tightly their frantic panting turned into breathless laughter. Relief flooded through them both.

But it was short lived. The lights of the house began to surge again and with a crack like thunder, the dark sky above them ruptured. From the blue seam it created, the black tendrils dived down and engulfed Alice, wrenching her backwards towards the sky like a ragdoll, as though she had a fishing line in the small of her back. Rick felt her fingers slip through his, the blue seam closed, and she was gone. 

The lights of the house reached their peak and exploded, and he was left in the darkness, on his knees in the middle of the lawn with the machine fire flickering behind him.

He had no idea how long he sat there, seconds, minutes, hours, years? He didn't even realise where that awful, dreadful noise was coming from until Mrs Langley from next door brought his face to her large bosom and begged him to stop crying. She sat beside him and stroked his tufty hair 'til the air was filled with the lights and sirens of morons who could never to help him, then squeezed his hand tight and promised him it would be ok. 

But he knew. He knew that it wouldn't. 

.

\----------

.

Rick lurched upwards and smashed his head into the domed roof of the pod. He pushed it open with weak, trembling hands and vomited violently on the smooth, white tiled floor below. If there was ever a good time to drown in vodka, this was the moment. Thank fuck for Summer and her dial a liver service. He needed a drink, now.

As Rick was stumbling out of Synco-Reve's main doors drenched, not for the first time that week, in his own vomit; somewhere many lightyears away, on a tiny planet called Earth, Alice sat and stared up at the stars from her new apartment window, wondering, and waiting.


	12. I'm Right In Front Of You, With Every Colour Of Love In Your Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rick returns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jesus Christ, this chapter was a nightmare. It took soooooo much longer than expected, so I'm sorry about that. It's also very long, like over 6500 words. I did think about splitting it up but I feel like I've owed you guys this chapter for a while... Guess what, I actually wrote some smut! I found it very difficult so I'm really sorry if it's a bit of a disappointment. Feedback would be hugely appreciated on this chapter, I'm very nervous about it. Thank you again for reading, love you guys. It's 3am I'm very tired.
> 
> Chapter Title From [Every Colour Of Love by Arthur Sharpe](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7hPuvzatO8)

“Alice, Dear, why don't you take your break now the morning rush is over, hmm?”

Alice dusted her hands on her red work vest and smiled gratefully at the little plump lady. “Thanks, Mrs Hoffman”

Although it could hardly have been called a 'morning rush', a steady stream of customers had been filtering through the doors of 'Hoffman's Home Improvement Supplies'. Mostly builders and other tradesmen picking up parts for their morning jobs, and a couple of stay at home Mom's wandering around the craft section looking for Christmas decoration materials. Alice headed off towards the stock room, weaving her way around the aisles of the small shop.

Jill and Dennis Hoffman were in their mid-70s, both of them short and rotund, mild mannered and carefree. But most importantly they asked very few questions. Alice hadn't been holding out much hope when she'd wandered through the door with a doctored CV and fabricated papers. Yes, she was the committing identity theft of a dead person, but technically that dead person was herself so, no harm no foul, right? As it turned out the Hoffman's were surprisingly accepting of shady characters, which was probably due in part to the fact their son was serving time for supplying narcotics to half of Washington State. 'Everyone deserves a second chance', that was their motto, and luckily for Alice, they more than lived by it. A full-time job and a little apartment above the shop, it was almost too good to be true. 

Alice grabbed her coat from the peg by the back door and stepped out into the side alley, her cheeks flushing in the frigid December air. Christmas was fast approaching, as was the 2 month mark of Rick's disappearance. Alice had been through a whole kaleidoscope of emotions in that time. At first, she'd just assumed Rick was done with her, and while that was a little upsetting, she thought it to be perfectly than understandable. She'd demanded too much, too soon, perhaps even too much full stop. Therefore it had been a bit of a shock when she had learnt from Summer that he had washed his hands of his whole family too. So for the past few weeks, she'd been flip-flopping between worry and anger, with a dose of self-flagellation thrown in for good measure. Right now she was back to worrying.

Alice dug around in her pocket and pulled out her cigarettes and lighter, her frozen fingers fumbling with the spark wheel for an eternity before she was able to take that first calming drag. Leaning back against the rough bricks of the building, the fingers of her left hand fiddled with the crumbling mortar as she watched the comings and goings on the high street beyond the entrance of the alley, vaguely hoping to see the wiry silhouette of a particular scientist.

Closing her eyes Alice enjoyed the sensation of cold, mid-morning air mingling with hot smoke in her lungs until a sound like a bomb going off jolted her into a coughing fit. She spun towards the source of the noise at the other end of the alley and saw that the two big industrial bins were shaking violently, one of them spewing paper and styrofoam as though something had fallen into it from a great height. Alice approached nervously, it was unlikely to have been a bomb, but maybe? 

A weak groan and a belch stopped her in her tracks. She watched as dishevel blue hair and long sallow fingers crept out from the depths of the trash. Alice's breathing quickened as another cascade of emotions rocked through her. Relief, joy, excitement, and most notably anger. Oh yes, apparently she was firmly back in the anger camp. Why was she angry? She should just be happy he's not dead. Well, she was... But she was also angry at him for making her think he might be, angry at him for making his family worry, angry at him for making her blame herself, angry at him for just being _him_.

Rick managed to swing a leg over the top of the dumpster, then teeter precariously on the edge before flopping down onto the dirty ground with a wince. Alice waited, standing a few feet away, maybe if he said the right thing she wouldn't be so angry, although she wasn't entirely sure what the 'right thing' actually was. 

Rick coughed, still slighting winded from what seemed to have been a rather lofty entrance. He slipped a hand into the pocket of his extensively soiled lab coat, pulled out a bent cigarette and popped it delicately into his mouth. Finally, he turned to look Alice in the eyes, his face the picture of calm.   
“G-got a light?” he asked raising an eyebrow. 

Alice closed her eyes and scoffed loudly, then turned and headed back towards the shop. She took the last few drags of what was supposed to have been a relaxing smoke, before pausing to aggressively crush it under foot.

“Waitwaitwaitwait!” Rick yelled, scrambling to his feet with some difficulty and rushing over, jumping in front of Alice just before she got her hand on the door. 

“I-I-I'm- I didn't mean that, i-it was meant to be funny! I was just doing a-a bit!” He implored, swaying slightly where he stood. 

He looked, frankly, awful. His big, blue, bloodshot eyes looked sunken into his skull, underlined with large black bags threatening to swallow them whole. His skin had the yellowish tinge of a few too many weeks of heavy drinking, and for the first time since Alice had returned, she thought he looked genuinely old. Old, and tired, and very, very drunk.

Alice huffed sharply through her nose, “Go home, Rick, your family is worried.” She said through gritted teeth. She reached for the door again but Rick darted his hand out and leant against it, his wrist wobbling, causing him the list this way and that.

“W-w-wait, just, I need to, j-j-just hang on, hol-hold your erm, hold your horses there, You.” He looked down his long nose blearily at her, pointing a wavering finger at her. 

Alice followed her arms and said nothing, in the back of her mind she knew this anger was probably a bit of an overreaction. Or was it? She had no idea anymore. 

“I-I-I-I know things- you-I- _we_ said some-some stuff that, you regret, _we_ regret, probably. I mean, you were kind of a bitch, but-”

Alice growled in frustration, “Rick! I don't have time for this! I need to get back to work, and you need to _Go_. _Home_. ”

An odd look came over Rick's face, as though he'd suddenly been taken by surprise from behind. 

“You- _pffffght_ ” He placed the ends of his fingers over his mouth to try and hold in any more involuntary noises, “Pardon me.” He cleared his throat. “You have a... a job?” 

Rick tried in vain to rein in the smile that was attempting to take over his face, but it was a losing battle. Laughter explored forth, spraying Alice with alcohol flavoured spittle. 

That stung. All she was trying to do was get a little slice of normality back in her life. Against her better judgement, she went on the offensive. “Jesus Christ, Rick, we can't all spend our lives high stepping it around the galaxy. All you had to do was come back and say sorry, but no, you can't even bring yourself to do that much.” But Rick was too busy heaving with laughter to listen. Alice had had enough.   
“Fuck this,” she muttered. She grabbed the handle and wrenched open the door sending the already off balanced Rick sprawling onto the floor. A pang of regret melted away some of her anger.

“Shit, are you ok?” She asked peeking around the door. 

He staggered to his feet again, “Yeah, yeah, I'm-” and vomited furiously all over the alley then passed out into the sizeable pool. 

“Oh for fucks...” Alice sighed sliding her phone out of her back pocket and punching in Morty's number. Just when she thought she couldn't be more thankful to have understanding employers.

 

.

 

\----------

 

.

 

“Thank you for coming so quickly, Morty” Alice said rubbing her upper arm awkwardly. 

She'd managed to clear away most of the onlookers before a 14-year-old boy landed a spaceship in the alleyway behind a home improvement store, but she still couldn't help feel a bit responsible for the whole situation. Morty, however, seemed to be taking it in his stride. 

“Th-that's ok, Ms M-Mon-Alice.” He smiled as he hauled a lightly snoring Rick onto his shoulder with worrying ease, paying no mind to the vomit Rick was liberally basted in. Perhaps that's why he often wore yellow...

Alice helped by rushing forward to open the ship's door, allowing Morty to plonk Rick into the passenger seat. He sighed and grabbed a rag from the glove compartment and started to wipe off the worst from himself and his Grandfather. Alice hovered behind, concerned, but still irritated at Rick's behaviour, although she was trying to hide her annoyance from his Grandson. 

Morty paused in his ministrations to glance over his shoulder. 

“You're angry.” He said plainly.   
“Erm...” Alice shifted from foot to foot.  
Morty turned back to his task. “I-i-it's ok to be angry. Rick makes me angry all the time, I'm angry right now, he's an asshole. But once you accept that, you realise it's ok to be pissed for a while, then it's easier let it go. Rick never feels guilty, why should we?”

Alice quirked an eyebrow at the surprisingly insightful teenager, he clearly had a lot more practice at coping with Rick than she did, poor kid. 

Morty finished his attempted clean up operation and launched the rag into the dumpster Rick had arrived in, then shut the door and leaned against it. He looked as though he was steeling himself to say something, opening and closing his mouth like a fish. He studied Alice keenly, and she was suddenly struck by the family resemblance, that familiar scrutinising look, she almost blushed. 

“Look...” Morty began hesitantly, “I-I-I don't know much about love, but as much as he denies it, I know Rick.” He scratched the back of his neck and sighed again, Alice thought he seemed a lot older than 14.   
“I-I-I s-spend a lot of time with him, and it seems to me that you've become this-this fetishised version of the perfect woman in his head. He's always chasing these impossible versions of perfection...” He paused. “But when he realised that even you would end up getting hurt by him he freaked out. H-he might be the most intelligent being for light years around but he has the emotional maturity of a teenager. Trust me it takes one to know one!” He laughed nervously.

“And sure, that's owed in part to his massive intelligence, he's over rationalised emotions into mere synaptic impulses and chemical reactions which he thinks he can rise above. But, I think it probably also has a-a-a lot to do with the fact the love of his life was taken away from him without warning or reason. He didn't choose to leave or-or make you do it for him, he wasn't in control. From what I've heard you were the first person he truly cared about that wasn't himself. You made him feel less lonely in a world where he would always feel alone. He got a taste of what normality might feel like, and he didn't completely hate it. It's pretty hard to fill a void like that when it's been growing for 40 years.”

Alice just stared in wide-eyed amazement, mouth catching flies, as 'Morty The Rick Oracle' continued his reading.  
“I-I-I-I'm not saying it's easy, but you wouldn't blame a dog for biting you if it was terrified. Well, normal human interaction for Rick is like a trip to the vets.” Morty shrugged, “Ha, but jeez, I dunno, may-maybe I'm reading into it too much!” 

He gave Alice a winning smile before sliding over the hood and climbing into the driver's seat. Within seconds they were hovering above the shop, then they were gone, over the rooftops leaving Alice stuck dumb in the vomit washed alley. 

 

.

 

\----------

 

.

 

Alice had finished the working day with the distinct smell of stomach acid in her nose and a growing feeling of guilt in the pit of her stomach. After closing up the shop and hosing down the alley she returned to her flat to spend a considerable amount of time in the bath. But no amount of ylang ylang and juniper was going to wash away the regret gnawing at her insides. Her anger at Rick had subsided after the words of Morty's revelation had begun to sink in. Yes, Rick was a jerk, but she had probably been too harsh. She had no idea what his life had been like in the time she'd been gone, she'd barely even asked, and the embarrassing level of self-entitlement she'd felt had probably ruined everything. Perhaps she had been justified in some of her indignation, but so had Rick. Today she'd been given the chance to start afresh, and she'd blown that too. 

She wandered around the small flat like a zombie in lilac fleece pyjamas, half-heartedly making a cheese sandwich and flopping down in her armchair to zone out in front of the TV. By the time midnight rolled around she was semi-watching a late night horror flick, failing to keep Rick out of her mind. She wished she'd been nicer to him in the alley, taken him home and offered him support. He'd run away for a reason, it wasn't out of spite, it was out of fear. She groaned and flopped her head over the arm of the chair. If only she could get another shot at today. She'd just caught herself fantasising about being the woman on screen who was being bludgeoned to death when the doorbell rang. 

Panic laced with a hint of excitement rushed through her. Her front door was at the top of a rickety metal staircase that ran up the back of the shop, tucked away behind an out building, no one would know it was there unless they were looking for it. She stood slowly and edged her way out of the living room into the hall. It was probably just Mr Hoffman delivering a new rota, or maybe one of the Smiths? Or maybe... She listened at the door for any telltale axe murderer noises then cracked it open and was greeted with a slender, lab coat clad back. The blood pounded in her ears, if only it had been an overly polite home invader. 

Alice swung the door wider and Rick turned to face her, eyes fixed on the ground. He looked infinitely better than he had done hours previously. The acrid smell of sick was gone, as well as all visible traces from his clothing. His grey-blue hair was slicked back slightly from a fairly recent shower, although unruly tufts had already started to spring back up. He still looked dog tired, but it was clear he achingly sober. The last vestiges of cocksure bravado were gone, he looked open and defenceless, and it was a little scary.

“Rick?” Alice said, uncharacteristically timid.   
It looked as though the mere sound of her voice was painful to him. His mouth downturned into a grim line and his eyebrows pulled up over the bridge of his nose. 

“I...” He sighed, “I'm... I just wanted to say... I'm sorry.” He finally met her gaze.   
Her breath caught in her throat at the sheer honesty in his voice, the sincerity in his eyes. This was more than she could ever have hoped for, more than she probably deserved.  
“I'm sorry too” She whispered in return.

They said nothing for a while, they just stared. Alice was afraid that if she moved Rick might flee, she had no reference point for this. Cocky Rick she could handle, drunk Rick she'd seen, but this? This was unexplored territory. All worry ceased however when Rick took the plunge. 

It started first as a twitch of his fingers, then slowly but surely he raised both arms in an obvious invitation for a hug. Alice began to smile slightly causing Rick to roll his eyes and look away in embarrassment, but he still kept his arms raised, fighting valiantly with the urge to snatch them back. Alice moved forward slowly, as though she was approaching a wild animal, until she was close enough to be enveloped by his arms. On hand slid up to cradle the back of her head while the other wrapped tightly around her shoulders, with her own arms slinking around his slim waist. His head dropped into the crook of her neck and stayed there as he spoke in a voice barely above a whisper. 

“I-I-I can't lose you again, I just can't.” And just when Alice through the moment could get no stranger, she felt a wetness at the neck of her pyjama top. She tried to pull back to look at him but he held her fast, pulling her impossibly closer as they stood, freezing on her doorstep.  
“You won't, I promise.” She said, furiously blinking away her own tears. She did nothing but cry these days it was very annoying.

Her breath was warm and damp against his shoulder, keeping her nose from going numb, but her fingers had started to hurt from the cold and she tried to bury them in the folds of Rick's coat. Rick seemed not to mind, keeping his face hidden against her shoulder. Gradually, however, he began to move, adjusting just slightly so that his lips brushed against the soft skin above her collar. They opened a fraction and dragged just barely on her flesh giving the suggestion of a kiss. Alice stilled, holding her breath to see if it was just a mistake. But no, there it was again, the merest hint of movement. Her eye's widened as she tried to breathe normally. Rick became more deliberate in his actions, adding more pressure and definition to the kisses, his chapped lips making the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. 

He began to move higher up her neck, mouthing gently as he went until he reached that sensitive part just under her ear, at which point his tongue darted out to taste her just washed skin. The weird dreamlike spell was suddenly broken as Alice's fingers bunched in his lab coat and her breath quickened. Finally, Rick pulled back to look at her. His pupils were blown wide, all trace of tears gone. He raised an eyebrow in questioning, a gentle smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.  
“Too easy” He whispered then captured her lips in a hard searing kiss. 

His hands moved to her shoulders, pushing her back over the threshold as his lips moved against hers. Alice could barely breathe let alone think, her attention solely focused on the sensation. She was brought briefly back to her senses when her body was slammed into the hallway wall, Rick breaking the kiss to kick the door shut behind him before he was upon her once more, this time prying open her lips with a probing tongue. Alice moaned as the taste of toothpaste and fresh liquor flooded her mouth, this kiss was much nicer than the last one they'd shared. 

Rick's hands seemed to be in 12 places at once, flitting across her body as though trying to relearn all its contours. Alice was left playing catch up, sliding her hands up to his shoulder blades to feel them moving under his skin as hands threaded into her hair and he relocated his mouth to the edge of her jaw.  
“I need you” he muttered between kisses, “I need you, Alice, please.” He was almost begging.

Alice couldn't concentrate enough to respond verbally, she felt completely overwhelmed by the smell and taste and feel of Rick. All she could do was cup his face in her hands and bring his mouth back to hers, claiming it in a plea of her own. Finally, he broke away from their kiss, but not before softly nipping at her lip with his teeth. 

“Do you really want this?” He breathed, voice gravely with the effort of keeping it steady.  
Alice nodded furiously, taking the opportunity to heave air into her lungs.  
“Tell me” He whispered into her ear tugging her earlobe with his teeth.   
“Yes, yes I do... Do you?” She sounded pathetic even to her own ears, all needy and wanton like a sex starved teenager.   
Rick laughed throatily, using his height advantage to back her further into the wall. He stroked up her arm and captured her hand in his, removing it from around his neck and cupping it against his crotch.  
“Hmm, w-what do you think?” He grinned salaciously, cocking his head to the side in mock questioning.

Alice let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding as her hand came into contact with the beginnings of Rick's erection through his trousers. In an effort to regain a little control she moved her hand further down and gave his balls a firm squeeze. The stifled, high pitched moan Rick gave told her she wasn't the only one feeling a little overwhelmed.  
“Huh, I dunno, Rick. Could just be all talk and no trousers?” Alice smiled back with a head tilt of her own.   
“Oooohoho, right we're playing that game are we?” 

Before Alice could respond Rick had hooked both hands under the backs of her thighs and slung her legs around his waist, pressing her into the wall again so he could slide his hands up to the swell of her behind. Alice's surprised squeal forced another gruff chuckle from him as he ducked his head and began a second assault on her sensitive neck, licking and sucking, no doubt leaving faint bruises on her pale skin, turning her into the wriggling, moaning mess. 

Rick stroked his freshly shaved cheek against Alice's like a cat, bringing his mouth level with her ear.   
“Fuck, I've missed hearing you moan” He voice sounded strained.   
Alice ran her fingers into his messy tufts of hair and moved his head round to look into his eyes. They said nothing for a moment, just stared at each other, breathing heavily. Rick touched his forehead to hers like he had in the storage locker so many weeks ago, but this time his words were very different.   
“I need you. Now.”  
Then without warning, Rick hauled her off the wall, supporting her weight with ease and headed down the hall.

“Where are we going?” She asked breathlessly.  
“Bedroom, unless you want me to fuck you up against the wall.” Rick shrugged suggesting the location meant very little to him. “Wh-where is it?”   
Alice gestured behind her to the door at the end of the corridor, and Rick wasted no time, kicking it open and throwing her down onto the double bed. Alice stretched out on the sheets and admired him from below. He was looking at her with such reverence it made her stomach flip and her heart stutter. How did he still have such an effect on her? Did she have that effect on him? Part of her doubted she did.

“You're so beautiful.” He said simply with a small shake of his head.   
“I just have one question.” He stripped off his lab coat. “Wh-wh-what the fuck are you _wearing_?” 

The room was dark, illuminated only by the street light outside pouring in through the large window, but Alice could see that wicked grin taking over his face and it made heat to pool between her legs.   
She cackled “They're warm!” Crossing her arms over her chest in indignation.   
Rick bent over and uncrossed them, linking their fingers together as he pushed them over her head so he could lean down on them, hovering inches from her face.   
“They're ridiculous.” He stated, brushing his nose alongside hers then kissing her briefly.  
“I thought I was supposed to the be pensioner.”  
He pushed himself back up again and stood over her.  
“Take them off.” He demanded.   
Alice was no pushover, not by a long shot, but Rick being domineering in the bedroom made her panties wet, and he knew it. 

However, Alice paused and bit her lip, not in an effort to be coy, but in genuine worry. She didn't... look quite the same as she had before. Her body served as a reminder of the torment she had suffered.   
“Come on, quit stalling, I-I want to see you,” Rick said, she could hear the joyful anticipation in his voice. Well, it was dark she thought to herself, maybe it would be fine.

She took the hem of her top in slightly shaking hands and peeled it up slowly over her head, and discarded it on the floor. Once it was off her head she lay there, half naked hoping he wouldn't notice, and fought the urge to cover herself. Rick took it upon himself to remove her pants, pulling them slowly down her legs and Alice high-fived her past self in her head for taking the time to shave her legs in the bath. 

Rick stood there for a moment, squinting through the darkness, before moving towards the bedside lamp.   
“Hang on,” he said, fumbling for the switch.  
“Wait, Rick, no!” Alice dived across the bed after him but it was too late. A warm orange glow flooded the room, leaving Alice wide eyed and exposed. She snatched her legs up the hug her knees, hiding her body from prying eyes. 

Rick's eyebrows furrowed, and his eyes narrowed.   
“W-wh-what's wrong? What are you hiding? Don't tell me you of all people have _'body issues'_ now.”  
Alice clenched her jaw and looked down at the quilt.   
“People change, Rick,” she said hoarsely.   
“Oh come on! You look exactly the same! I'm the one who's all old and wrinkled, but you know what I do I fucking own it, Baby!”   
“It's not that,” Alice said. Jesus why was she fucking this up? Rick wouldn't care, would he? No. But... Maybe it'd remind him too much of the abduction, maybe he'd leave again. She'd never show them to anyone, not willingly anyway.   
Rick grasped her chin and turn her head to look at him. “Then what is it?” He said softly.

Unable to move her head Alice looked away with her eyes, steeling herself for the inevitable. He'd probably get a fucking flash back from this and freak out again. She released her knees and slowly lowered her legs until she was sitting upright on the edge of the bed, her chest exposed.   
“What? W-what am I meant to be looking at- Oh...” Great, that's it. He'd seen them, now he was going to leave and-

Rick slowly knelt down in front of her so their faces were level, parting her knees so he could get closer. The long, white, Y shaped autopsy scars glinted strangely in the soft light and Rick placed his hand over them, palm flat between her breasts, looking her straight in the eye.   
“Never hide yourself from me. Never.”  
He pushed against her chest gently so she was laying back on the bed again. He followed her, crawling over her, then, starting at her right shoulder, he began to kiss his way along the raised marks, travelling down her breastbone while Alice watched in amazement. This was more intimate than anything they had done the first time around. Back in the 70s, it had been mostly mindless fucking, as kids tended to do, confusing lust with love. But this was tender and sweet, and altogether a bit weird, and Alice couldn't help but blush. 

Normal order was restored however when Rick launched a sneak attack on her left nipple, causing her to arch her back and groan loudly as he toyed with it, making it harden under his tongue and teeth.  
“Still so sensitive” He muttered, almost to himself as though he was taking notes during an experiment.  
Finally, the leaned back on his heels, his legs astride her hips, and pulled his own top over his head revealing a myriad of scars and badly healed wounds littering his lean chest. Without thinking, Alice reached up to run her hand over a few of them. He was even wirier out of his clothes, although that had always been the case. His body was lithe, but not as toned as he used to be, which was understandable given his age.   
“Like what you see, Sweetheart?” he gave her a wink, making her giggle again. He brought the hand exploring his chest to his face and kissed the middle of her palm. 

“We all have scars, you dumbass. I've had 60 odd years of having the shit kicked out of me by enemies and friends alike. Look,” He motioned to just under his sternum to where a pale pink starburst marked his skin. “That was _Morty_. He shot me in the fucking pancreas. The _pancreas_ , who does that?!” Alice's gravelly laugh escaped her chest. 

“So come, enough fucking around, let's get this motherfucking show on the road!” Then he was back to licking and sucking down stomach, until he was able to snag the edge of her panties in his teeth. He looked up at her and waggled his eyebrows suggestively and Alice swatted him over the head.   
“Dirty old man” She laughed.  
He crawled back up her body to lay against her side. “I-is that so? Well, we'll just see about that.”   
He slid his hand over her mound and down between her legs and found what Alice imagined was an impressively large wet patch.   
Rick gave a faux gasp, “I might have known!”   
He began to rub her gently through her panties, and Alice bit her lip trying to keep her noises in. She was doing pretty well too, until he found her clit.   
“Oooh, fuck, Rick!” She gripped the tops of his arms tightly. 

Obviously bored with the barrier between them, he grabbed the hem of her panties and push them down her thighs. Then he was back, fingers moving through her closely trimmed hair and down between her lower lips.   
Rick moaned in the back of his throat. “F-fuck, you're so wet.”   
Alice tried to respond but all that came out was guttural noises, as Rick slowly began to push a finger inside her while sinking his teeth into her shoulder.

It normally took more than a single digit to get her going, but there was something about Rick that drove her wild. Maybe it was because he reminded her of being a teenager, or maybe his just happened to tick all of her kinky boxes. Either way, with only the gentle movement of his long finger inside her she was flushed and panting like a mad thing.

Alice's eye flickered open to see him staring at her in wonderment, studying her closely as he added another finger and started to stroke over her clit with his thumb. Her feet scrabbled for purchase on the quilt as her back arched, as though she was torn between trying to get away from him and wanting to push against his hand.  
“Ri-hi-ick” She gasped as the first fringes of an orgasm began to appear.   
Rick went back to sucking on her neck, he obviously hadn't forgotten any of her erogenous zones.  
“You like that, Sweetheart?” Ask murmured into her skin.

Not to be out done Alice blindly fumbled for his belt and fly, then reached into his boxers find his cock, fully hard now and leaking precum onto her hand. It gave her as much satisfaction to draw a shaking moan from Rick's lips as his fingers currently going to town on her did. Spreading the wetness with her thumb she stroked him tight and firm in the confined space of his trousers, enjoying the sensation of Rick's hot, panting breath on her neck. 

But if this was a competition, Rick was winning. He fingered her deep and hard, crooking his fingers masterfully to hit her G spot just right, all the while circling her swollen clit with a pad of his thumb.   
“Yeee-ees” She moaned, all cognitive integrity had abandoned her at this point.  
The heat began to build in the pit of her stomach and every laboured breath became a sob of pleasure.   
“I'm- Rick- I'm- I'm gonna...”  
Rick placed his lips against her ear “That's it, come for me, Baby”  
His words were her undoing. Her orgasm crashed through her like a wave onto a rock. The fingers of her free hand pulled at the sheets while her legs locked and her toes curled, almost to the point of causing cramp.

She zoned out for a few seconds, enjoying the rush of endorphins and the weak floppy feeling of post orgasmic limbs. She finally came back down to Earth to witness Rick's shit-eating grin as he licked her wetness from his fingers.   
“Yep, still got it,” he said with a wink before leaning down and probing her mouth with his tongue, allowing Alice to taste a hint of herself. She began to move her momentarily stilled hand again, smiling as Rick groaned into their kiss.   
He broke away. “Mmm I think you've got better at that, y-you been practising?”  
Alice giggled, her voice still breathy from her climax. “Wouldn't you like to know. Wait till you find out what I can do with my mouth”   
“Jesus...” Rick looked at her with lustful admiration. “Next time. Right now I-I need to fuck you.”

He carefully removed her hand from his pants then pushed himself off the bed to strip off the last of his clothing. He moved around the bed, erection bobbing almost comically, and began to route through his lab coat. Then he was back on the bed, settling himself between Alice's legs.

“Stick out your tongue” he demanded.   
“What? Why?” She asked confused.   
Rick suddenly rolled his hips, pressing his cock against her clit, making her throw her head back and moan.   
“Just do it”  
Alice narrowed her eyes quizzically but stuck her tongue out all the same. Rick placed a small pink pill into her mouth the forced her jaw closed with his hand.   
“Swallow”  
Alice coughed, the dry pill scratching her throat.  
“What was that?” she croaked.  
“Birth control. My own invention obviously. Protects against pregnancy and all known STDs, Earthly or otherwise, for up to a year.” He gave her a knowing smile as though he could tell she was mightily impressed, but Alice simply quirked an eyebrow and patted his arm.  
“Most people just bring condoms, Rick.”  
“Good job I'm not most people then!”

And with that, he reached down to line himself up with her entrance. He started slowly, easing her through the initial burn with soft kisses and a smoothing on her thigh. Alice bit her lip and tried to relax, getting used to his size again. Soon though he was buried to the hilt and stilled himself to kiss her deeply.   
“I've missed you” Alice whispered, almost hoping he wouldn't hear her.   
“Likewise” He replied with a genuine smile.

He pulled out again, nearly all the way, before slamming back in, forcing a strangled cry from Alice's lips. Their pace was rapid, him leaning on his forearms either side of her head, and her raking her nails down his back. Rick reached back to hook one of her legs over his hip allowing him to hit just the right spot inside her to send her spiralling towards another orgasm. 

Sweat dripped from Rick's hairline, his ragged breath warming her already flushed face. She couldn't hold on, the feeling, the moment, it was all too much. With one more well-positioned thrust, Rick sent her tumbling over the edge once more. She could feel her body clenching around him, and moments later, he snapped his hips forward and stilled, groaning loudly next to her ear as he came deep inside her. 

Rick sagged on top of her, their damp skin sticking them together as they regained their breath. After a few minutes, Rick flopped over onto his back, his now softened cock sliding out of her with an unpleasant squelch. 

Alice turned her head to look at him and felt suddenly very shy. Rick lay with his eyes closed, arm draped over his forehead, cheeks ruddy with exertion. He looked so different. This strange old man had replaced her young, vibrant lover. If she was honest, she kind of liked it, but that didn't change the fact they were basically strangers. And what do strangers do after sex?

As if to prove her point Rick heaved himself up from the bed with a grunt and started to gather his clothes, pausing briefly to gulp down the contents of his flask. Alice felt very naked all of a sudden. She stood and felt the telltale post-coital drip onto her inner thighs.

“I'll just go to the erm... bathroom.”   
She scurried from the room before her traitorous eyes started to well up. What a stupid idea this had been. She would just be another notch on the bed post it seemed. But what had she expected? Rick hadn't been the settling down type 40 years ago, and he certainly wasn't now. Stupid, stupid.

Alice cleaned herself up and threw on an oversized t-shirt from the airing cupboard then shuffled back to the bedroom expecting it to be empty. Much to her surprise, however, she found Rick already flat out in her bed, his flask next to him on the bedside table, clothes folded on the dresser. 

Once she recovered from the shock though, Alice reason that maybe he expected her to sleep else where, and she hovered awkwardly at the edge of the bed. Rick's voice from the depths of the quilt made her jump a foot in the air, she thought he was already asleep. 

“Ar-are you getting in then or wh _HHHAAAAT_ t? I already bag-bagsied the right side.”

As if by magic the left side of the cover was the turned down from the inside, and Alice awkwardly climbed inside. She flicked off the light and lay silently in the dark for a while, careful to keep to her side of the bed for fear of annoying the older man beside her. Her worry was quelled though when an exploratory hand snaked its way across her stomach and pulled her into the middle of the mattress. Rick pressed his chest firmly into her back and burrowed his nose into her hair inhaling deeply. 

“Goodnight, you fucking square.” he murmured.   
“Goodnight, Rick.” she replied, hiding her smile in her pillow.


	13. How Did I Get Back Into This Mess? I Kept Telling Myself The Temptations Would Do Me In, And They Did

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after the night before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the smut train keeps rolling! Thank you for all of the support I received after the last chapter, it really gave me the confidence to continue. Appreciate ya!
> 
> ALSO big shout out to the wonderful [Aud-and-Unusual](http://aud-and-unusual.tumblr.com/) who drew some [beautiful fanart](https://68.media.tumblr.com/bf3e3109334fbf5ec14287d903aca886/tumblr_owgk84iEJt1rsocico1_500.jpg) of Rick and Alice, check it out! I also want to mention [NerdyBirdy6602](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NerdyBirdy6602/pseuds/NerdyBirdy6602) and [Malib000](https://archiveofourown.org/users/malib000/pseuds/malib000) who have been pillars of support since the very beginning. Thank you!
> 
> Chapter Title From [Let Me In by Snowmine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q586jen-K40)

Before Rick had even opened his eyes he knew something was wrong. For starters, it was far too hot for him to be in his own bed. Pretty much the only thing in the house that Jerry was allowed to be in charge of was the thermostat and he liked to keep it just this side of freezing so he could feel important when people asked him to turn it up. This wasn't the first time in Rick's life he'd woken up naked, sweaty, and disorientated, but he couldn't recall going anywhere unusual or dangerous last night. 

He cracked his eyes open and immediately regretted it as the blinding light coming in through the window made his head pound, suggesting that he hadn't quite shaken off his hangover. He turned over away from the light and was greeted with a mess of red hair. Oh. The cogs inside he's head finally got up to top speed and the picture reel of the previous evening's events started to play. 

Rick squeezed his eyes tight shut. He couldn't even pretend he'd still been drunk by the time he'd arrived at the flat, there was no excuse for what had happened. Rick lay as still as possible and focused on the ticklish drip of sweat down the back of his neck, pulling the covers back ever so slightly to get some air. 

He had been delivered home by Morty completely catatonic, and was put straight to bed like an errant child. Not that he was complaining. He'd managed to sleep off the worst of his intoxication and was well on the road to sobriety when he'd awoken to the heavenly smell of a cooked breakfast. Despite it being 7pm, the Smiths had reversed their day for him without complaint. Beth knew how to look after a drunk, just like her Mother. 

The meal had started off tense, no one wanting to broach the subject of Rick's disappearance, so he did it for them. He had no time for grudges.

“Look, I-I-I know some of you might to pissed at me, and I get it. N-not that I'm encouraging you to hold me to ransom for everything I do that doesn't fit with your sensibilities, but... If I worried you, I'm sorry. But I'm back now, so that's all water- it's water under the bridge.” There, that should placate them enough to get them off his back. From the way Beth's eyes were starting to well up, she, at the very least, had bought it. 

He'd taken himself off to the garage not long after, though he'd had no task in mind to complete, so it was a welcome distraction when Morty had shown up. 

“Wh-wh-whaddya want, M-Morty?” He'd asked in what was probably a quite unconvincing effort at annoyance. The mother of all hangovers was messing with his ability to be scathing.

Morty silently placed an Alka Salsa in front of the circuit board he'd been pretending to solder. His Grandson leant back against the workbench as Rick tried not to look at him too fondly. What had he done to deserve that kid? 

“This has to stop, Rick. Y-you're gonna kill yourself if your carry on like this.” Morty said, crossing his arms.  
“Gotta go somehow, Morty, might as well go out smiling.” He drained the effervescent liquid from the glass with a shudder.  
“But you're not smiling, Rick! You're obviously very unhappy, a-a-and it's making everyone else unhappy too. You need to get your shit together.”  
“Wh-wh-w-what do you think I'm trying to do here, Morty?” He sighed, slumping back in his desk chair.  
“Well, whatever you're doing, it's not working. Y-y-you're meant to be a genius, that's what you're always telling everyone, figure it out.” Morty shrugged.  
Rick glanced over at Morty with a raised eyebrow. “No one's infallible, Morty.” The 'not even me' was left silent.  
Morty shook his head and pushed himself off the desk. “Well, have you tried just talking to her? Being honest?” He headed towards the garage door, “A-and, take a shower, you stink to high heaven.” 

And so that was what Rick had set out to do, be honest, and while he hadn't had the intention of ending up in Alice's bed, he couldn't quite bring himself to regret it all that much. He forced his eyes open again and pushed himself up onto his elbow so he could see her more clearly. His joints popped as he moved and he felt the almost enjoyable ache in his shoulders and arms that came from holding his weight up last night as he ploughed into the beautiful creature which lay next to him. 

Alice was sound asleep, judging by the light it must only be around 6am. Her fiery auburn hair fanned out in sharp contrast against the white pillowcase, her mouth slightly agape with a little drool on her lip. She looked completely adorable. Rick adjusted himself so he could lie close to her, being careful not to poke her in the back with his morning wood. 

He'd known as soon as she'd opened the door he was done for. He'd spent so long digesting the whole saga of her abduction and subsequent return in various dive bars around the galaxy, but despite all his rumination, he'd still been under the impression he could resist being pulled into the bottomless pit that was his feelings for Alice Montgomery. He'd still believed it when he'd pushed her doorbell, but seeing that wide-eyed little face staring back at him from across the threshold had broken the last thread of his resistance. He'd passed over the event horizon and now there was no escaping the pull of her gravity. 

Rick brushed his nose along the nape of her neck breathing in the scent of sleep. He loved the smell of her, especially in the mornings, warm skin and fabric softener with a hint of fresh sweat. He'd had no intention of staying here after their little transgression. In the few seconds of intense, horrifying clarity that followed an orgasm, he'd felt the first whispers of a full-scale freakout coming on. How could he have let this happen? This was insanity! But as he slowly came down from his high he'd reasoned that it wouldn't be so bad if he kept an element of clinical distance in their relationship, especially in those sensitive post-coital moments. 

But then he'd heard the sniffling from the bathroom, his eyes had settled on Alice's discarded clothing and he'd had a change of heart. Her time away may have hardened her in a way Rick still did not fully understand, but deep down there was still an element of 'small town virgin' about her that he couldn't resist. In for a penny in for a pound he'd supposed.

So that was how he found himself enjoying these quiet moments, remembering how much he'd loved them 40 years ago, admiring Alice's sleeping form with the smell of sex still clinging to their skin. 

He gently stroked down the side of her neck with his fingertips, admiring the way the little hairs stood on end over the light purple bruises he'd left with his teeth. The sight of those marks tugged at him somewhere below his navel, giving him an almost neanderthalic sense of pride. She was his, no one else could touch her. Of course, logically he knew he was giving in to his baser evolutionary urges, but he couldn't ignore the fact the idea was making his morning erection a little reluctant to wane. 

Alice looked so young while she slept. She looked a damn sight younger than Rick anyway, but she had aged a little in the 10 or so years she'd experienced away from him. She couldn't be more than 29 but her face had that haggard look of someone who was under constant stress. The dark circles under her eyes were a little too pronounced, the first faint beginnings of frown lines had started to appear, and she was just slightly too thin for her stature. But in sleep she looked positively ethereal.

Either way, Rick didn't care. He'd had his way with those much younger and much older, men, women, beings of different worlds, different dimensions, more eyes, fewer limbs, it was all the same to him. But why she allowed him near her, he had no idea. Young woman with a second chance at life and she'd chosen to stick around with _him_? He decided not to dwell on that too much. In his heart of hearts, he was a selfish son of a bitch and he was having too much fun to worry about ruining young lives, why start now?

Snow had begun to fall outside the window and despite the warmth of the bed, there was a chill in the air now that he'd shaken off the heat of sleep. He slipped his arm around Alice's waist where her t-shirt had ridden up, pressing his bare chest to her back, and ghosted his hand under her clothing and up her ribcage to settle it lightly over her breast. He was bored now, he wanted a little entertainment. 

Nuzzling his nose into her neck again he began to place soft kisses over the little violet marks while his fingers began to play with her nipple. He pinched and rolled it gently between his thumb and forefinger. When it hardened under his touch he began a ritual of flicking it with his fingertip then circling it with the pad of his thumb. Alice stirred but stayed asleep, though she obviously wasn't oblivious to his ministration as she began to make little breathy noises that made Rick grin smugly. 

Before he met Alice, Rick had been more of a 'Wham Bam Thank You Mam' type, but she had opened his eyes to the enjoys of sticking around for morning sex. He'd returned to his old ways following her abduction, but seeing as he was already enjoying breaking his no sleepover rule, he may as well see how far he could take this thing. Feeling as though the situation needed to be moved along a bit quicker he started to subtly grind his half-hard cock against her bare ass and scraped his teeth along her neck in the hopes she'd wake up. It worked. Alice jolted awake, clearly just as confused as Rick had been. 

“Ah! Hmm, wha- Rick?” She glanced over her shoulder at him and he smiled toothily at her.  
“Heeeeey!” Letting out a throaty laugh when he saw the other shoe drop in her head.  
Alice assessed the situation she found herself in - a hand up her top and mildly aroused genitalia against her naked backside - and blushed.  
“Hey!” She squeaked then bury her face in the covers again.  
“Oh come on! D-don't get all-all shy on me now” Rick said hooking his chin over her shoulder.  
“Were you watching me sleep?!” She squawked, muffled by the duvet.  
“Maybe...” Rick continued to kiss her shoulder. “I've always liked watching you sleep, you look so innocent, makes it all the more enjoyable to know how much I've corrupted you.” He pinched her nipple hard making her arch out from her hiding place and hum pleasurably.  
“Fucking creep, why are you still here again?” She laughed. 

Rick brushed his fingers over her abused nipple, stroking it better and revelling in her little shivers.  
“Well _you_ insisted on staging a little conniption in the bathroom when you thought I was leaving, so how could I not stay?” His smug smile returned when Alice blushed again, raising her shoulder up as a barricade against him.  
“Oh yeah, laugh it up. Fuck me for feeling a little delicate after the first meaningful sex I've had in like a decade, right?” She huffed.  
Rick moved away from her so he could pull on her shoulder until she was flat on her back. He swung his leg over her, pinning her down as he loomed over her, keeping the duvet wrapped tightly around them.  
“I-I didn't say I didn't like it” Then he swooped down and pressed his lips to hers. 

Much to his surprise, however, Alice gave a muffled yell and pushed him away.  
“No! I've got rancid morning breath!” she said indignantly, but she laughed at the incredulous face he pulled.  
“Sweetheart, my breath constantly smells like stale alcohol, I don't give a fuck what your mouth tastes like.”  
Alice wrinkled her nose in a half laugh half grimace.  
“So. Sexy.” She said in a pantomime of seriousness.  
“Fine!” He leant over to the bedside table and snagged his flask, mumbling about over sensitive women, and took a good couple of swigs before offering it to Alice.  
“Rick it's not even 7am yet...”  
Rick deadpanned. “I'm an alcoholic, shoot me.”  
He took one more big sip then re-screwed the cap and leant down once more to kiss her. When Alice finally opened up to allow him in, he let some of the liquor he'd been holding in his mouth pour into hers. She grimaced but swallowed it anyway.  
“Gross” she coughed as the unexpected shot burnt her throat.  
“So is kissing my daughter goodnight with the same mouth I eat pussy with, it's better to just not think about it.” And with that, he was back to sliding his tongue between her lips and toying with the inside of her mouth. Alice sighed into the kisses while Rick luxuriated in the feeling of having her body writhing under him and knowing he was the cause of it. 

He pulled away, sitting back on her thighs then slide both hands over her ribs, pushing up her t-shirt as he went until it was bunched around her armpits so he could admire the way her tits fit perfectly in his hands. He brushed over her nipples again with his thumbs watching closely as she arched and moaned in appreciation. He still couldn't quite believe he had managed to get this hot young thing underneath him.

“Jesus, you're like a horny teenager” He marvelled  
“Ha! Says you!” She grasped the erection that was hovering over her stomach and started to stroke him firmly.  
Rick tossed his head back and groaned low in his throat.  
“Wh-what were you saying last night, something about being a pro in the oral department, think it's time to put your money where your mouth is, literally.” He gave her a shark-like smile.  
Alice raised an eyebrow. “Did you practise that line while I was asleep?”  
Before Rick had time to come back with a witty retort she had flipped them over and was gliding down his body until she was level with his cock. 

Now that was a beautiful sight to behold, Rick thought to himself as he crossed his arms behind his head, settling back against the pillows to watch the show unfold. Alice grasped his shaft gently at the base then gave the underside of the head a broad lick, flicking her eyes up to meet his gaze as she did. 

The light-hearted banter was gone, the humour in her eyes had been replaced by sultry determination that made Rick's stomach muscles tighten. Alice brushed her lips against the tip of his cock, and Rick could see them come away shiny with precum. Then without warning, she enveloped the head in the tight, hot grip of her mouth, swirling her tongue around him. The sudden movement made Rick gasp. Fuck. She meant business. 

Rick reached down to tangle a hand in her hair, scraping his nails across her scalp and pulling sharply at the roots when she slid her mouth down until her lips reached the hand that was stroking at the base.  
He watched through half-lidded eyes as she pulled back up, wriggling her tongue against the underside and hollowing her cheeks, her lips stretched magnificently around his girth. He wasn't going to last long, she was certainly living up to her claims and that sparked a question in his mind which he made a mental note to ask when his brain was less sex-addled. 

Rick breath was starting to come in short sharp gasps as Alice bobbed her head and worked her hand in an expert fashion, she'd even started to fondle his balls just the way he liked it.  
“Babe I-I'm... oooh fuck, Ali I-I-I'm gonna cum if you don't-”  
His admission only made her redouble her effort, slipping down even further on his shaft and teasing the back of her throat with the tip of his cock. He felt the powerful muscles flex around him and he arched his back as heat began to build rapidly in the pit of his stomach. Alice obviously sensed his impending orgasm as she reached back with one of the fingers playing with his testicles and rubbed firmly against his perineum. That did it. Rick felt his balls tighten as he gripped the sheets in white knuckled hands and groaned, shooting his load into her warm, wet mouth. 

Rick sank back into the covers like chocolate melting on a hot surface as Alice carefully slid his softening cock from her mouth. Rick's limp hand dropped from where it had been tugging at her hair as she crawled back up his body to lay beside him. He glanced across at her and rolled his eyes at her smug smile.  
“Yeah, yeah. You proved your point” he said, pulling her head down into a chaste, breathless kiss.  
The sweet moment was shattered however by the alarm clock screaming into life beside them. Rick slapped his hands over his ears in horror while Alice sprang from the bed to turn it off.  
“Right, times up, I've gotta get ready for work.”  
“What? Nooooo” Rick complained petulantly. _He_ decided when he was done with someone, not arbitrary commitments like _work_.  
“Sorry!” Alice called from where she was rooting through the wardrobe, although she didn't sound all that sorry, in fact, if anything she sounded amused. 

She headed for the door but Rick called after her.  
“W-wait, just one- I have a question for you.”  
“I think it's a bit early to be thinking about marriage Rick.” She said, trying to hide her smile at his irritated look.  
“Ha ha, fuck you. You said before that last night was the first _meaningful_ sex you'd had in a decade, does that mean you've had _un_ meaningful sex? When? Where? Is that how you got so good at giving head?”  
Alice raised an eyebrow. “That's four questions, Rick” Then turned back towards the bathroom.  
“Wait!” Rick jumped out of bed, not minding his state of undress, and caught her at the bathroom door. This was the second time he'd had to stop her escaping through doors in as many days, it was becoming a habit.  
“Is it though?” He asked, more out of curiosity than jealous, that was he told himself anyway.  
“It's better to just not think about it” She winked at him.

Rick tried a different tactic. “Ok I'll do you a deal, y-you can ask me something, anything you like. Then you gotta answer.” He brushed down her face with the back of his hand in an effort to distract her from asking anything too personal.  
Alice narrowed her eyes contemplating the tempting offer, or maybe his motives.  
“Ok. Tell me how you and Diane got together.”

Rick's hand stilled on her cheek and his eyes widened imperceptibly, but he knew she noticed. She had as keen an eye as any he'd known. She wasn't playing a game, she'd taken it as an opportunity to look for weaknesses. And she'd found one. Once again he had underestimated her, to his detriment.  
She patted his chest with her hand and gave him a look somewhere between joy and annoyance.  
“See? You keep your secrets Rick, and I'll keep mine.”

And with that she turned and shut the bathroom door in his face, leaving Rick with the old adage about playing with fire floating through his head.


	14. I Don't Know What I'm Supposed To Do, Haunted By The Ghost Of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another Flashback

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in as many days?! I'm spoiling you guys ;) fair warning though this chapter is kinda dark. I don't want to give too much away cos spoilers, but if you're sensitive to mental health issues please check the revised tags and proceed with caution. Also, I've upped the rating as I think the last few chapters have pushed the story over into the Explicit category.
> 
> Chapter Title From [The Night We Met by Lord Huron](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGF7PswOENQ)

_8th July 1976_

Behind closed eyes, Rick was drowning, being pulled down further and further into the black abyss. He had no knowledge of how he got here or why, all he could focus on was the burning in his lungs and throat like he'd swallowed glass and it was tearing him apart from the inside. He tried to move his arms and legs to swim up towards the surface but they were dead weights hanging uselessly at his sides. He tried to breathe, inhale the water surrounding him to get this hell over with quicker, but he couldn't control his diaphragm. The light of the surface glowed temptingly above him and he willed himself to reach towards it. Miraculously it seemed to be working, the light grew brighter, all pink and red like stripe lights through eyelids. Then he broke through the surface and entered a nightmare far worse than the one he'd just left.

Rick's eyes flew open and all of his senses were assaulted at once. Scorching white light hurt his eyes; blaring, incessant beeping made his eardrums pound so hard he thought they might bleed; the smell of carbolic soap and disinfectant burnt his nostrils. A flurry of activity caught his attention but most of his brain was focused on panicking. Despite the fact he hadn't actually been drowning, he still couldn't breathe properly, something was blocking his throat, something huge. He began to thrash around and scratch at his neck trying to work out why he was suffocating. Then a voice broke through the wailing alarms, a voice so insistent, yet soft and kind it almost made him stop attacking himself.

“Richard? Richard listen to me. You're in the hospital, you have a breathing tube in. We're going to take it out but you have to calm down, Richard. Listen to me. Richard? Help me restrain him, Paul.”

Then his shoulders were forced down into the mattress while the obstruction in his throat was pulled at a horrifyingly slow pace, scraping up his trachea then out of his mouth, making him retch and cough. But finally, after what felt like an eternity, he could breathe. He gulped in ragged lung fulls while the people bustled around him, switching of the alarms and altering various monitors.

Suddenly a stern looking man with a large moustache and neatly combed hair took over his field of vision. Despite his austere air, he spoke in a friendly voice.   
“Hello, Richard, my name's Dr Barnet. Do you know where you are?”  
Rick tried to respond but all that came out was a wheezing noise like a party blower with a hole in it. He swallowed dryly and tried again.   
“H-hospital” He managed to croak out.  
Dr Barnet smiled, “That's right, and do you know why you're here? Do you remember what happened?”  
Rick squeezed his eyes shut and began to search his mind for clues as to how he ended up in this situation. He'd been at home probably, he didn't leave the house much anymore. Why? He had an empty feeling in his chest but he couldn't remember the reason for it, just that it was familiar. Then slowly the pieces began to slot into place. She was gone. Alice was gone, and life no longer held any sway over him. It was pointless to carry on... Rick's eyes widened and his mouth fell open a little. He looked down at himself, all skin and bone in a hospital gown, with thick bandages wound tightly around his forearms. He looked back up at the doctor.  
“I-I killed myself” He rasped  
Barnet nodded, his eyes a little harder.   
“Tried” he corrected. 

Rick felt incredibly tired all of a sudden and his eyes started to droop as the doctor carried out various awareness test until he was satisfied there was no obvious damage to his faculties.  
“Get some sleep, Richard, I'll see you tomorrow.”  
“It'sssRick” he managed to slur out as his eyes finally slid closed, just managing to catch Dr Barnet's rueful smile as he closed the door.

 

.

 

\----------

 

.

 

_10th July 1976_

“He's asleep, but you can go in and sit with him”  
“Thank you, Nurse Mayweather”

Rick stirred from the first restful sleep he'd had in months, but kept his eyes closed and listened while this unknown visitor moved quietly around the room. He heard the scraping of metal chair legs on linoleum flooring, the gentle setting down of a bag, the swish of a coat thrown around the back of the chair, and a soft sigh of a female as she sat down. 

“Oh, Rick, you stupid bastard,” said a familiar but unexpected voice.  
“That's not a very nice thing to say to a sick person,” he said thickly.  
“Holy Mary, I thought you were asleep!” 

Rick squinted his eyes open and took in the figure sitting next to his bed in the dark room. The only light was coming from the corridor through the window in the closed door, making Diane's blonde hair look like a halo around her head. He pushed himself into a sitting position stiffly, coughing with the strain it put on his chest.   
“Could you?” He asked reluctantly, gesturing to the jug of water on the bedside. He hated being an invalid. Diane jumped to the task filling the small glass and bringing it up to his face, but Rick snatched it from her.   
“I'm not retarded I can drink myself, I just couldn't reach the jug” he snapped hoarsely. “Put the light on.”

Diane made no comment, not that she normally would, she was far too polite, weak in other words, not like... Rick shut down that train of thought. He sipped from the glass before handing it back to her and noticed her staring at his bandaged arm.   
“You wanna take a picture or something?” He huffed.   
Diane pursed her lips and folded her arms.  
“Really done a number on yourself haven't you? The nurse said you slit all the way to your elbows _and_ took a massive overdose.”  
“Well you know me, I-I don't do things by halves,” he said bitterly, turning away from her to stare at his reflection in the dark window with the city lights twinkling beyond. “What is this anyway, an intervention? Couldn't round up anyone else that cared? Or are you trying to save my soul like a good Catholic girl?” He was riled, he didn't need little miss perfect with her stupid round face judging him right now.   
“No, I just wanted to visit” she replied evenly in her sweet little voice. God, she was annoying.   
“W-well, you didn't have to. _Really_.” He turned back and glared at her.   
She shrugged. “It's no bother, I'm doing my placement here. I'm in the samples lab upstairs until September, then I'm going back to college.”  
“Sounds like a riot,” Rick said, thoroughly uninterested. 

An awkward silence fell over the room before Diane, ever the eager small talker made the unfortunate decision to break it.   
“Apparently your Mom was her earlier, but you were asleep”  
Rick stiffened at the mention of his Mother. “Good. She needn't have bothered coming either.”  
“The nurse said your parents are paying all your medical bills”   
“W-well, they're wasting their money,” he said tersely. “Bit of a lose lipped nurse they've got working here” he scoffed, hoping to shut this conversation down as quickly as possible.

Diane must have sensed his discomfort at the subject as another pregnant silence settled over them. Rick began to fidget, this was more time than he'd ever wanted to spend alone with Diane, normally Alice would be there as a mediator. Alice...

“Look, th-th-this is awkward as fuck, can you just leave?” He begged her.   
Diane sighed and looked at him with earnest eyes.  
“I'm worried about you, Rick,” she said in a small voice.   
Rick scoffed. “No shit, I just tried to commit suicide. I'm asking you _not_ to be worried, you shouldn't even care! I killed your best friend for Christ's sake!” His voice cracked before he reached the end of his sentence.   
Diane regarded him with a sad smile. “Well see I don't think that's true.”  
Rick barked a cruel laugh then regretted it when it irritated his recently intubated throat.  
“Why? Everyone else does. Her parents do, the _police_ do, but they can't prove it. How can you be so sure, hmm? Maybe I stashed her body under my fucking patio and you're sat here trying to get me some TLC!” He descended into a coughing fit, promoting Diane to calmly hand him the water again. 

She didn't flinch at his harsh words like he thought she would, she just looked at him with pitying eyes. He didn't need her fucking pity.   
“Well,” She began matter of factly, “because I know how much you loved her, and I know you could never kill her. And I also know that you're a brilliant man and you make some wild and wonderful things, but it doesn't surprise me that one of those things went wrong, something that was beyond your control.” Her voice was always so calm and just high-pitched enough to grate on Rick's nerves. He said nothing in response.   
After a beat, she continued. “I know you don't like me, Rick-”  
“I-”  
“No. Don't try and deny it, I know you don't. But that doesn't matter now, I think-” She voice choked a little with emotion. “I think Alice would want me to look out for you.”  
Rick clenched his jaw. “I-I-I don't need looking after.”  
Diane looked around the hospital room pointedly then looked him dead in the eye.   
“I think we both know that's not true.”  
Rick sighed and let his head fall back against the pillow, his eyes falling shut. He was too drained to argue with her.   
“Do-do whatever makes you happy, Diane.”  
“I will.” He could hear the triumph in her voice. 

Rick opened his eyes again and looked at her, she was a sweet kid, even if she was annoying as fuck, she meant well he guessed.   
“I don't wanna be rude, actually who am I kidding. Leave, I'm tired.”  
“Of course!” She stood and put on her black duffel coat. Before she turned to leave however she reached out tentatively and squeezed Rick's long, thin fingers very carefully in one of her petite hands.   
“It's going to be ok, Rick.” And then she was gone. 

He was too shocked to respond, the warmth her hand left behind mesmerised him, even while the nurse came in to give him more pain meds and switch off his light. Her touch was so tender, it was the first time he'd been touched like that since... 

Even though tiredness ate away at his brain like a parasite, Rick stayed awake for hours. He fiddled with the bandages on his left arm until they came loose, then he fiddled with the sharp stitches along the ragged wound until blood started to bead around them. He stared out of the window up at the stars like he had done every night since she'd gone, while silent tears rolled down his cheeks that had nothing to do with the pain. 

 

.

 

\----------

 

.

 

_16th July 1976_

Rick sat on the edge of his hospital bed while Dr Barnet added the finishing touches to his discharge papers. He handed them over along with a bag of bandages for his arms and a stern look.

“You're a young man, Rick, with a brilliant mind. I want you to keep seeing the psychiatrist.”  
Rick rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I don't think the shrink is working for me Doc, I'll be fine.”  
Barnet pressed his lips into a thin line under his bushy moustache then clapped his on Rick's shoulder firmly.  
“Well, just remember you've got your whole life ahead of you. You don't know what the future might hold. Don't give up hope.” He raised his thick eyebrows and gave Rick a meaningful look. 

Rick gave a sharp nod and turned to pack up his things, ignoring the knock on the open door behind him.   
“Ah! He's your ride, Rick” The doctor said jovially.  
Rick turned to see Diane standing in the doorway wearing a cutesy summer dress, patent leather handbag clutched in driving gloved hands. Her get-up was a jarring contrast to Rick's tight ripped jeans and oversized sweater.   
He grimaced and groaned at the sight of her.   
“Ah Jesus, does it have to be you?” He demanded sullenly.  
“Oh well no, of course it doesn't,” she said with mocking kindness. “You're welcome to take the bus” she smiled perkily.   
Rick stuffed the rest of his things into his bag and stomped off into the corridor.  
“Fine! But I'm in charge of the radio!”

Dr Barnet chuckled to himself and shook his head as he watched the two of them stroll down the corridor. He would remember Rick Sanchez, and he tried to tell himself he would never see him here again. But he wasn't convinced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S I just wanted to say that I had no idea the song this chapter title is taken from had anything to do with '13 Reasons Why'. I haven't seen the show but because of the similarities in subject matter, I wanted to explicitly distance myself from it.


	15. No One Will Ever Love You For Everything You Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Truth will always shatter the illusion of happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Woohoo! And guess what? It's my birthday! So this is my gift to you guys :)
> 
> Sorry for the extended break I took, I wasn't meant to be this long but I got wrapped up in writing a SumRick fic.
> 
> I want to give a big shout out to my wonderful friend [Malib000](https://archiveofourown.org/users/malib000) for all of her encouragement and for betaing this chapter. She's the best :)
> 
> Also [Aud-And-Unusual](http://aud-and-unusual.tumblr.com/) has done some more amazing [line art](http://aud-and-unusual.tumblr.com/post/166625486809/for-panthaprincess-here-on-tumblr-this-is-just) check it out! Thank you to them :)
> 
> So here it is, finally! Let me know what you think :)
> 
> Chapter Title From [Song For Caden by Jon Brion](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AcNqqfRq-AQ)

Rick topped up his mug for the fifth time since he woke up, at this point, it was more whiskey than coffee but still nowhere near the level of inebriation he needed to get through the day. The 25th of December, the most overrated day of the year, made only marginally better by the increased acceptability for daytime drinking. Not that it stopped him any other day of the year. 

The house was still quiet, Rick had risen early to try and get a good buzz going before the festive merriments were forced upon him. He had planned to spend the day with Alice, preferably between her thighs, but when they'd arrived back at the house last night after taking Beth and the kids to see the Winter Festival lights on Oopsalon-Creeve his daughter had had the dazzling idea to invite Alice to spend Christmas Day with them as one big happy family. Rick cringed violently at the mere thought of the many hours there were ahead of him and took another gulp of coffee infused Scotch.

He didn't blame Alice for being too polite to say no, but resentment was running high for all the people under that particular roof, which on this occasion did include his feisty little... Lover? Was he really going to say that? Jesus. He leaned his elbows on the table in front of him and massaged his temples. 

He didn't know what to call her, but he certainly wasn't going to allude to any change in their relationship in front of his family, not yet anyway. He knew his grandkids suspected something was different from the way they snickered behind their hands and gave each other knowing looks every time he unconsciously touched the young woman or was anything but scathing towards her. But Beth was a different kettle of fish, she was irrational and gave too much weight to unimportant things like defining relationships. She'd just freak out and feel a misplaced sense of betrayal. More to the point, any declaration of affection would just sour this whole thing, give Alice the wrong idea about the level of commitment to expect, make it all too _real_. He shuddered again, he wasn't quite ready to shatter that particular illusion just yet. He was happy, and the less he thought about that the more likely it was to continue. 

He got up to refill his mug, going for a straight half and half, erring on the side of more liquor, and leant against the counter to check his emails. It was mostly spam, coupons for off-world chemical suppliers and pizza places, a couple of messages for other Rick's including a round-robin of an amateur porno Zeta-95 and G-4427 had made – Fucking weirdos, and some more updates from Sourisson which Rick scanned briefly. Nothing too alarming, not really anyway. Rathbone's contacts had been supplying him with a steady stream of information about NRIF, but more than half had gone quiet in the past several weeks, including all those from his home planet of Taarera Murinae, prompting him to take a trip there within the next few days. But that was all par for the course; informants disappeared and reappeared all the time and it was not something Rick needed to be concerned about. The only thing the piqued his interest even slightly was the fact that a pack of Gromflomites had been spotted less than 50 light years from Earth. It was close, but not close enough to pose any real threat he decided, closing his email app and draining his cup. But something that smelt distinctly like denial was burrowing it's way up from the back of Rick's mind. Nothing a little carnal respite wouldn't fix. 

He wandered through the quiet house to his bedroom. He'd kept up the pretence of propriety by sleeping in the den last night, and he tried desperately to rein in his eagerness to see Alice again. Closing the door softly behind him, he eyed her sleeping form in the gloom. He could have woken her up sweetly, maybe with a cup of coffee of her own, a gentle kiss on her forehead, but that wasn't really his style. He crept towards the bed quietly, not wanting to disturb her before the time was right and grasped the corner of the swamp green comforter. With the swiftness and grace of a matador, Rick pulled sharply, wrenching the cover off her, causing a wave of bitter chill to wash over her body, which was clad rather ineffectively against the cold in cobbled together sleep shorts and vest borrowed from Summer and Beth. 

Alice gasped loudly and sat bolt upright, eyes wide with panic as she tried to orientate herself. Rick's belly laugh brought her back down to Earth with a thump. 

“What the fuck, you asshole?!” She yelled  
“Shh, shush will you! Y-you'll wake them all up” Rick replied in hushed tones between barely suppressed laughter.  
Alice huffed out an angry breath and folded her arms petulantly.  
“I get night terrors, Rick. Pretty inconsiderate way to wake me up.”  
Rick rolled his eyes but felt a small pang of guilt, time for a little well choreographed seduction to butter her up again.

He clambered onto the end of the bed and crawled up to her, smirking as she turned her face away and huffed again.  
“Come on, i-i-it was a little bit funny,” he cajoled, rubbing the tip of his long nose up the side of her face and into her hairline, inhaling the warm spicy smell of her shampoo.  
“Fuck you.”  
“Hmm, I-I'd much rather fuck you, Sweetheart.” When even that got no positive response he sat back on his heel and sighed.  
“Ali, I'm sorry ok? Jesus, I didn't know you'd become such a buzzkill,” He began a sulk of his own. “This day will be even more of a-a-a shit-show if you're having a hissy fit.”  
Suddenly an evil smile bloomed across Alice's sleep-softened face.  
“Oh yeah!” She said slowing, turning round to look at him again. “Merry Christmas, Rick,” she said will all the venom of a brutal insult. 

Rick growled. “Get bent,” he bit back.  
But Alice laughed, reminding him that his discomfort would always be the thing to bring her round. In an instant he was back on top of her, pushing her down, dragging her hands over her head and pinning them to the pillow.  
“What's the matter, Rick? Not feeling the festive spirit?” Alice teased even from her disadvantaged position.  
“No, but I'll feel your festive spirit! Wait... Th-th-that don't make any sense...”  
Alice cackled her distinctive laugh from underneath him, wrapping both legs around his waist and pulling him down further on top of her. Why did she always end up getting the upper hand?

In an effort to try and reassert his dominance, Rick knelt up again, grabbing Alice's legs from around his waist and flipping her over, then roughly tugging down her sleep shorts to expose her bare backside. 

Without ceremony he bent his head down and sank his teeth into the plumpest part of her left ass cheek, causing Alice to squeal into the pillow. Rick released her from his dental grip and flattened himself over her left side, half lying on the bed, half on her back.

“Now, you're gonna to be very quiet while I make you cum on my fingers, ok?” Rick whispered huskily in her ear, then started to bite at her shoulder.  
Alice gave a muffled groan at his words and Rick smiled wickedly against her skin.  
“Y-you-you've gotta do better than that i-if you want me to touch your pussy,” he jeered.  
She bit her lip and nodded, squeezing her eyes tight shut in an effort not to make a sound. 

Rick pulled up the loose vest so he could glide his fingers up and down her spine, making her shiver under his touch. Eventually, he reached the swell of her behind and gave it a firm, ringing slap, testing her resolve. A breathy little noise escaped he lips but nothing that could be described as loud.

“Very good, Baby, I'm impressed,” He praised, earning him another little noise as she basked in his compliment.  
He reached out with his right foot and pushed her legs further apart, allowing him to crept his fingers down over her asshole pausing to tease it slightly, then continued until they were enveloped by her dripping wet folds.  
“Fuck, i-i-it's always a surprise just how wet you get for me,” He laughed, pushing two of his long fingers through her slickness to toy with her clit, circling and rubbing until she was writhing under him, almost bucking him off. 

“I-I know you wanna moan, Baby, but you've got to be quiet.” He cooed, not letting up on his assault until she was panting quietly under him.  
It wasn't often he got to dominate in bed, Alice had always had her submissive tendencies, but on the whole, she couldn't stop running her mouth long enough to be overwhelmed. Occasionally though she allowed him to have his fun. Although he was under no illusion that she wasn't still the one in complete control, but a man could dream couldn't he?

Without warning he thrust his two fingers into her pussy, hoping to catch her off guard and elicit some sort of sound, but Alice managed to keep it together, gripping the pillow until her knuckles turned white and breathing heavily into the down filling. 

“You'd doing so well, Sweetheart, such a good girl aren't you?” He groaned, thoroughly getting into his role.  
He fingered her at an almost aggressive speed, hitting her G-spot over and over again until her inner walls began to quiver.  
“Ri-Rick,” she whispered hoarsely, turning her head so he could see her face better.  
She was flushed and sweaty and looked utterly debauched. Rick's erection throbbed painfully at the sight of her.  
“Yeah? What is it, Baby? You wanna cum?” She nodded furiously, breath coming out in sharp little pants. Rick kissed her sweaty forehead affectionately.  
“Cum for me, Ali” he muttered. And cum she did. Her vagina clenched tightly around his pistoning fingers as she uttered a strangled noise into the pillow. 

Rick flipped her over again and began to shower her with praise and loving kisses, coaxing her down from her orgasm. But rather than sated she looked up lustfully into his eyes.  
“Fuck me, Rick” She demanded.  
Rick moaned low in his throat. “See, this is why I ke-keep you around!”  
He scrambled to undo his belt, not bothering to remove any of his clothes, and pulled down his fly.  
Before he could get his weeping erection out of his underwear, however, an ear-splitting scream echoed through the house, like someone had run over a cat with a lawnmower. 

“What the fuck?!” Rick yelled, falling back off the bed in an effort to do his trousers back up again and throw himself out the door at the same time.  
He stumbled out into the hall, Alice hot on his heels wrapping herself in Rick's robe, as they followed the anguished cries to the garage. 

Swinging open the door Rick was greeted with a sight that could only be described as Pablo Escobar's wet dream. Every surface was covered in a fine dusting of white powder, it billowed through the air in acrid clouds choking the pair as they entered, and in the middle of it all was a pyjama clad Morty, screaming and crying and rubbing his eyes red raw.

“Wh-wh-wh-what the fuck happened, Morty?” Rick shouted angrily over the cacophony, grabbing Morty's arms and yanking his hands away from his eyes so he could inspect them.  
“Th-th-th-th-th-the-the” Morty stammered and coughed.  
“Spit it out, Morty, I need to know what happened so I can help you!” He dragged the boy over to his workbench, laying his hand flat over a particular panel to open his emergency decontamination unit.

Morty drew in a ragged breath and tried again.  
“Th-th-the washing bot you m-m-made, before you dis-disappeared, i-i-i-i-i-t blew up, Rick! Ahhhh fuck, there's washing powder in my eyes!”  
Rick heaved a sigh of relief just as Beth, Jerry, and Summer exploded into the room as well to investigate the commotion.  
“It's fine,” Rick said before they could ask. He pointed to the small spherical robot on the floor that was spinning in circles like a dying fly, it's retractable arms tying themselves in knots. “WashBot had a spaz attack and tried to blind Morty while he was doing laundry.”  
He grabbed various bottles from his kit and started to mix them in one of the few remaining clean bowls, then began to bathe Morty's eyes gently, careful not to hurt him more than necessary. 

“Morty, it's Christmas Day, why are you doing laundry?” Beth asked in a tired, puzzled voice.  
Rick glanced around at the washing machine to see Morty's sheets sticking out of the top and bit his lip in an attempt not the laugh. Morty, on the other hand, was not laughing, rather he was imploding with embarrassment.  
“I-I-I-I don't have to ex-explain to you why I'm washing- My-my business is my own, Mom! Sometimes a-a guys gotta wash his sheets, a-a-and you're not meant to question it! I-I-I-I can do-do washing anytime I please!” He wailed.  
“Alright, Morty, we get it.” Rick snapped, but reached down where no one could see with his free hand to squeeze Morty's arm reassuringly. 

“VacuuBot!” Rick shouted when he'd finished cleaning his idiot Grandson's eyes. A similar sphere-like robot to the one on the floor floated into the garage, it's hose arms flapping behind it. “Clean this up will you? I-i-it looks like Lindsay Lohan's living room in here.” He paused, “Are-are people still doing Lohan jokes?”  
“Dad, is that thing safe?” Beth eyed the floating robot suspiciously as it began to vacuum up the washing powder from every nook and cranny of Rick's workshop.  
“Perfectly,” Rick said, picking up the still twitching WashBot from the floor and stuffing it into one of the many pockets of his lab coat, then began to usher everyone out of the room. He turned to locate Alice and found her leaning against the workbench with a knowing smile on her lips, the madness of his family clearly amusing her greatly. 

She sauntered past him toward the house, pausing briefly to reach up and peck him on the cheek.  
“Merry Christmas, Rick” she murmured with a wink before disappearing after the Smiths. 

 

* * *

 

Once the family were all dressed and washing powder free they convened in the living room around the ostentatious, overcompensation of a Christmas tree which, of course, had been selected by Jerry. Summer and Morty sat on the floor, ripping at paper excitedly, enjoy for a moment the simple joy of being kids at Christmas. Rick hid his treacherous smile behind his flask where he sat on the sofa next to Alice, who was being plied with Jerry's revolting homemade eggnog. 

“Hey, th-th-those ones are from me, open them,” Rick demanded, pointing to a small pile of scrunched up paper which seemed to be held together with about nine roles of sticky tape. Morty handed out the gift to the rest of the Smiths and after about 15 minutes of unravelling tape, they managed to get them open. Morty coughed awkwardly, turning his gift over in his hands. It looked like a jet black crystal ball with swirling blue mist inside. 

“Rick... This is your electrical storm generator...” He looked around the living room at Summer's new kitten gun and his mother's 'water-to-wine' glass. “Th-this is just your stuff from the garage you don't want anymore.”  
“Well I think it's awesome,” said Summer, aiming at the top of the tree and launching a tiny, vicious kitten into it and watching with glee as it started to maul the angel.  
“M-Morty-Morty don't be so ungrateful. I-I-I wrapped them, didn't I? Be more like your sister.” Rick crossed his arms and slummed back into the sofa cushions in a sulk, he could see Alice trying to stifle her tipsy laughter beside him but refused to acknowledge her. He fucking hated Christmas.  
“Mine looks like a severed hand, does it do something cool too?” Jerry asked, dodging a kitten that flew past his shoulder from Summer's new weapon.  
“No, Jerry. It's just a severed hand, to symbolised your role in this family as a useless appendage,” Rick deadpanned. Jerry squawked and ran from the room to dispose of it, holding the hand from one of the fingertips. 

Beth rolled her eyes at her husband, paying no mind to the fact her father had just gifted him human remains purely as an excuse to insult him.  
“Dad? Didn't you get anything for Alice?” She asked encouragingly.  
“Hmm? Oh yeah, I-I-I'll give it to her later,” he said gruffly.  
“Bet you will,” Morty muttered under his breath with a sideways glance at Summer. The pair shared a subtle low-five.  
“What was that?” Rick asked with a pointed look at his Grandson. Little shit was getting far too cocky for his own good.  
“Nothing!” Morty squeaked, sensing he may have inched over the line slightly.  
“Yeah, that's what I thought.” Rick took an aggressive swig from his flask. The last thing he needed was a lecture from his daughter about inappropriate age gaps and 'oh think of Mom'. 

Beth jumped from her seat, oblivious, and started to root around under the tree.  
“Well I got you something, Alice, well I made it actually!” She presented her young house guest with a lumpy looking package.  
Rick eyed the present with a mounting sense of dread and his suspicions were confirmed when Alice ripped open the paper and the smell of burning hair hit his nose.  
“Oh, Beth, it's... You shouldn't have!” She said with a tight smile. She held in her hands a bust of what Rick imagined was meant to be a horse, made entirely from bones, hoof pieces, and scraps of hind. But of course, Alice was far too polite to point out the undeniable creepiness of the item.  
“What a... bold piece,” she hedged, Rick sat back and enjoyed watching her squirm. “The composition is... Well, let's just say Dalí would have been proud!” She placed the monstrosity back in the paper and placed it back on the floor.  
“See!” Beth addressed to the rest of the room, “Alice appreciates my creativity and she's an artist so it means more!” Rick rolled his eyes, he'd have to remember to help Alice discreetly get rid of it later. 

The stomach-churning domesticity of the day was starting to make Rick's skin crawl. He caught himself on a number of occasions indulging in the ridiculous traditions of the holidays, even going so far as to wear a party hat, but that was nowhere near as jarring as the fact that Alice seemed to have slipped seamlessly into his quaint family set up. It was for this reason that as soon as she set down her knife and fork at the end of dinner he whisked her away to the garage and ushered her into the spaceship. 

“Where are we going?” She asked, throwing her feet up onto the dash.  
“Put your feet down. I-it's a surprise.” Rick grumbled.  
“Ooo! Romantic!” She teased, swinging her legs over onto his lap instead.  
“Don't push is, Montgomery. I-I-I reached my 'holiday goodwill' limit many, _many_ hours ago.” But he still found himself throwing on the autopilot and massaging her calves nonetheless. 

He'd been itching to take Alice to this planet all day. It wasn't really for the romantic setting, but even he couldn't deny it's beauty. It was more the hidden symbolism of the place that he hoped to use to his advantage. 

With the engine freshly topped up with concentrated dark matter, it took barely an hour to get to Noxus-Aeternum. Rick glided the ship through the crystal clear atmosphere and set it down in a forest clearing. Perfect, they'd hit it at just the right time. Noxus-Aeternum was almost always covered with dark, snow-heavy clouds, blanketing the whole planet in a thick layer of cotton candy coloured powder, but for a few hours each night, the sky cleared to reveal the full glory of the solar system above. Rick instructed Alice to stay in her seat and dropped down into the waist-deep flurry outside the ship. Despite the thickness, the snow was surprisingly easy to wade through. Making his way around to her side, he pulled open the door and took her by the waist to lift her down. She gasped as her body travelled through the soft flakes.  
“Holy shit! It's warm!” She grinned up at him.  
“Th-that's not all.” Rick scooped up a handful and shoved it into her face, laughing as she spluttered. Slowly her eyes widened as she licked the snow away from her lips.  
“It tastes like candy canes? Peppermint fucking candy canes!” She threw her arms around his neck and squeezed him tightly.  
“You remembered,” she whispered.  
“Remembered what? That you like them? Who doesn't like candy canes?” He scoffed.  
“They're my favourite!” She squealed, scooping up another handful the raking some into her mouth with her teeth.  
“Oh, are they? Cool,” he muttered, as though that piece of information didn't pop into his head every time he'd smelt, tasted, or even mentioned peppermint for the past 40 years. 

He took her by the hand and pulled her through the dense snow towards the forest. Black, ominous pine trees rose high above them, their skeletal branches creaking in the wind and sending shimmering pink flakes down on top of them as though it was still snowing.  
“It's so quiet,” Alice said in hushed tones, as though the stillness of the forest was infectious.  
“Yeah, nothing lives here. The snow isn't actually warm, th-th-that would be impossible. It has a chemical in it that scrambles the nerve respecters. It's a carnivorous planet, i-i-it tricks you into snuggling down into the warmth of its snow while it freezes you to death, then absorbs your body.”  
“What the fuck?” Alice suddenly looked panicked, staring at the ground as though it was going to swallow them both whole.  
“Relax,” Rick waved his hand dismissively, “I-i-it'll only take dead things, just tell me when your toes start going numb.” 

On and on they walked waiving their way through the dense coal coloured trees, hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder. Soon they were spat out of the other side of the forest at the top of a hill, the starry sky spilling out before them. Rick reluctantly released her hand and dug out a little hollow for them to sit in and pulled her down with him, wrapping his arms around her waist and reclining them both back against the tightly packed snow bank he'd made so they could gaze up at the stars. 

“What do you think?” He asked quietly, hating the hint of nervous eagerness in his voice.  
“It's beautiful,” she whispered back, moulding her body further into Rick's side. They lay in silence for a while listening to the warm wind rattle the spiny branches of the obsidian pines. Eventually, Alice broke the mystical quiet, her lightly gravelled voice complimenting the eerie soundscape around them.  
“Sometimes I feel like I've missed out on so much, but then I experience things like this and I realise there's so much left to see.”  
Rick turned to rub his nose into her hair, closing his eyes and breathing in the gently floral spice of her shampoo again. “Trust me, Sweetheart, you've missed nothing worth getting upset over.”  
“Do you ever think about what it would have been like if I hadn't been taken?” She asked casually.  
Rick's eyes snapped open. “No,” he lied.  
“But, I mean, there must be dimensions where I didn't leave... Did you ever look for one?”  
“No” he lied again. He didn't like where this conversation was headed, he had planned on being the one doing the interrogating.  
“What was it like?” Alice whispered after a short pause.  
“Wh-wh-what was what like?” He asked, knowing full well.  
“What was it like after I was taken?” She asked, her voice barely audible.

Rick sighed loudly and tucked her head under his chin in a feeble attempt at hiding his face.  
Alice nuzzled his neck with her nose. “Hey, forget it, it doesn't matter. I shouldn't have asked.” She said kindly. 

Rick said nothing. He had long since realised that shame and regret were pointless emotions which only prevented people from taking risks and living life to the fullest, but that didn't mean he didn't feel them. In the same way, even though other people's opinions of him mattered very little, a large part of him didn't want Alice to be disappointed, just like the part of him that didn't want Morty to find out he wasn't a superhero. He hated that people mattered to him, it would only spell disaster. He sighed once more, pressing a kiss onto her fiery hair. Fuck it, what was the point of denying her this? In any case, it'd be useful currency to find something out in return.

“I... I tried to kill myself.”  
Alice's body stiffened against him.  
“What?” The horror in Alice's voice burnt him like a white-hot spark.  
“Wh-wh- after you- about 6 months after you left. I couldn't- I didn't want- I-I-I didn't see the point in living anymore I was so miserable. That's how Diane and I got together.”  
She placed a hand firmly against his chest, pushing herself away and Rick cringed when he glanced down to see her shocked face.  
“But hey, look, i-i-it doesn't matter! Ok?” He implored, already regretting giving up this information.  
“Of course it matters, Rick! You tried to- oh God!” Rick watched in dismay as her face crumpled and tears sprang to her eyes.  
“No!” He near yelled sitting up and dropping his face into his hands. “Don't start fucking crying, it was 40 years ago! Listen,” He pulled her up and gripped her shoulders, boring into her with hard eyes. “It doesn't fucking matter. Nothing we do matters. We're all just a bunch of carbon-based flesh puppets bumbling around, waiting to die. I-i-if I hadn't tried to top myself I never would have got with Diane, we wouldn't have had Beth, and we wouldn't be sat here now. Fate i-is fucking bullshit, but if I've learnt anything from travelling the multi-verse it's that every decision we make changes the course of our lives, from what you have for breakfast to whether you pull the trigger, millions and trillions of different paths to take and we chose this one. The one that lead us to here.” He slid his hands from her shoulders up her slender neck to take her delicate face in his hands. “I don't regret one moment of my life.” It was a lie, but it didn't matter. He leant forward and kissed her, expressing his sorrow and passion and care with the movement of his lips and the stroking of his tongue. 

When they broke apart, after dipping back down for a few more light pecks, he saw Alice's eyes were still glassy with tears but her smile was at least hopeful.  
“I don't understand about you and Diane,” she said with a shake of the head. “How did you doing... you know, how did that prompt you to get together?”  
Rick's hands dropped from her face as he shrugged. “She liked the idea of fixing me, I liked the idea that I could be fixed. When we both realised it wasn't possible we were already married with a baby. I-i-it wasn't... a good marriage. At all. I treated her badly, but she was no angel either. It was- Well, it's over now.” He stroked her hair back from her face. “All I ever wanted was you.” 

Even as the words were leaving his mouth he couldn't quite believe he was saying them. Nor, it seemed, could Alice as her face grew pinched and her eyes threatened to leak again. To be so candid, when he wasn't even that drunk, was basically unheard of for him. Distraction was key now, to move the spotlight away from himself and focus on the real reason he brought her here. 

He grasped her by the chin and turned her head towards the stars, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and tugging her in close so he could direct her line of sight.  
“You see that star there? That bright one just across from that little red speck? That's what I brought you here to see.”  
“Ok... Why?” Alice asked, clearly unimpressed with one tiny star amongst millions.  
“That's our Sun,” he murmured, pausing to let the information sink in. “That sphere of hot gas, the thing that gives our planet life, the entity which holds such importance to humans... I-i-it's just another star in someone else's sky.”  
“That makes me feel so insignificant,” Alice said with a rye smile.  
Rick laughed and kissed her cheek, “Yeah, because you are. And that's good! It means that all the worries that are so very important to you, all the things which, I don't know, you might feel ashamed of, in the grand scheme of things, really aren't that significant,” he said nonchalantly, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. He felt his heart sink as she narrowed hers and turned to look at him. 

“Did you bring me here just to prove a point? Wait- Did you only tell me about Diane because you wanted to know what I'd been up to before I reached you?” Her voice grew angrier with each word. Shit.  
“I- No-”  
“You used your fucking suicide attempt as fucking leverage to get me to talk?”  
“Well, you said if I told you how we got together you'd tell me!” He retorted, slightly put out that she was taking this all so personally.  
“Why do you want to know?!” She spat in disbelief. “You think you want to but you really _really_ don't.”  
Rick rolled his eyes. “I'm a big boy Ali, I can handle your shameful little secret,” he scoffed.  
Alice kicked at the pastel snow bank in frustration, make Rick flinch slightly, his pretty little loose cannon living up to her name.  
“Fine! You wanna hear me say it? I don't know why because you've obviously already guessed. But fine. You wanna hear me say I sucked cock for money? You wanna hear me say I let countless alien creatures touch me with their claws and their paws and their disgusting slimy mouths? I was desperate and scared and all I wanted to do was get home. To you.” Unbidden tears spilt over the edges of her eyes. “It's surprising how popular human prostitutes are in space,” she said bitterly. 

Rick liked to be right almost all of the time. But this was one of those rare occasions when he hated it. It hurt to hear his suspicions confirmed, it made his stomach clench and bile rise in his throat to think scumbag alien cunts had had their appendages all over his beautiful, sweet, caring, vivacious girl. It made him want to track each and every one of them down and torture them into madness. He also hated that fact that Alice had been kind of right too, it almost would have been better not knowing the truth. All of this must have been playing out plainly over his face because her chin started to wobble and more tears began to flow, staining her cheeks with sadness. 

“And now you hate me for it, don't you,” she whispered, her voice the epitome of despair itself.  
“No.” Rick grabbed her once more and pulled her in tight to his chest, ignoring her struggles to get away. “You're right, I-I-I don't like hearing that you did that. I never want you to be in that situation again. But I would never, ever hate you just because I didn't like something you did that you had no control over.”  
Tears clawed at Rick's own eyes as Alice sobbed into his chest, great heaving, bone-shaking sobs that told a story of a time she'd rather forget. He held her in his arms until she cried herself out, stroking up and down her back and whispering nonsense into her ear, how proud he was of her, how brave she was, how much he admired her, even though the knowledge of what she'd been forced to do to see him again was burning his insides. 

After her little hyperventilating breaths had calmed, she looked up at him, her face blotchy but still the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.  
“My toes are starting to go numb,” she mumbled with a small smile. Rick wrap the edge of his sleeve over his thumb and wiped away her tears, then kissed her soundly as if to seal the deal.  
“Ok, Baby, let's go home.” 

 

* * *

 

By the time they arrived back at the Smith household the family had already tucked themselves up in bed. Rick carried Alice into the house and dropped her down on the sofa before going to make them hot whiskies to calm their frayed nerves. It had been a dick move to manipulate her like he had, especially when the truth had been so hard to swallow, but at least now he knew. He returned to the living room and flicked on the TV to some mindless drivel and fed her whiskey til she grew sleepy against his side. He laid down on the sofa, planting one foot on the floor and throwing the other up against the back of the sofa then pulled her down between his legs so they lay chest to chest. She snuggled into him and closed her eyes against the flashing blue light of the TV screen.  
“I hate that you tried to kill yourself over me,” she mumbled. Rick kissed the top of her head and wrapped his arms around her, one stroking over her shoulder blade, the other slipping into the back of her jeans to rest comfortingly on the swell of her behind.  
“Yeah, I know, but no one's perfect. Go to sleep, Sweetheart.” 

They lay like that for a few hours, with Rick drifting in and out of consciousness until he was startled fully awake by a gasp from the kitchen doorway. He popped his head over the back of the sofa to see Beth retreating back into the kitchen, stuttering the whispered apology. Great, that's exactly what he needed right now, more hysterics. He slid out from underneath Alice to go and do some damage control, and by some miracle managed not the wake her. 

He might not have been in his daughter's life much, but he could read her like a book and knew exactly how she'd react at seeing Rick with another woman. Weird, misplaced jealousy and anger at his disregard for a family that crumbled decades ago. And right on cue, there she was as soon as he rounded the doorway, back turned to him, biting her knuckle to try and keep in her sobs. Fan-fucking-tastic. 

“Beth, Sweetie, what's wrong?” He asked, trying to keep the eye roll out of his voice.  
“I- sorry for interrupting, just- go-go back to your- to Alice,” she blubbered.  
“Look, m-m-me and Alice, we're- it's complicated ok? But i-i-it's nothing to start crying over!”  
Beth spun around, her angry expression diminished slightly by her flannel pyjamas complete with horse pattern.  
“Dad, she's younger than me! She's not that much older than Summer even, how could you?”  
Rick let his eye roll be known this time. “Yeah, but she's not though is she. This isn't about that anyway, you just don't want me to be with anyone other than your mother.”  
“Because I thought you loved Mom!” She yelled with a stamp of her foot.  
Rick pinched the bridge of his nose. “Oh for fuck's sake Beth, your- Diane was psychotic! This idea that we had this perfect family life that I ruined by walking out is total bullshit and you know it! I was a piece of shit, and a terrible father, but your mom was a nutcase too. You need to stop seeing the world through rose-tinted glasses, y-y-you really are your mother's daughter.” He walked past her to get to the alcohol cupboard and pulled down the nice vodka.  
“Oh so trying to see the best in people makes me a bad person?” She asked, her shrill voice grating on his nerves. He pouring himself a stupidly large glass then turning back to Beth, keeping the bottle out of her reach. This sort of ridiculous behaviour shouldn't be rewarded.  
“No, but it makes you an idiot! Your mother should have changed the locks and never let me back in after I left the first time. She was an idiot too.”  
“So it's all her fault? Why did you keep coming back if it was so awful to live with us?” Beth's face looked puffy with tears. What the hell was wrong with all the women in his life? Was crying all they did?  
“Because, Sweetie, I have poor self-control and I tend to take advantage of people! Diane and me, we had our high points, but it was nothing that could outweigh the barrage of shit that was the rest of that marriage.” He took Beth by the shoulders and looked at the earnestly. “The best thing I ever did for you was walk out of that door. I-I-I'm sorry we fucked up your childhood, but you have your own family now. Don't I get the chance to be happy too?” He watched with grim satisfaction as Beth's frosty, dramatic exterior started to melt. At least he hadn't lied while manipulating her this time. 

“Oh, I'm sorry Dad!” She wailed and threw her arms around him.  
He hugged her back stiffly. “That's ok, Sweetie, go on back to bed now.” He pushed her in the direction of the stairs.  
“Night, Dad,” she called tearfully  
“Yeah, night.” Rick scrubbed his hands over his face. There was no way Alice didn't hear that. 

Sure enough, she was perched stiffly on the couch when he returned.  
“Maybe I should go,” she whispered with a sad smile.  
“Maybe,” Rick grunted. He took her hand and pulled her up into a hug, nudging into her neck with his nose and breathing in her scent, he would never be able to get enough of this woman. But now a kind of mournfulness had gripped his heart, dragging up years of history and, for now at least, he needed to be alone. 

 

* * *

 

As they bumped down into the small parking area at the back of her apartment Alice sighed heavily. It had been a mixed bag of a day. The heady joy of being with a family at Christmas and the sheer pleasure of how content she felt around Rick contrasted sharply with the horrifying knowledge of his suicide attempt, her awful secret about her time on Tortuga Delta, and the revelation of how much her abduction had fucked up not just the lives of Rick and Diane, but also the knock-on effect it had had on Beth. Rick shut off the engine and turn to her. He'd been silent the whole way here, lost in his own thoughts. He reached over to take her hand and tugged on it.  
“C'mere, sit in my lap for a minute.”  
Alice scrambled over the central console and sat astride his thighs. He placed his hands on either side of her ribs and stroked little circles over her waist with his thumbs.  
“I-I-I-I don't really know how to do... all this. But I don't want it to stop. So please, please, I-I-I'm begging you, don't overthink what happened tonight. I lo- ahem... I care about you... a lot, and I don't want to lose you again.”

Alice tried her best not to smile too hard at his little slip-up, he wouldn't like that.  
“I promise I won't, everything is fine.”  
Rick cupped her face and drew her near, gently brushing his lips against hers until she initiated the kiss for him, allowing him to flex his dominate tendencies just a little.  
“I'll text you tomorrow, I wanna finish what we started in my room this morning,” he grinned at her when they broke apart.  
“Sounds like a plan,” she winked back at him.  
Reaching over her opened his door end let her jump down onto the hard concrete ground.  
She gave him a little wave and started over to the rickety steps that lead to her front door. Halfway through her climb, she turned around to see him still watching her, making sure she was safe before flying off. She waved again before hurrying up the rest of the way, eager to get out of the cold. 

She shut the front down and leant back against it, a huge smile taking over her face as she heard the ship taking off outside. She doubted she'd ever felt so happy in all her life. Pushing herself off the door she made her way down the dark hallway towards her bedroom, but as she passed the entrance to the living room she sensed something wasn't quite right. 

She stood in the open doorway and squinted through the gloom until her eyes focused on a silhouette sitting in her armchair. Suddenly the lamp clicked on and Alice was momentarily blinded. But through her half-closed eyes, she could make out the petite form of someone she hadn't seen in almost two years. 

“Tammy?” She gasped, she eyes growing wide.  
Tammy grinned and licked her bottom lip in a grotesque imitation of hunger, her skin-tight federation uniform straining as she crossed her legs in a mock casual pose.  
“Hello, Alice. Long time, no see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun duuuuuuun! What's going to happen next? I promise I will update quicker next time :) ALSO I have a Tumblr now! So come over and say hi if you're that way inclined: [PanthaPrincess](https://panthaprincess.tumblr.com/)


	16. You And I Kept Looking To Transcend The Fact That I Was Breaking To Your Bend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An anthology of memories.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! As you might have seen I've worked out how many chapters are left in this fic and we're nearly at the end! Hopefully, you'll all enjoy the conclusion to this story. 
> 
> Big love to [Malib000](https://archiveofourown.org/users/malib000) once again for Betaing and being a constant source of encouragement :) 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who read, commented, and left kudos on the last chapter, it really means a lot! Let me know what you thought of this one, your feedback enriches my life! :)
> 
> Chapter Title From [Begin The End by Placebo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtBTzyeVSOw)

Rick slumped back in his desk chair, twisting it from side to side with the ball of his foot as he watched a fly attempting to stove its head in on the garage window. Nothing was holding his attention today, not his work, not Morty, not the TV. He checked his phone for what felt like the seven hundredth time since he texted Alice after he woke up at around noon.

_Rick  
Hey, hope you're doing what you were told and not freaking out about last night. We can talk about it later if you wanna come over. Or I could come to you. See? I'm being mature. Also, I wanna eat your pussy. R x_

That had been 5 hours ago and he'd had no response. His mind had been drifting to unwanted places since his argument with Beth the previous evening. Though she claimed everything was fine, she still had that wounded animal look about her at dinner which only served to fuel the memories of his trash fire of a marriage. 

Most days it didn't bother him. So what if he had a crappy relationship, people get divorced every day, all over the world. But sometimes the memories of the constant, tiring misery he endured, on and off for 16 years did grind him down a little. 

He took a pull from his flask and desperately clawed at his mind, trying to hold back its wanderings, but to no avail.

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


_17th May 1977_

Rick stood in the parking lot of Muskegon's 'Century Club Ballroom' staring up at the stars, cigarette in one hand, bottle of self-spiked beer in the other. The garish disco lights from the wedding reception flashed out across the dark lot but did nothing to dim the twinkling of those enticing pinprick of light. Popping his smoke between his lips he dragged on it while tugging his bow tie loose. If it had been up to him he would have gotten married in a pair of jeans and a lab coat, but of course, this was Diane's special day and he didn't have the energy to fight her. 

He sighed and focused on one star in particular, the fifth brightest in the sky. Vega, the falling eagle. The was no real reason to pick that star, it was understated, although to some scientists it was considered incredibly important. He chuckled mournfully to himself, he supposed it seemed quite fitting, really, to look at that star when he took time to remember her. He lifted his bottle in a toast to it, then felt incredibly stupid for indulging in such a pointless act. He took a swig and let the liqueur tainted beer dribble down his chin, using the sleeve of his uncomfortable polyester suit to wipe it away. 

He jumped slightly when a pair of hands slipped around his waist and a little blonde head poked under his arm. Diane beamed up at him, a vision in white, looking more beautiful and ethereal than she ever had.  
“There you are! I've been looking everywhere for you!”  
Rick smiled indulgently down at her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and pulling her close into his chest.  
“Hello there, Mrs Sanchez,” he said, pressing a quick kiss to her forehead.  
Diane squealed giddily. “I'm never going to get used to that,” she laughed.  
“Well, you better, there's no escape now,” Rick quipped, taking another drag from his cigarette.  
“Oh, Rick, put that out, would you? You're going to make the suit smell,” she complained, swatting at his wrist.  
He gave her an incredulous look. “What a-a-and the fifteen men in there smoking cigars isn't? Besides, i-i-it's not like I'm ever going to wear this again,” he grumbled stamping out his cig and tugging at the choking collar.  
Diane took his hand and pulled him towards the door, back to the cheesy music, gaudy flashing lights, and wedding guests he neither knew nor cared about.  
“Come on I want to dance!” She called, voice full of excitement, hope, and love.  
“Yeah, yeah, alright,” Rick conceded.  
He turned to take one last look at Vega, shining quietly amongst her fellows, unseen by most, but not by him, and let himself be dragged back to a life he'd never asked for.

  
  


* * *

  
  
_2nd November 1979_

Rick hunched over the desk in his study, a tiny box room in a tiny apartment they could barely afford, and massaged his temple so hard he thought he might crack his skull. An ear-piecing, blood curling screaming had been emanating from the baby's room for the past half an hour and Rick was approaching breaking point. He glanced at the desk clock, 3:12 am. Fuck this. 

He stood up so hard the old wooden dining chair he'd been sitting on tipped backwards and smashed into the wall, leaving a dent in the plaster he couldn't bring himself to care about. He threw open the door and marched down the hall to the nursery. 

Beth lay in her cot, fat little fists balled up, face purple as she expressed her discomfort for the whole neighbourhood to hear. He glanced to the corner where Diane sat, staring blankly at the wall as though she was enjoying a little Chopin and not the angry wails of their infant daughter. 

Rick came to stand in front of her and threw his arms out to the side in incredulity.  
“Wh-wh-what the fuck are you doing?”  
Diane slowly raised her head to look at him, as though she'd only just realised he was there.  
“Huh?” She asked, her face wan and exhausted.  
“Elizabeth is crying her little heart out a-a-and you're just sat here like a piece of furniture!” He shouted, prompting Beth to raise her game from the other side of the room.  
Diane's face creased in confusion. “But you said to leave her if she cried,” she stated.  
“Yeah, if she's being fussy, not if she's apoplectic!” He hissed, walking over to the cot.  
Diane stood up to hover behind him. “I-I've tried Rick! I picked her up, I put her down, she just screams!” The woman sounded desperate, but Rick had no time for post-partum hysteria. He bent down and lifted Beth out of the cot, cradling her in his arms and began to rock her, despite the little monster kicking and beating him with her chubby limbs. 

“She's just teething, aren't you, Sweetie,” he cooed, bending his head so she could see his face in the gloom of the nursery.  
He walked over to flick on the little moon and stars night light, bouncing his little girl as he went. Slowly Beth began to quieten down, her screams replaced with little hiccuping breaths.  
“There we go, Sweetie! That was all you needed wasn't it, a cuddle from Daddy.” He brushed over her sore, puffy cheeks with his finger, letting her grab his long nose and pull on it gently.

“How do you do that?” Diane asked at his right shoulder.  
He looked down at her. “Hmm?” He grunted, still a little pissed that she had forced him to interrupt his work.  
“Stop her crying. I did everything; changed her, tried to feed her, rocked her, sang to her. She just... just-” Rick silenced her by pressing his lips to hers in a brief kiss.  
He lifted her chin to look her in the eye. “Maybe stop freaking out and she will too. Confidence is key. Isn't that right, my little fucking nightmare,” he said sweetly to his softly gurgling daughter.  
“Don't swear at her,” Diane said weakly.  
Rick rolled his eyes and handed Beth to her. “I'm sure she'll hear worse in her life. I-I-I've got to get back to work.” He paused before he turned and kissed his wife again, more in reassurance than in desire. “You're a great mom,” he coddled, prompting a hopeful little smile from Diane. In truth, she was no better or worse than most mothers but the more she believed it the less likely it was that Rick would have to swoop in and save the day. He left without another word, mind already back to equations and schematics. 

  
  


* * *

  
  
_30th April 1983_

Rick huffed out a humourless laugh through his nose when his key turned in the door. He shook his head, he'd thought for sure this time the locks would have been changed, but apparently, his wife was just as much of a glutton for punishment as he was. He swung open the door and let his bag fall from his shoulder, heavy with various items vital to his work from every corner of the galaxy. 

“Oh, so you finally decided to come back,” a bitter voice piped up from the other side of the living room. Rick looked up to see Diane sat in the armchair, a glass of white wine in her hand. Christ, it was only 2 pm.  
He sighed, “Jesus, Diane. I've just walked through the door and you're already-”  
“Daddy!” A tiny blonde bundle launched itself towards him from the third to bottom step. He rushed forward to catch her before her knees buckled and swung her around before sitting her on his hip.  
“Hey, Sweetie!” He grinned at her. “Did you get taller?!” He asked in mock surprise.  
“Yeah silly, I'm a big girl now!” Beth yelled happily, flinging her little arms around his neck. “But you missed my birthday party, Daddy,” she frowned with a disapproving look. Shit, she looked just like her mother when she did that.  
“I know, Baby. I'm sorry, but Daddy had to work.” He stroked her thick fringe away from her face, trying to pacify his little tyrant. 

Diane scoffed behind him and Rick turned to glare at her over Beth's shoulder. “But you got my present though right?” He said in his sweetest voice, hard eyes fixed on his seething wife.  
Beth nodded frantically. “Yeah, yeah! It's a tiny pony! Like a big pony but small, Mommy got me a cage for him and his name is Boris” She rattled off.  
“Boris? Kind of a weird name for a pony,” Rick moved his head back so he could see her and quirked an eyebrow.  
“Mommy says I can't keep him,” she said solemnly.  
He glanced over to Diane who was resolutely not looking at him. Busted. “Oh really? Well, maybe Mommy doesn't realise how special he is! He's from a planet far far away where all the tiny horses live, a-a-and when Daddy saw it he thought of you” he informed Beth, leaning down to give her a little Eskimo kiss.

“Why don't you go play with... Boris while I talk to Mommy, ok?” He said, giving her a pat on the back before putting her down and ruffling her hair. As soon as she had clambered back up the stairs on all fours the adoring expression dropped from his face like a mask, revealing his usual scowl in all its glory. When he looked back at the room he realised Diane had vacated and heard the glug of wine being poured from the bottle coming from the kitchen. 

He came to lean on the doorway, entering into a hostile face-off with the woman opposite him who was resting against the counter, full wine glass in a white-knuckled hand.  
“You know one day she's going to realise all this doting father crap is bullshit and you don't actually care about her at all,” she said snidely.  
Rick rolled his eyes. “Of course I care about her she's my daughter.”  
His wife smiled sarcastically, a look which always got under his skin. “But not enough to actually play a role in her life.”  
“You're the one that won't let her keep the horse.” He kept his voice even, he wouldn't be the one to rise to it.  
As always Diane cracked first. “It eats salt, Rick! What kind of animal does that?” She asked, her volume inching ever skyward.  
“I dunno, the kind that eats salt I guess,” he said nonchalantly, pushing himself away from the door frame to fix himself a drink. If she could get sloshed in the day so could he. 

“Where have you been?” Diane finally demanded. Rick knew she'd been itching to ask that from the moment she'd heard his key in the door.  
Rick growled in exasperation, scrubbing his hand over his face while he added more vodka to his orange juice. “Working! How many times do we have to go over this?”  
“But doing what though? Because most of the time you come back stinking of alcohol and women,” she spat.  
“Oh for the love of God, Diane!” Rick rounded on her towering over her in an effort to intimidate. Not that he'd ever hurt her, but the threat was there.  
“What?! Tell me I'm wrong!” She yelled, chin jutting out defiantly as she glared up at him. “I had to give up my job to look after Beth because you couldn't keep your eyes off the au pair!”  
Rick groaned and laughed in disbelief. “No, you _decided_ to give up your job because you're paranoid! That's your issue, not mine.”  
She took an aggressive gulp from her glass. “Oh don't give me that bullshit, I know you've cheated on me.”

That was the straw that broke the camel's back. “Well maybe if you weren't such a sour bitch all the time I wouldn't have to!”  
As soon as the words left his mouth he regretted them. He saw her flinch as though he really had struck her, pain etched into her young, gentle face. Rick hated himself for causing her to look like that.  
“I...I didn't mean that. Diane, I didn't mean that. I-I-I'm just tired, I've never cheated on you,” he pleaded.  
“You seriously expect me to believe that?” She asked softly, defeat evident in her tone.  
Rick clenched his jaw, honesty was the best policy in his book. “Yes, because what would be the point? If I wanted to be with other people I'd leave you.”  
She left out a shaky breath. “You mean to say you haven't left me already?” She asked sadly.  
Rick dug his nails into his palm and snagged his glass off the counter. “I don't have time for this, I have things to do.”

He walked past her, headed for the garage, but stopped by her side briefly to take her by the waist and kiss the top of her head. He didn't have to look at her to know that big fat tears were rolling down her cheeks, they'd done this too many times not to know how it all played out off by heart. He hated himself for giving into this repeating cycle of unhappiness, but honestly, he didn't have the balls to break it. 

  
  


* * *

  
  
_14th January 1987_

Rick shifted awkwardly to try and find a more comfortable position. What a great fucking birthday this was turning out to be. With it being a 'special occasion' Diane had _allowed_ him to have sex with her, if you could even call this sex. Their bedroom antics had been pretty decent before Beth was born, a little vanilla for his tastes if he was honest but nothing to be sniffed at, Diane was an attractive woman. But nowadays their carnal relations were basically non-existent, therefore Rick had jumped at the chance to get his leg over this evening. It was not, however, what he'd call satisfying. Despite his best efforts, Diane was simply laying there like a fucking corpse as he thrust into her. Participation in this event was clearly optional and his wife had declined the invitation, both mentally and physically. The warning sign should have been having to smear himself in KY jelly before he could even consider entering her, and that was despite 15 minutes of going downtown. That at least had gained a little response, even if it was just the occasional sigh. This, however, was just too much to bear. 

He paused mid thrust and looked down at her in questioning.  
“Wh-what's up with you?” He demanded.  
“Hmm? Nothing, I'm fine, carry on, it's great,” she said passively.  
“Really? 'Cause this feels more like a rape than a husband having sex with his wife,” He deadpanned. He slid his deflating cock out of her and flopped back onto the bed.  
“I- I'm sorry Rick,” she mumbled, staring up at the ceiling.  
“It's fine, whatever. I-I just want to know what's wrong,” he shrugged feel defeated.  
She turned on her side to look at him, her face awkward. She'd always been a prude but never like this.  
“I just... I don't feel... loved,” she admitted.  
Rick turned his head slowly to look her in the eye, his eyebrows raised in surprise.  
“Oh...” He scratched at the back of his neck. “Well, I mean I can go down on you again if you like?”  
“No, no. That's not what I mean.” She sighed and turned back to the ceiling, pulling the covers up to hide her body from him. “I just feel like you'd rather be... somewhere else.”  
“Diane-”  
“No, I know what you're going to say,” she interrupted. “But I just can't be with you like this if I don't know if you're going to stay.” Rick could hear her voice growing thick with emotion, emotions he had no idea how to deal with.  
“I'm here now aren't I?” He offered.  
She turned to him again and smiled sadly. “That's not enough.” With that, she leant over and kissed him softly then rolled onto her other side to flicked off the light. “Happy Birthday, Rick,” she whispered.  
'Yeah,' he thought to himself, 'Happy fucking Birthday to me.'

  
  


* * *

  
  
_13th February 1989_

A cardboard box slammed onto the kitchen table causing Rick to drop his morning coffee into his lap, scolding his upper thighs and genitals in the process.  
“Ah! Motherfucker! What the hell, Diane?!” He yelled, grabbing a tea towel to try and blot the hot liquid out of his trousers.  
“What the _hell_ is all this shit?” She demanded, completely uninterested in her husband's first degree burns.  
Rick narrowed his eyes at the box she'd basically thrown at him. It was the one he kept on a low shelf, easy to reach for little hands.  
“That's Bethy's toy box,” he shrugged wondering what the hell she had a problem with.  
“It's full of weapons, Rick!” She screeched making him wince in annoyance.  
“She's a sensible girl, she wouldn't hurt herself.” He wafted a hand at her, dismissing her trivial concerns. He picked up his mug and went to refill it, sloshing in a little of his flask while his back was turned. Before he could reach the coffee maker, however, Diane grabbed his shoulder and yanked him round to face her.  
“It's not her I'm worried about! Rick, she terrifies me, and you're encouraging this bizarre behaviour. You can't tell me you haven't noticed.”  
Rick glanced back at the box. She was right, the collection of items, when compiled like that did give off a 'budding serial-killer' vibe, but Beth was just more intelligent than other kids her age, she got bored easily, just like him when he was younger.  
“She's a... unique and gifted child, Honey. I-I-I-I think you're overreacting.”

Diane's mouth pressed into a hard line. “Do you know how many times I've been called into the school because she's assaulted someone? Or because she took some kids hostage for stealing her headband?” She was livid. “No, of course you wouldn't because you're Never. Fucking. Here!” She punctuated these last words with swats from the towel she'd ripped from Rick's hand.  
“What do you want from me, Diane?” He asked in an irritated voice, holding up his forearms to block any more attacks.  
Diane's eyes widened with incredulity. “I want you to be a father and a husband to this family! Instead of some- some fucking... space pirate! How is that too much to ask?!” She screamed. 

Just then a little voice piped up from behind them.  
“Mommy? What's-”  
“Just get ready for school!” She howled, turning her anger onto the confused 9-year-old.  
Beth nodded, eyes wide as she scampered back towards the stairs. Rick watched Diane's shoulder slump as she realised what she'd done. And Rick did the only thing he knew how to; get his own back.  
“Happy now?” He hissed as he stalked off to find his daughter and comfort her loud enough for his wife to hear. He'd make a point of spending a little extra time with Beth after school to really rub salt into the wound. Nothing got up Diane's nose more that Beth only seeing the good in her father. It never even crossed his mind that it might a bad idea to use his family as pawns in the ever-darkening game of chess he called his life. That was just the way he played it.

  
  


* * *

  
  
_9th August 1989_

Rick had returned home from another month or so long trip and collapsed onto the sofa intending to wash away the aches of travel with cold beer and shit TV, but his plans were interrupted by his darling wife descending on him like a spider from the rafters and wrenching open the collar of his shirt. At first, he thought he might be getting some welcome home lovin' but then he caught sight of her murderous face and reminded himself he'd actually married a soul-sucking harpy disguised as a bio-med student.  
“What is that?” She jabbed at his neck hard making him pull away from her sharply.  
“Ow! You violent bitch,” he grumbled rubbing his neck and standing up to look in the mirror over the fireplace.  
There on his neck sat a large purple-red bruise that looked startlingly like a hickey.  
He laughed somewhat nervously, turning back to his ferocious-looking wife. “Now, I know you're not going to believe me when I say this, but it's not what it looks like.” He held his hands up in defence. Diane growled in the back of her throat, nostrils flaring like an enraged bull.  
“Why won't you just fucking admit it? Just say it! You've been fucking other women!” She laughed somewhat manically.  
“Diane, I-I-I-I swear to fucking god for the thousandth time, I have never had an affair! I'm a piece of shit husband, I'll give you that one, Baby, b-b-but I'm not a total scumbag! Trust me, I've had _12 years_ of a basically sexless marriage and I've felt each and every one of them! Me and my right hand are _more_ than well acquainted at this stage. But I have never, _never_ cheated on you. This,” he pointed to his neck, “is from a fight I had with a Danablorgan. They've got massive suckers on their tentacles. Most fucking action I've had in a long time!” 

Diane stared at him, lips pursed and arms folded. “Well, maybe I have a solution,” she said stiffly.  
Rick raised his eyebrows and circled his wrist in a 'go on' motion.  
“I... I want an open marriage,” she stated as confidently as she could. 

Rick's eyes widened and he drew in a sharp breath throw his nose. “Ok... I- Ok. Right, so this is coming for some- from a woman who gets jealous if I so much as step into a room with a female in it. And now you're just going to-to- gonna be fine with me fucking other people? I-I've got to be honest with you, Diane, I find that _very_ hard to believe.” He folded his arms and shook his head at her, mildly amused by her ridiculous proposition.  
She stuck her nose up defiantly “Well maybe it'd be easier to handle if I knew we were both being unfaithful.”

Rick squeezed over his closed eyes with his thumb and forefinger until he was pinching the bridge of his bony nose. “This is insane.” He said almost to himself. “Wouldn't a divorce just be easier? I-I mean we've separated countless times, you clearly have someone in mind or you wouldn't be putting this idea out there.”  
“Oh, and you'd just love that wouldn't you, getting rid of me for good!” She snapped.  
“I don't even know what's going on here!” Rick threw his arms in the arm in frustration at his wife's increasingly unstable mental state.  
“It's very simple, Rick. You fuck who you want and I will too. Then everyone is happy." She smiled snidely. "Just don't do it in the house.”

Rick stared at her, mouth agape. “I... Fine.” he shrugged, turning to wander into the kitchen to grab another beer. Fine. If this'll make her happy. Fine. Whatever. At least now he could finally get his rock's off. He hated how little guilt he would feel fucking someone else, and how little it bothered him that his wife would be doing the same, but what the lady wants, the lady gets.

  
  


* * *

  
  
_30th April 1993_

A massive explosion shook the house to its very foundations, blowing out the garage door and causing numerous roof tiles to crash onto the lawn. Rick sat up in a sooty daze having been thrown against the wall with the force of the blast. He heard footsteps rushing towards the door and Diane's panicked voice calling his name.  
“Rick? Rick?!”  
The door was thrown open and she ran towards him, supporting his head and assessing the damage with her sharp eyes.  
“What did you do? You silly man!” She kissed his blacken forehead a couple of times before Rick pushed her away and staggered to his feet.  
“I'm fine, stop fussing,” he grumbled, sweeping off his clothes ineffectively. 

Diane looked around the garage trying to find the source of the explosion, her eyes resting on the smoking machine before Rick had a chance to hide it.  
“What the fuck are you doing with that?” She demanded, pointing to the Trans-Dimensional Gateway Key that was quivering in the corner.  
“Don't get hysterical, it's fine,” Rick dismissed with a wave of his hand as he started to pick up the fallen objects and put them back on the shelf.  
“Why the hell are you messing with that thing again? I thought you'd perfected your portal gun?” Diane questioned sternly.  
He glanced at her then looked away almost sheepishly. He really hadn't wanted her to find out that he was still working on the TDGK. “Improvements can always be made,” he said defensively.  
She barked out a harsh laugh. “This is about her isn't it.”  
Rick's jaw tightened. “Don't,” he warned in low voice.  
“Oh, of course!” She laughed bitterly again, “Of course you're trying to get her back. Despite the fact you're putting this family in constant danger by doing so. But who would blame you, I could never be as good as her, could I!” She said in a high, shrill voice.  
“Jealousy is beneath you, Diane,” he said, his voice the picture of forced calm.  
“Oh fuck you, I can be whatever the hell I want to be. Just admit it, Rick, for once will you just be honest. I could never be as good as her!” She wailed. 

Rick was silent for a moment, rage bubbling up inside him as he closed his twitching eyes. They had, of course, had the argument many, many times and somehow he'd always managed to keep his head. But this time, whether because of the explosion he'd just been involved in or the years of constant wear and tear on his diplomacy filter, he finally snapped. 

With a roar of angry despair he launched whatever it was he was holding into the wall, watching it shatter into a million glittering shards. He didn't give a fuck what it was, it wasn't important. Nothing was important.  
“No, you can't be as good as her!” His voiced cracked with the raw emotion he'd kept under wraps for years. “And I'm sorry that that's a fact, but please remember that I never asked you to be. You're the one who constantly compares yourself to her, not me!”  
“You don't need to compare us, she's already got your heart and she always will!” Diane's lip shook and tears spilt from her eyes. 

Rick took a steadying breath and picked up the broom to sweep up the mess he'd made.  
“Your words, Diane, not mine. Stop being so dramatic. I didn't marry you to be her stand-in, I married you because I thought I loved you.”  
He looked up at her when she said nothing and saw her defiantly set jaw, her hard narrowed eyes.  
“Well, I can't keep letting you put this family in danger just because I don't want you to leave. I'm putting my foot down Rick, you've got to decide what's more important, us or your fucking _work_.”

Rick opened his mouth to say something but found the words lacking. What could he say? That he'd stay and play happy families until 6 months down the line when he tries to kill himself again? Or tell her that her marriage had been a sham, he'd never loved her like she'd loved him and it would be better for them all if he just left? Both of those options would be heartbreaking for her, but at least with the latter, she would have no sense of guilt. At least with that option, she might one day be happy. And maybe Rick could be too. So he said the only thing he could in that situation.  
“Ok”  
“Ok?” She asked, her face clearing slightly.  
“Ok,” he said, firmly but alluding to no particular decision.  
She gave him a small smile as she retreated back to the house, leaving him in the ruined garage. 

He spent the rest of the evening packing up most of his things, depositing them in a storage dimension and by the time he'd finished it was the early hours of the morning. He padded up the stairs quietly and slipped into Beth's room. 

The pink walls had been papered over with posters of grungy looking bands that 14-year-olds seemed liked, androgynous boys in eyeliner with lank hair. Rick chuckled softly, how would Beth react if she knew he was in a band like that, in some far off place where he could forget about the family he was meant to be looking after. He sighed heavily and sat on the edge of her bed, looking down at her peaceful sleeping face. How could two people filled with such bitterness make something so perfect?

He stroked her long fringe out of her Kohl lined eyes and bent down to kiss her forehead.  
“Daddy will miss you, Sweetie. I... I'm so sorry.” He swallowed around the hard lump in his throat and left the room swiftly before he started getting ridiculously over emotional. This was for the best. 

Out on the landing, he paused briefly to look in on Diane, her face much softer and more beautiful when it wasn't scrunched up in scathing derision. He closed the door quietly and walked back to the garage, shutting the interior door with a firm click, putting a full stop at the end of this phase of his life. He took one last look around the garage, at the strange silhouettes cast against the walls from where the earlier blast had blackened around his things, things that were now gone. He took in a deep breath and shot a portal into the wall and stepped through without a backwards glance. 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


Rick lifted his head from where he'd placed it on his workbench, sitting up to hear his bones creak and crack from the uncomfortable position. He didn't know how long he'd been slumped there, lost in his own thoughts, but the house was quiet and he could hear the hum of the television in the distance so it must be late evening. He rolled his shoulders back and rotated his head to work out the kinks. No more dwelling on the past, he'd indulged in that enough now, time to let it go, move on. Even he had to admit his future was looking brighter with Alice back in his life. 

He was just considering going to see if Morty was still around when his phone lit up with a message from the woman herself. Result! With a grin on his face, he flicked open the screen and read the text with an increasingly puzzled expression. 

_Alice  
“To friendship, to love, and to my greatest adventure yet; Opening myself up to others.”_

The words rang a bell. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he felt like he'd heard them before. Was it some cheesy song lyrics? Was she just trying to be cute? He began to type out a reply asking what it meant when another message came through, this time a photograph. He clicked the fuzzy image to download it, hoping for a nude. But that's not what it was. Everything clicked into place, why he'd not heard from her all day, where he'd heard those words before. 

The picture was a selfie of two people; Alice with a dirty rag tied tightly around her mouth as a gag, frightened eyes red raw with tears that ran down her blotchy face, snot on her upper lip and drool on her chin. The other, doing a peace sign complete with a wink and a cheeky grin, was Special Agent Tammy Gueterman. 

Rick dropped the phone and was out of the garage looking for Morty before it even hit the floor.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much if you stuck with me this far! If anyone has any feedback I'd love it if you'd share, I really want to improve my writing. Thank you!


End file.
